“You’re Doing Just Fine”

The end of the day is nearing and as I get ready to take a long hot bath, unwind and head to bed I have to wonder…did I do everything I wanted to do today?

My answer would be “no,” but I did the best I could.

Did you take care of yourself enough today?

Did you find some time to breathe and just “be?”

Did you get all the things on your “to do” list checked off today?

Did you have the kind of day you wanted to have?

No? I didn’t either, but you know what? I did the best I could today and that’s all I could ask for. Tomorrow is another day.

So was it a bad day because I didn’t accomplish all I wanted to?

No.

It was a good day even though I didn’t do all that I wanted to.

And you know why?

Because it was another day to live, to breathe, to love, to laugh.

And at the end of this day, just like every other day, I did the best I could.

Relax, my friends, tomorrow is another day.

And remember, you’re doing just fine.

We’re all doing just fine.

And it’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“The Lesson In The Pain”

I find a lesson in everything…even in pain, and the last 11 days have been no exception. I’ve been battling severe sciatica. Some days the pain has been excruciating, other days it’s been manageable, yet throughout the last 11 days of being able to do nothing but rest and take it easy, I’ve found myself changing.

Life and all its’ little problems were still knocking at my door, begging to come in with all their stress and drama, but guess what? I didn’t answer the door. I left all that “negative stuff” on the front porch, knowing that it would soon go away if I ignored it…and it did.

Living with pain is a horrible thing, yet it taught me that nothing else mattered except my healing. The pain reminded me that I’m just as important as anyone else, and that this time was mine to rest and get well. And it taught me to let go of things quicker and easier…and be done with them.

I guess you could say this amount of pain for this long of a time changed my behavior and perspective on situations that bring me stress or are filled with drama. I see them differently and learned to quickly dismiss them, not let them bother me, and focus on what’s important: my family, my loved ones, my tribe and ME!

I’m on the mend and it’s been a long, painful 11 days, yet it wasn’t in vain and was for a reason: to learn another life lesson. And while my leg still hurts, I can tell you that my heart doesn’t. I can’t worry about what I can’t change in others, I can only change how I react to them.

And sometimes “no reaction” is the best “reaction” to someone trying to bring their stress and drama into your life.

Try it.

It’s a good thing!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

“NO” Is A Full Sentence

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“No” is a full sentence.

And that means that there does not need to be an explanation as to WHY you said “no” in the first place.

I’ve always had trouble telling someone “no,” as I’m sure you have as well, whether it’s our children, friends, significant other, or even someone we work with, yet I know there are times I need to say it, and I say it because it doesn’t serve my Highest Good. I could be tired or not feeling well; I could have too much on my plate at that moment or simply need that down time to just “be.”

And at those moments I’ve always felt compelled to give a full explanation as to WHY I said no, yet over the years I’ve learned that I don’t need to do that. The person on the receiving end of my “no” should respect me enough to accept it. End of story.

But not everyone will accept it.

They are the ones that will keep at you until you give them what they want: a “yes.” It’s their way of controlling you because of their own insecurities over controlling themselves. It’s their way of feeding their own ego by knowing they were able to get what they wanted from you; and it’s their way of making you feel “out of control.”

Remember this: “what you allow will continue.”

It’s okay to think of yourself first and do what’s best for YOU, and if that means saying “no” when you need to, then it’s a good thing. And those moments that you say “yes” when you mean “no” can affect those around you, because when you give in to someone you feel frustrated with yourself, and sometimes even defeated that they won.

Don’t let anyone take your power from you or your free will to simply say “no.”

The people who love you will accept a “no,” but more importantly, the people who RESPECT you will.

And for those that don’t?

Let them go.

You control your life; you make your own boundaries with people; and you have the choice to “enable their behavior or disable their control.”

The choice is always yours.

Think about it.

And please remember this: “NO” is a full sentence.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“Chemo Healed The Cancer But The Cancer Healed Me”

My last book, “Waking Up: Lessons Learned From My Adventures With Life and Breast Cancer” was born over two years ago while lying on a radiation table for breast cancer.

I’m the type of person that loves meeting people because every single one of us has a story…we ARE a story! Some may not believe that, yet as a writer, I know it’s true. I was out to dinner with my love one night, along with his cousin and his love, and a table full of people I had never met. Yet by the end of the night, I knew them well.

You see, that’s the beauty of paying attention to people and speaking to them, yet more importantly, LISTENING to them. They were laughing at me last night when I said that the whole night of conversations was indeed a story!

So it’s no surprise that “Waking Up” was born; the idea may have begun on a radiation table, yet the stories were already taking shape in my mind, and for the last two years of writing it, more stories were born. Every story is true; most of them are of my personal experiences, and there are a few born out of situations with someone else who graciously allowed me to write about it

Yet, here’s what that one moment that woke me up was: “breast cancer!”

Yes, I had been on a spiritual journey for years, but finding out I had cancer was a big kick in the ass! I realized that as much as I had learned over the years, the lessons were far from over. Breast cancer changed my life and how I live it. That tumor was all the things I never said out loud, all the pain of allowing people to treat me badly. It was everything I never said that I should have, so I made a deal with the cancer: “I’ll open my mouth and use my voice, I’ll make better choices of who I surround myself with, I’ll rid myself of people and situations that make me feel less than good, and I’ll take all of this and write about it to help someone else as long as you leave my body when the time is right.”

