“Opening the Right Door”

Did you ever wake up one morning only to realize that the situation or relationship you’re currently in just isn’t working? What was so wonderful for a time no longer holds those feelings; the good times are replaced with stress and drama, hurt and heartache.

We’ve all had a moment or two of that, yet what do we do?

We know that we want more and we deserve more, and we still hold onto the hope that the situation or relationship will change…but it doesn’t.

It’s served its’ time, taught you some lessons and made you realize that you were settling, and truth be told, it was holding you back.

There’s always some pain at the loss of something you thought was the right thing, yet I’m here to tell you that once you heal and get past those emotions, the world opens doors for you that you didn’t even know were closed.

Keeping negative things in your life, no matter what or who it is, will always keep out the good things just waiting to come into your life.

Love yourself enoughto know that you deserve all good things; wish the situation or person that you need to walk away from lots of love and light, and thank them for all that they taught you.

And let the next door open wide for you!

It’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

door

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“My Strength Is Their Weakness”

strength and weakness

I wrote that quote many years ago near the end of my 20 year marriage. As I began to heal physically and emotionally from all the turmoil of that, I realized that it was at my moments of anxiety, sadness or depression that he became strong. At first I thought he was showing true signs of kindness, yet in time I realized what was really happening: I was feeding his ego and he was starving my self-esteem.  He felt like “the big man” helping the poor, defenseless, broken woman. The woman HE broke. The woman he was abusive to; the woman he told over and over again was stupid and ugly; the woman he told would never be loved by anyone.

And I believed him…until I stopped believing him.

Are you wondering how I stopped believing all that negative stuff he had embedded onto my brain? I woke up. I realized that I had allowed him free reign over me for many years and that by doing that, the behavior continued. I allowed him to speak down to me and allowed him to be disrespectful to me.  So, one day I woke up and stopped allowing it, and the marriage was done and over with.

I went through years of healing myself mentally and emotionally, and of course it was with the help of many spiritual teachers and a wonderful tribe of true friends.

I learned so much about myself and that loving myself first was the answer to not allowing anyone else to treat me that way. You’d think it would never happen again, yet I’m human; we’re all human. Sometimes life brings you an experience that you thought you had learned the lessons from…yet life knows when you forget the lesson. And the Universe will put a similar experience back into your way until you wake up and realize that what you stopped allowing years ago, you’re allowing once again.

Even after that divorce I would find myself meeting someone whose ego was strengthened by my weakness, and for those that know me, they know I’m anything but weak. It would sporadically happen here and there throughout the years, yet know I’m much more able to recognize it when it’s happening. I’ve learned that those people lack control of their own life so they try and control mine; they lack self-respect and are unable to respect anyone else; they don’t feel strong unless they’re paired up with someone weak.

And I am no longer that girl.

I want to be treated the way I deserve and the way that I treat others: with love, kindness, compassion, consideration and loyalty. And I won’t settle for anything less. I want to be loved for the person I am, quirks and all, because I love that person that I’ve become.

We all have moments of feeling weak and that’s okay; it’s those moments that help us to find our strength again and stand back up on our feet even stronger.

We all have moments of finding ourselves back in a situation that we thought would never return and that’s okay; you’re given that situation to remind you of the lesson you forgot.

And we all find ourselves staring into the mirror, looking at ourselves and wondering how we got here and what happened to us, and that’s okay; keep looking in that mirror long enough and you’ll once again see the person you thought was lost.

It’s those moments of feeling lost that we’re actually finding ourselves again, and we’re finding an even better and stronger version of the person we once were.

Life is about balance and we all fall out of balance every so often. It’s when the world around us is spinning out of control that we see the truth of everything, and it’s those moments we find our balance again.

Don’t let anyone make you feel weak; surround yourself with people that make you strong.

Don’t spend your precious time feeding someone’s ego; spend your time feeding your self-esteem.

And don’t rely on anyone loving you the way you want to be loved; love yourself that way first and the rest will fall into place.

Everything in your life begins with YOU.

Stop allowing what you don’t want to continue.

Forgive yourself when you forgot a lesson you learned and get back on track.

And love yourself.

If you do nothing else, love yourself.

Everything is possible when you begin with love.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“The Lesson In The Pain”

I find a lesson in everything…even in pain, and the last 11 days have been no exception. I’ve been battling severe sciatica. Some days the pain has been excruciating, other days it’s been manageable, yet throughout the last 11 days of being able to do nothing but rest and take it easy, I’ve found myself changing.

