“The Lost Art of Loyalty”

 

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While I was in Malibu last October finishing up my book, “Waking Up,” I was working on a short story about “loyalty.” I asked many people what it meant to them, and it soon became a topic that no one had a definitive answer for. In fact, a few people were annoyed when I asked their opinion; seemed it stuck in their mind and made them search for an answer; an answer that they could never find.

It also made them question the people in their life…and it made me question those in mine as well.

So what is loyalty? Does it have a different meaning for everyone? Do we make our own rules as to what loyalty is or is there a universal rule?

I start with my own loyalty. If you’re in my life and I love and care for you, I’ll always be loyal, unless you cross a boundary, in which case, I won’t strike back and become disloyal to you, I’ll simply walk away.

Next is the loyalty of those in my life. In healthy relationships of any kind, boundaries must be set for respect between each person. What bothers one person in the relationship may not bother another, yet communicating that to each other is key in the loyalty department. If you cross a boundary with someone in your life, you’ve just proved that you’re not loyal.

You see, “loyalty” is a tough one. The only answer I could get out of most people I spoke to about it was when they referenced the loyalty of a dog. A dog will always be loyal, yet my question made many wonder why humans can’t be the same.

We can, that is, if we choose to.

My loyalty lies with my love, my children, my family and my closest of friends. And that loyalty goesrecite-d597x1 beyond me; if you hurt those I love, my loyalty will have me walk out of your life as well. It doesn’t matter who you are.

Not many people are willing to do that. Many feel that it’s not their problem when someone hurts the ones’ you love; as long as they weren’t disloyal it’s okay. But is it? If someone intentionally hurts your child, or your spouse or significant other, why would you want to be a part of their life?

I think that’s where the confusion lies. I’ve been in that position before, where my loyalty was tested. It was a rough road between two people I care about, yet when push came to shove, my loyalty was with my love, not with the person who was hurting him. And I had to step out of that world with that other person, because my loyalty and my life is with him. Yes, feelings are hurt when you have to walk away from someone, yet in the end, it’s the right thing to do.

At least for me it was.

I know how important it is for me to be loyal to someone, and I believe I surround myself with those who feel the same about me. We attract what we put out there, and for anyone that knows me, they know I have their back. They know I’ll walk through fire for them, defend them, honor them, love them, protect them, and more importantly, I will walk away from anyone who hurts them. End of story.

“Loyalty” is much more than how you treat someone; it’s also about how other’s treat the people in your life and whether or not you accept that behavior. The choice is yours.

Is “loyalty” a lost art or have we forgotten the importance of it?

“Loyalty” is one of the strongest qualities in any relationship because it breeds trust and respect, and isn’t that what every good relationship should be built on?

Think about it.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

 

 

“Soup Season”

I love to cook, at least most days I do. There’s something therapeutic for me about the whole process of preparing, chopping, dicing, seasoning and cooking. The end result comes from serving it to those you love and seeing the expression on their face. Food fills the body and warms the soul.

There’s summer cooking, filled with grilling and summer salads, yet my absolute favorite cooking is when the leaves begin to change colors and the air turns cool. It’s “fall cooking” and I love that first day of turning on the oven and heating up the house with the comfort foods of fall.

It’s also that time of year that I call “soup season.” There’s nothing better than cooking a pot of soup served with warm bread. I love making soup, and I believe that love comes from my grandmother. I can remember many days at her house watching her put her big

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Potato Leek Corn Chowder

cauldron on the stove and fill the counter with every vegetable under the sun! I loved those days of helping her make soup and I’m confident that she taught me everything I know about the process. I’ve been nicknamed the “soup-meister” of my family because no one else makes it like I do, which is just how my grandmother made it.

It took her hours to make soup, and when it was done she’d fill up a million containers of it to give to all of our families. No one was ever left hungry when my grandmother made soup! She made many different types, yet when someone was sick, she went to task of making her “beef barley vegetable” soup, which she said was “good for what ails you!” I’m happy to say that it took me years to get my recipe to taste like hers, and while it’s not exactly the same, it’s close enough.

I once asked her what the key ingredient was in her soup, to which she told me: “It’s the love. Always put love into whatever you make.” And I’ve remembered that ever since.

