“No” is a full sentence.
And that means that there does not need to be an explanation as to WHY you said “no” in the first place.
I’ve always had trouble telling someone “no,” as I’m sure you have as well, whether it’s our children, friends, significant other, or even someone we work with, yet I know there are times I need to say it, and I say it because it doesn’t serve my Highest Good. I could be tired or not feeling well; I could have too much on my plate at that moment or simply need that down time to just “be.”
And at those moments I’ve always felt compelled to give a full explanation as to WHY I said no, yet over the years I’ve learned that I don’t need to do that. The person on the receiving end of my “no” should respect me enough to accept it. End of story.
But not everyone will accept it.
They are the ones that will keep at you until you give them what they want: a “yes.” It’s their way of controlling you because of their own insecurities over controlling themselves. It’s their way of feeding their own ego by knowing they were able to get what they wanted from you; and it’s their way of making you feel “out of control.”
Remember this: “what you allow will continue.”
It’s okay to think of yourself first and do what’s best for YOU, and if that means saying “no” when you need to, then it’s a good thing. And those moments that you say “yes” when you mean “no” can affect those around you, because when you give in to someone you feel frustrated with yourself, and sometimes even defeated that they won.
Don’t let anyone take your power from you or your free will to simply say “no.”
The people who love you will accept a “no,” but more importantly, the people who RESPECT you will.
And for those that don’t?
Let them go.
You control your life; you make your own boundaries with people; and you have the choice to “enable their behavior or disable their control.”
The choice is always yours.
Think about it.
And please remember this: “NO” is a full sentence.
Wishing you love and light,
~Anne Dennish~