Life and all its’ little problems were still knocking at my door, begging to come in with all their stress and drama, but guess what? I didn’t answer the door. I left all that “negative stuff” on the front porch, knowing that it would soon go away if I ignored it…and it did.

Living with pain is a horrible thing, yet it taught me that nothing else mattered except my healing. The pain reminded me that I’m just as important as anyone else, and that this time was mine to rest and get well. And it taught me to let go of things quicker and easier…and be done with them.

I guess you could say this amount of pain for this long of a time changed my behavior and perspective on situations that bring me stress or are filled with drama. I see them differently and learned to quickly dismiss them, not let them bother me, and focus on what’s important: my family, my loved ones, my tribe and ME!

I’m on the mend and it’s been a long, painful 11 days, yet it wasn’t in vain and was for a reason: to learn another life lesson. And while my leg still hurts, I can tell you that my heart doesn’t. I can’t worry about what I can’t change in others, I can only change how I react to them.

And sometimes “no reaction” is the best “reaction” to someone trying to bring their stress and drama into your life.

Try it.

It’s a good thing!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

“Round Two The Show – AirMax Day NYC”

“It’s turning imagination into reality. It’s taking an idea and it’s bringing it to life.” ~Sean Wotherspoon~

Of all the shows my nephew has been in, this one has to be my favorite. It’s “Round Two The Show – AirMax Day NYC!” I hope you take the time to watch it as he talks about the 2018 Nike AirMax shoe he designed and his entire NYC experience throughout the process.

It’s more than being his proud aunt, and proud is an understatement, but it’s about watching this young man believe so much in his dreams that he has done everything it takes to turn it into a reality…and with much success! He never stops dreaming or imagining or working towards turning all those into a reality. He believes that it’s all about taking an idea and bringing it to life!

Dreams turn into reality when you believe in the dream and in yourself. My nephew is such an inspiration to many, especially to me. I love that he’s a dreamer because I know firsthand what that feels like. And I know how excited he is about his dreams turning into his reality, because I’ve felt that emotion as well.

So here’s to all your dreamers out there…just believe, just have faith, everything else will fall into place! Take that leap of faith, believe in yourself and your dreams, and just go out and do it!

It’s a good thing!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

“What Now With New Beginnings”

“Journey is over, the battle is won. A new chapter starting, a new day begun, 

So what do I do know? Where do I start?

Do I take the road known or less traveled and follow my heart?

Life is always changing, it’s time to turn the page,

The story continues and it’s mine to create.

So what do I do now? Where do I go?

Do I let my mind lead me backwards in time or move ahead slow?”

What now with new beginnings? What now with the old life behind? What now that I’m starting over, no clue, no reason, no rhyme.

Time to change my thinking,

Time to lose the fear,

The Universe is watching, that’s what brought me here.

It’s all an adventure, my life is a song.

I know where I’ve been, not where I’m going but I’m dancing along.”

Aside from writing books, I also write song lyrics and this is one that I wrote about my journey with breast cancer. Yet it’s not only about that; it’s about endings and the beautiful new beginnings that follow. It’s about leaving the past behind and moving forward. It’s about creating the life you want. It’s about changing your perspective.  It’s about losing the fear and taking a leap of faith.

And it’s about embracing the journey of a beautiful new beginning.

It’s all an adventure so dance along the journey.

It’s a good thing!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“Actions Make The Words True”

Often times we take things for granted. We assume that the people we love know how we feel about them or how much we appreciate them. We assume that they know when we’re upset or that something they do bothers us. We assume that saying the words to them is enough…but it isn’t.

Assumptions. Nothing good ever comes out of them. It’s a breeding ground for misunderstanding, arguments and hurt feelings.

Words, on the other hand, can make a difference. Words communicate how we’re feeling to someone and  can prevent misunderstanding, arguments and hurt feelings.

Yet there’s something important about those words: you need  the actions to back them up because it’s those actions that make them true to the person you said them to.

Be mindful. Be compassionate. Be kind. Be understanding. Be willing to listen with an open heart and mind.

And be those things to the people you love.

And they’ll be all those things to you.

And never miss an opportunity to not only tell someone how you feel about them, but show them!

It’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“The Lesson In Disappointment”

A week from today I was supposed to fly to California. It’s a trip I’ve been looking forward to ever since I booked my flight over a month ago. Aside from my “happy place” at the Jersey Shore where I live, Malibu is my other “happy place.” The energy there is amazing and for some reason, I feel like I’m “home” when I’m there. Two years ago I spent a week in a Malibu beach house where I finished my book, “Waking Up.” I did some of my best writing there and it was an intense soul searching time for me as well. This trip was important to me, not only because I’d be in a place I love, but because I’d be seeing my oldest son (who I haven’t seen in over a year), my Nike Nephews and would be writing and working on another book.