When my kids were little and I baked cookies they’d tell me how good they were and that they could taste all the love in them. To this day, they still say that.

And now my love says that too; with every cup of tea or bowl of soup he tells me he can taste the love, and isn’t that what cooking is about? It’s filling the bellies of your loved ones with good food, and warming their hearts with how much you love them.

It’s definitely “soup season” at the Jersey shore, especially at my house, where everyone is coming down with colds. My love wants my “chicken and rice” soup, and my daughter’s request is for my  “potato leek corn chowder.”As far as my two vegan boys, they want good ‘ol “vegetable soup.” So many soups, yet I always find the time.

I will always find the time to take care of the ones’ I love, and any request for my soups is welcome. Today I’ll be in the kitchen with my own cauldron, just like my grandmothers’, firmly planted on the stove for the day. And in between stirring and simmering, I’ll be writing and making their “sick beds” more comfortable for them.  By tonight they will have all “tasted” the love when they ate, and will be “feeling” the love as they lay their head down on clean sheets, warm blankets and fluffed up pillows.

And I’ll end the night with a warm cup of green tea and honey for everyone…including me!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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Beef Barley Vegetable Soup with fresh baked French bread…as my grandmother said, “it’s good for what ails you!”

 

 

“Moving Forward”

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We all feel “stuck” at one time or another. It’s when you feel restless or bored, as if you’re missing out on something you should be doing, except that you can’t figure out what that something is. So you feel stuck. I’ve gone through it recently, and when I finally got myself “moving” again, I’ve been on fire! Now that’s a feeling I like!

I wanted to share this story of my experience of feeling stuck with you. It can be found in my book, “Waking Up: Lessons Learned Through My Adventures With Life and Breast Cancer.”

“Moving Forward”

I know of many people, myself included, that get so frustrated with life at times that all they seem to say is “I just can’t seem to move forward in my life. I feel like I’m stuck.”

And they are… stuck, that is.

I’ve been there, you’ve been there, we’ve all been there, yet I’ve learned through many teachers and situations that just because we “feel” stuck doesn’t necessarily mean that we “are” stuck. It only means that we are standing still, plain and simple.

No one is every really stuck; not me, not you, not anyone. We just feel that way at times simply because we’re standing still in the middle of what should be our past, not knowing how to move forward from it. There’s no science to it, yet it can be a difficult process, especially when you don’t realize what you need to move on from. On the other hand, you may be painfully away of why you’re stuck. The problem for you is that you don’t know how to move from the past, the person, or the situation.

It’s not always easy moving forward, especially when we’re leaving someone of something behind that is “comfortable.” Life is ever changing and the older we get, the more things change. No one ever said change was easy…or did they? Personally, I love change! I love the excitement of not knowing what’s coming next or where life is about to take me. It’s a nervous kind of excitement, yet what I know for sure is I couldn’t feel this way if I didn’t have faith. Without faith, there’d be nothing but fear, and no matter what life hands me, I refuse to allow fear into my thoughts or behaviors.

“With faith there is hope; with fear there is nothing.”

I’m not saying that fear doesn’t come into my thoughts once in a great while, but I will not and choose not to allow it to stay for long. I believe in the Law of Attraction in that what you think and believe is what you attract, and fear is no exception. Fear, in a mild dose, reminds us of how strong we really are because we are able to understand the fear and release it. We’re able to let it go. Trust me, you wouldn’t be normal if you weren’t afraid every so often. The problem you’ll have is if you stay in a constant state of fear. That’s something that will most assuredly hold you in your past and make you feel stuck.

Relationships, jobs, illnesses, you name it, fear can find it. Fear is normal, but nothing good comes from it. It brings anxiety, depression, illness and stress, to name a few, and fear is what plants our feet into the ground as if we’re dropped in cement and can’t move. Fear will keep you stuck; fear will prevent you from moving forward; fear will keep at you until you rid yourself of it. You may not think you’re strong enough to deal with ridding yourself of fear, yet you are.

“When you can’t find the strength, let the strength find you.”