I guess the cancer agreed with the deal, because it held up its’ end of the bargain. I did all those things and it left me the day they cut all that stuff out of my body. They did more than a lumpectomy on February 21st. As cancer and I were about to say good-bye that day, I could hear it speaking to me. Sounds crazy, but it wasn’t really. It said: “You’ve done the work and I know it wasn’t easy. I’m sorry to have had to come and visit you, but this journey is over. Remember the lessons, remember to love yourself, and finish up our deal: tell your lessons to everyone you can reach. I’m counting on you.”

Well, in a strange way, chemo may have healed my cancer, but my cancer healed me. It taught me more than I could imagined, and since then, I spread the word, I keep out as much drama and stress as I can, and I walk away from anyone or anything that tries to control and manipulate me. Cancer didn’t abuse me as much as some people have tried to, and I’m smarter because of all of it.

“Waking Up” is so much more than a book; it’s my heart and soul that simply wants to make a difference in someone’s life. Life get’s shorter as we get older, and my goal is to live everyday to the fullest, to show love and kindness to someone who needs it, and most importantly, to make someone laugh and smile.

Struggles will always happen in our lives, yet it’s your attitude and perspective that will handle it and teach you more than you could have ever imagined.  After all, “we don’t become who we are by chance; we become who we are by choice.”

Love your lessons, whether you like them or not, because in the end, miracles happen!

“Chemo healed the cancer but the cancer healed me.”

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

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“Dance Along The Journey”

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The best way to get through this “journey of life” is to dance along with it!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“What Would You Change?”

We’re all a work in progress and there are times when life isn’t exactly the way we wantchange 2 it and we have to ask ourselves “why?” No one can change us or fix a problem in our life; only we can do that. So today I ask you if there’s one thing you could change about yourself or your life, what would it be?

Please take a minute to think about it and post a comment…you may be giving someone else something to think about.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“Breaking Apart”

break apart 2We’ve all broken apart at one time or another in our lives. We may have endured a broken heart, loss of a job, loss of a loved one, or the brokenness of a good friend showing their true colors. Whatever the reason, it’s caused us to “break apart.”

I’ve had my heart broken, endured cancer, gone through divorce, and been hurt by people who I thought were my friends. I’ve been broken many times, yet through it all I learned that all these moments that “broke” me were all lessons I needed to learn. I learned to take the pain of each moment that broke me apart and make peace with it; I learned to be grateful for them because it taught me something about myself and my life that was for my Highest Good; I learned to see it as a blessing in disguise.

So what do you do when you break apart? How do you get through it all? You make a choice. You make a choice to put the pieces back together, and you put them back together stronger. It’s the lessons you learn through them that enable you to put them back differently; stronger, smarter and tougher.

This doesn’t mean that you’ll never “break apart” again, but what it does mean is that the next time you’re faced with a “breaking apart” moment, you’ll be able to handle it differently. You’ll handle it even better. And the time it takes to put the pieces back together get’s shorter and shorter…and that’s because you learned a lesson from each of those moments.

Life is all about perspective and if you can learn to embrace those “breaking apart” moments as a gift towards you having the life you deserve, then you will understand that those moments aren’t forever…just for the time it takes for you to understand the lesson.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

“The Will And The Way”

There are days you may feel like you can’t do it anymore; a day when you feel as though no matter what you do, you can’t seem to get where you want to be or have what you want to have. Yet, it’s on those days that I have to remind myself that “if there’s a will, there is always a way!”

Obstacles will always pop up in our lives, yet there is always a way around them. On the days you feel as though you don’t have the strength,  simply relax, take a breath, and get some sleep, and know that it won’t be like that forever…just for the day.

Here’s to a day of “having the will and finding the way!”

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

will and wayPhoto by Anne Dennish – copyright @2017

“Faith Is A Game Changer”

I’ve been through enough rough times in my life to know that having “faith” in my Higher Power and myself is what kept me strong and what got me through. I couldn’t imagine a life without faith…it gives you hope when things seem hopeless; it gives you strength when you feel weak; it gives you security when you are afraid; and it gives you a “knowing” when you feel as if you know nothing.

You can’t always control what life hands you, but if you’re going to play in this “game of life,” let “faith be your game changer.”

It works every time, and this I know for sure.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“Love Me Through It”

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The seas of life have been rough lately and I find myself trying to ride the waves. I’m patiently waiting for the swells to subside to a calm surf, yet it’s hard to see through the spray. It’s at that moment that I know I need to get a little help and advice from someone I can always count on to weather the storm with me: my love.

He’s one of the most no-nonsense, upfront and direct people I know. He doesn’t skirt around the issue; he attacks it head on. He doesn’t tolerate drama; he ignores it. And when he finds out that what he believed to be true isn’t, he moves on and leaves those people behind.

And he’s my “voice of reason” when I find myself in situations that mentally and emotionally drain me and upset me. He’s the guy that reminds me that I can’t fix anyone, solve their problems, or change their perspective. He’s the guy that tells me that he knows how much I want to help some people, but some people don’t really want the help, just the attention. And he reminds not to let “their” problem become “my” problem, because eventually it will become “our” problem. I have to admit it: he’s right!

So in the midst of a conversation this weekend with my love, one in which I asked his advice and “words of wisdom” about, he said something absolutely beautiful to me, and it’s what he said that prompted me to write this piece.

He said that while he can’t take away my hurt, he can “love me through it.”

What a simple, yet profound thing to say. We can’t fix anyone who’s hurting, but we can certainly be there for them to love them through it.

And I have to say, the hurt seems a bit less and the healing a bit easier when you’re blessed to have someone who will “love you through it.”

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~