Over the last few days my intuition was screaming to me: “It’s not the time to go.” And that thought stuck in my head for days. My sister called me two days ago and said that she had a bad feeling about me going and that I should go another time. She also told me to remember what I always say: Everything happens for a reason. And if there’s one thing I believe in with all my heart and one I tell others is this: trust your intuition because it never lies.

So yesterday morning I had to make an adult, big girl, responsible, smart decision…and they’re not the most fun to make. I cancelled my trip. And to say I was disappointed is an understatement, yet I knew in my heart it was the right thing to do. There were too many factors popping up in the last week and I knew days ago that I would have to decide whether to go or not. I don’t like when things get complicated and this trip was beginning to get more and more complicated.

I went to the hairdresser in the morning feeling disappointed and sad and I ran errands feeling disappointed and sad. Those feelings stuck with me all day, yet once I was in the comfort of my home the tears came. The tears started late in the afternoon and continued until I fell asleep. They came in waves over dinner, and came as sobs during my bath. There was nothing I could do to stop the tears; I felt sad, disappointed and broken and I kept wondering “Why did this happen to me?”

And then the answers came through the questions in the tears: because you needed to learn something….and I did.

I remembered what it is I always tell people, and when I heard Elizabeth Gilbert say it I had confirmation that it’s true: set your priorities, make boundaries around your sacred space, and learn to say no.

And that’s true…and I know that, yet I forgot that.

My lesson was that I had lost sight of my priorities, I was allowing people to cross my boundaries, and I was saying “yes” to things I should have been saying “no” to.

So yes, I had a day of sadness and disappointment, of feeling broken, but I knew I had to go through it and get through it and I did. My soul needed to cry long and hard to let go of what I was feeling.

I sit here this morning with a headache and swollen eyes, yet knowing I learned a lesson the hard way…and an important lesson at that.

My point to you is don’t feel badly for having a down day; they happen for a reason and that reason, more often than not, teaches you something that’s for your Highest Good. Sometimes it’s those “dark” days that enable us to see the “light.” Feel what you have to, learn the lesson, and let it go.

Sometimes our biggest disappointments teach us our greatest lessons.

And I’m good with that.

Because this is life…

And it’s a part of the journey. 

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

disappointment

“A Day At The DMV”

My driver’s license expired over the weekend and I spent two hours at the DMV yesterday renewing it. I could have renewed it by mail but I wanted to have a new picture taken for it. Sounds a bit vain, but my reason was this: my old picture was taken when I was going through breast cancer and my hair was just growing back in. The picture wasn’t horrible, but I’m a different person now and wanted to have a picture of the “me” without breast cancer on my license. May sound silly to some, but it was an important moment for me.

So while I was standing in line for hours I struck up a conversation with the woman in front of me. She was with her daughter, who had Down’s Syndrome. Margo was about 12 and one of the sweetest and smartest little girls I ever met. The three of us talked about diets, health, diabetes, my writing, where we lived (which is down the street from one another) and that Margo is going to be in the Special Olympics! It was a beautiful conversation between three strangers who were sharing their thoughts and emotions with each other.

And the one thing that stuck with me that Margo’s mom said was that she had worked her whole life and now spends her time with Margo and her friends. She said it’s the happiest time in her life because they’re all so sweet and innocent and that for the first time in her life she’s truly content.

You see, that’s the thing about sharing our lives with others, and I don’t mean telling them every personal detail of your life (although that’s okay too!). I’ve come to realize that when we take the time to talk to people we learn a bit about their story and I believe that everyone has a story, we just don’t always take the time to listen to it or even want to know it. As for me, I love people and I love listening to their story.

When we share our emotions and experiences with others we could actually be helping them through a bad day, or changing their perspective on a situation, or just letting them know they’re not alone. We all travel our own journey in this life, yet sometimes and more often than not, someone else’s journey can help us along ours. That’s what I love about being a writer: I can share my experiences with other’s and through that I get to meet some amazing people!

My day at the DMV put a smile on my face and made me realize that while we all have things to do and jobs to go to, it’s important to remember those “happy and content” moments in our lives. Sometimes it’s a stranger that helps us to remember that.

It’s time to make a difference in this world and we can all make that difference together.

Take a minute to say “hello” to a stranger today or tell them to have a good day. You may think that’s a small gesture but to the other person it may be the biggest and kindest gesture of their day.

Let’s do this together…

It’s a good thing. 

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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