Sometimes all you have to do is let go of the fear, and you’ll find yourself stronger than you had imagined. I believe strength is in all of us, and sometimes it takes a smack of fear, or a life changing moment to wake us up and realize that our strength was there all along. If you can’t find your strength, take a deep breath and let it find you. Trust me on this, it”s there, and I speak from experience.

You have to let go of the past in order to move forward, and that’s a fact. You can’t stay locked into the past and expect to move forward throughout this journey called life. Try viewing life as an adventure, with good and bad throughout it. Everything that happens to you has something to teach you about yourself. Make your life an exciting journey even amidst all the mundane tasks of the day. You don’t need a million dollars to do it and you don’t need to travel all over the world to find it; you need a mind and spirit that takes a stand for your life, makes it your own, views it as an exciting journey filled with adventure, and does what it takes to keep fear at bay.

If you can do these things, you’ll be amazed at all that life has to offer. Miracles happen, dreams are fulfilled, and life is truly lived when you change your perspective. No one can change it for you; it’s all up to you! It’s your choice; better yet, it’s your change…a change for anything and everything you want! Take those fears and face them head on with strength, determination and faith that all things along the road of your life’s journey are happening just as they should.

“Make your life an adventure…”

THE END

I hope you enjoyed this story and that if you’ve been feeling stuck, this may have helped you get past it.

All I know is that when I’m moving forward I’m at my best, loving life and all it has to offer, and making a mark in my life. Stuck is a feeling I try to stay away from, or at least not allow it to stay to long when it arrives.

Move forward, my friends!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“Drawing A Line In The Sand”

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Boundaries. I know all about them , write about them, and understand their purpose. Yet, I find myself having allowed boundaries to be crossed…. MY boundaries, that is. It happened without warning, yet it happened. I should have known that the feelings I’ve had in the last few months were my own fault, because I had set boundaries and allowed them to be crossed.

I don’t know if I’m more angry at myself for allowing it to happen or if I’m more upset with the person who crossed them. I was open and honest about my boundaries with them, yet somehow they got lost in the every day business of life and relationships.

Truth is, I have a hard time saying “no” and learning to do this, when it’s for my best interest, is a work in progress. I don’t like confrontation, and I don’t want to hurt someone’s feelings, especially when it’s someone I love. Yet I missed one very important piece to this puzzle:

“Why did I allow MY feelings to be hurt and why was I more concerned over someone I love when I should be loving myself just the same?”recite-1kfn7mb

Truth…an awakening…a slap of reality. Yes, yet another “waking up” moment for me, and I don’t like it. I allowed boundaries to be crossed that upset me, hurt me, and messed with my health. And I wonder if the other party knows this, because they should.

Everyone handles things their own way. Things that upset me may not bother someone else. Yet aren’t we supposed to respect and understand each others’ feelings? If someone tells us they react to something a certain way, shouldn’t we accept that as their truth? Or that perhaps they’re telling us that so we don’t hurt them?.

This was a difficult one for me to figure out, and it took longer than it usually does. I’m intrigued by what makes people tick, and that includes myself. I always tell my love that I’m probably one of the few people he knows that really knows herself well, and that includes my faults and my strengths. I’ll admit when I’m wrong, and ask for understanding of him when I need it. (Sometimes I think I make it too easy for him…what he can’t figure out about me I tell him! LOL!)

So, now what?

First, I need to forgive myself, because I’m mad that I allowed this to happen.

Second, I need to put the boundaries back in place, although the hurt and damage from them  being crossed is already done.

And third, I need to take a cold, hard look at my life to see what’s working and what’s not.

Why did I allow the lines in the sand to be crossed? Who and what is my priority? How did this mishap of crossing boundaries affect my family and my life?

Lines in the sand…that was my problem. I should have set a solid foundation of cement for the boundary. I thought I had, but sometimes when we worry more about someone else we lose sight of what’s best for us, and more importantly, we lose sight of ourselves.

And I’m guilty of that. And life is going to change. And feelings will be hurt.

Yet out of all of this, I know with all my heart that more wonderful things will come out of this lesson! Hearts will bond stronger, relationships will grow and flourish, and life will go on…even better than it was before the boundaries were crossed.

It’s a life lesson, and as much as I write about it, it’s a lesson I needed to learn. The Universe whacked me once again, waking me up to something important: I stopped looking out for my well being and what was good for me, even though I knew that someone else was causing me pain.

It wasn’t a mistake or something done out of malice, because I accept that it’s yet another lesson, another blessing, and another story to be shared to help and teach someone else.

Boundaries are not meant to be controlling tools; they are tools to protect us and let other’s know that we are to be respected. They are the simplest of ways to let someone know that what they do, what they say, or what they want, is not necessarily for OUR highest good… sometimes it’s just for theirs.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

 

 

 

 

 

“The Naked Truth About Being Naked”

I wanted to share one of my stories from my book, “Waking Up: Lessons Learned Through My Adventures With Life and Breast Cancer.” Hope you enjoy it!

“The Naked Truth About Being Naked”

Most people I know have a Bucket List. It’s that little list we carry in our mind of all the things we want to do before we die. It’s also that list of things that we want to do, but all too often, are afraid to do. We make excuses of not having the time to do it, or we simply don’t’ think it’s important enough to do. At this stage of my life it’s my list of “do it and get it done!” So now I’m doing as much as I can and regretting nothing!

Life is short enough, isn’t it? why fantasize about what we want to do? Why just carry a list in our mind? Shouldn’t we all have the freedom to be who we are? there’s no such thing as an “alter ego” in us. It’s just our “true self” coming out!

So, I went on a vacation. Some called it spontaneous, reckless, and even selfish. I called the seait a much needed fun and a matter of survival! Truth be told, it was more fun than I had imagined, and I did manage to knock quite a few things off my Bucket List! It was my alter ego in full swing…literally. It was and still is, the “real” me, and I couldn’t be happier with the person I found and allowed myself to become.

When finding the true you inside, there are times we must find the true you on the outside. In my case, I bared it all: body and soul. It was quite an experience and the most comfortable, content feeling I have felt in years with my own body, and of course, my own soul. No more speaking in code to those of you who haven’t figured it out yet: I went to a nude beach. Not just once, or even twice, but every single day of my vacation. The truth is, I loved it! It was freedom at its’ best: no hiding, no shame or embarrassment involved. It was, simply put: wonderful!

There were many people on that beach, all sizes and shapes, all comfortable in their own skin, which helped to make me more comfortable in mine. The first day on the beach I stuck to my chair, allowing myself to get to know the lay of the land. I sat people watching and getting used to this new found freedom. By the second day, and every day thereafter, I was up and about walking around, talking to everyone else there. Strangely enough, new friends were made, and there was quite the camaraderie among us all. I stepped into the world of nakedness, holding the most fun and intriguing conversations with other naked people. I wondered how I’d feel when I was home and had to step OUT of nakedness. The greatest part of it all is that no one seems to notice that anyone IS naked. The funniest part was seeing them out at night and noticing that they WEREN’T naked!

In the world of “clothed” people, you can tell a lot about them by what they’re wearing, how their hair look, even by the jewelry they have on. The status of their life is blatantly worn on them. On a nude beach, however, there is not status to be seen. There’s no way to look at someone and know much about them at all, except that they’re as free-spirited as you. That’s the beauty of it, you simply get to know them by talking to them, not by looking at them.

I worse my new bathing suit the day before I came home for less than an hour. It felt invasive to be so “covered” up after having been so “exposed,” yet there are times when we have to conform and accept the ways of the “real” world. We have to wear clothes!

Vacation is over, the beach I fell in love with is now a million miles away, but the experience will live within me for a lifetime! When the weather is dreary, or the day getting rough, I just closed my eyes and let my thoughts wander back to that wonderful trip, and that time on the beach where I could truly be myself. I loved the “naked truth” of that because it brought out more of the “naked truth” about me.

THE END

I hope you enjoyed the story; it brought me back to those memories as I wrote this for you and reminded me that so often, we judge someone by their appearance and their material possessions. And we shouldn’t.

You don’t have to go to a naked beach to understand the concept of “labeling” others and making an unfair judgement about them; you need to expose your true self to them, allowing them to share their true self with you.

You can be “naked” without taking your clothes off; it’s all a matter of standing in your truth.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

You can purchase a copy of my book, “Waking Up: Lessons Learned Through My Adventures With Life and Breast Cancer” at any Barnes & Noble store, or on-line at amazon.com or barnesandnoble.com.

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“Be The One Who Dares”

 

It seems to me that in this crazy world today, most people don’t want to “be the one who dares;” they’d rather someone else do the job! Yet, being someone who dares is quite an honor; it’s your gift of the right to be who you are, to excel at what you do, to make a change in the world, and to be “the one who dares.”

If you’re wondering what that means, then I’ll tell you my version, or opinion, of that…so here goes:

“Be the one who dares to…”14519653_315906848769234_232567940091283103_n

~Be different than all the rest

~Take a risk and a chance on something better

~Be a dreamer

~ Be a lover, not a fighter

~Be friend, not a matter of convenience

~Take a chance on love, even though you’ve been hurt

~Laugh even though your heart is hurting

~Remember the love of the ones you’ve lost, rather than cry bitter tears over missing them; cry with joy over having known them and loved them.

~Not care what other people think of you, but rather, of what you think of yourself

~Look in the mirror at yourself and know you did the best you could today.

~Dance in the worst of times, and dance in the best

~Stop and smell the roses, even though you have a million other things to do

~Say “I love you” as often as you can

~Accept that you are “perfect” for just the way you are

~Take a leap of faith in yourself

~Step out of your comfort zone

~Who removes toxic people and situations from your life, so that all that you deserve and want can come in

~And most importantly, be the one who dares to love yourself the most!

What about you? How would you fill in the blanks to “be the one who dares to_________? I’d love to hear what you have to say!

As always, I’m wishing you love and light, but today I also want to challenge you to “be the one who dares,” because I know that you can!

And I’ll “be the one who dares to say that I believe in all of you!”

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“Bulk Day”

 

I spent all day yesterday cleaning out my garage…not an easy task. My love moved in over a year ago, and the containers of tools and Rubbermaid containers of his stuff was still riddled all over, along with remnants of my babies childhood…and with too many memories of the past. I started the job at 8 in the morning, and was still at it by 3! And still there’s more to do!

My two boys spent over an hour hauling stuff to the curb for “bulk day” today, yet as I sat on my front porch with my coffee this morning, I was looking at the pile.

And the memories came flooding back…

And I wondered if I should bring some of it back in…

The one item I keep looking at is my yard swing. It’s over 15 years old, survived two marriages and their divorces, and had a happy life at my prior house that overlooked “my lake.” The kids and I lovingly called it “the sleeping swing” because anyone that sat on it eventually fell asleep, even the animals!

And so the memories of “the sleeping swing” are overtaking my thoughts, and I’m remembering bottle feeding our cat on it when the kids first brought him home, rocking my two youngest to sleep on it, and envisioning all those I love piled onto it.

I remember my kids and my nieces and nephews all piled on it for a group picture for the sleepinggrandparents; I remember my son and his friends hanging out on it in high school, sharing all their stories with me; I remember that swing being my serenity spot at night when everyone went to sleep; and I remember it always being a source of comfort for my kids and I, and anyone else who needed to be outside and find peace.

Yet sadly, the swing didn’t do as well at this house. It lost its’ protection of a roof from my old house, and as much as we tried to keep it covered during a rainstorm, the waters still leaked in, and soon enough, my beige swing was turning green with mold. No matter the effort we put into it to wash it and clean it, nothing seemed to work.

So yesterday we made the decision to say good-bye and put it at the curb. And here I sit, wondering if I should bring it back in.

I keep reminding myself that the memories stay with us much longer than an item does; and that the past is the past, and there’s such a time to let it go and say good-bye.

And I know, this is one of those times. It was so easy to toss it out yesterday, and much more difficult this morning seeing it out at the curb. My love told me he’ll go get it and bring it in, if that’s what I want, or we can get a new one next year.

As hard as it is to see it go, getting a new one to fit with this new life is how it should be. The “sleeping swing” holds memories that I share with my children and a life I had prior to this relationship, and I’m a big believer in letting the past go so that I can move forward.

So, good-bye to our “sleeping swing,” and much love and gratitude to you for over 15 years of peace and serenity…and now to look forward to next summer when we buy our new one.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“It’s Right In Front of You”

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In this crazy world today, there are so many people looking for something more than what they have. They lose sight of what’s in front of them, and instead, look around and away from it and gaze out into the side. You know that old saying:”you don’t know what you had until it’s gone.” And it’s true.

It’s sad that so many people today just don’t get it. They could be in a perfectly good relationship,  yet as time marches on, the thrill and excitement become stagnant. And that’s their own fault because rather than focus on what’s right in front of them, they go looking to the side for something else. When they find that something else, they start comparing the “outside” to “what’s in front of them.” And I can tell you that doing that will end a relationship more quickly than you can imagine.

The reality is that in any relationship the emotions change as time passes, but that doesn’t mean that you need to lose sight of the passion you felt from the beginning. You’ve left the “honeymoon” phase and entered a more content, peaceful phase. And that’s fine, yet that can easily turn into someone feeling that they are being taken for granted. And no one wants to feel less than who they are; no one wants to feel as if they don’t matter; and no one wants to feel as though they aren’t loved anymore.

Relationships change with time, and my biggest teacher was my two marriages and divorces and an extremely hurtful relationship. I learned through all of them that it takes two people to begin something, and two people two end it. I don’t believe that it’s always a 50/50 partnership; there are times that one person has to give more than the other, and vice versa. And I learned that when you lose sight of what’s in front of you and start looking at what’s on the outside, the relationship is almost over.

And there’s usually no coming back from that. Once the damage is done, it’s done.

“Everything if forgivable but not always repairable.”

We seem to live in a world today where everything has to be perfect, always be exciting, and always be larger than life! But you know what? It never will be all those things all the time. Sometimes the most mundane, small things are actually the biggest things in a relationship. Sometimes it’s just a look into someone’s eyes or a touch of the hand that make you heart melt. It’s that last kiss goodnight before you close your eyes and the first thing you say in the morning to each other before you get out of bed. It’s the arms that know exactly when and how to wrap themselves around you to make you feel safe or comfort you when you’re sad. It’s the laughter of shared memories and silly jokes. It’s the deep, heartfelt conversations that take you one step further into a deeper relationship and understanding of who each of you are.

Small…mundane…but more precious than gold.

Relationships are like the ocean, sometimes rough, sometimes calm, yet always in motion. It’s a matter of weathering the storm until you can float on smooth waters. But the point is that you do it together.

Love isn’t complicated; it’s people who make it that way. Love is respecting each others’ feelings and embracing the differences. Love is wanting to be together, yet knowing when to give each other space. Love doesn’t clip your wings, it gives you the strength to fly. Love is the greatest gift between two people, and if you’re lucky enough to find love, always look directly at it, not off to the side.

Some people just like the idea of “love” and miss out on the reality of true love. And that’s how they lose sight of what’s in front of them; what they thought was love really wasn’t because true love doesn’t die, doesn’t wither away, and doesn’t become boring. True love grows by looking at it directly and not looking away.

Take a moment today to look at what’s right in front of you and stop searching for something better “off to the side.” Pay attention to the gift of love you share with someone, because while it may not always be perfect, it will always be “love.”

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“When The Truth Is Revealed”

 

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It’s a sad day when someone or something you believed to be one thing turns out to be something completely different…and it rocks your world. And it breaks your heart.

Yet it happened to teach you something about yourself.

Maybe your were too trusting; maybe you didn’t look closely enough at them; maybe the rush of exciting emotions clouded your judgement…or maybe you made them into something that they never really were. And you did that because you wanted to believe in them; you wanted to believe in it all.

I’m a writer, and I have to say that sometimes I wonder if I’m writing “my life” the same as when I’m writing a book or short story. Maybe I write my life to look perfect, be perfect and feel perfect, when in reality, it’s my way of avoiding the truth of someone or something. It’s a dangerous realization when you begin to wonder if it’s real…or if it’s simply the dream of something you’ve always wanted.

It’s happened to me more times than I can count in the last few years, and with each realization comes the ending of a friendship or relationship that I was finally able to see the truth about.

And on the day that those realizations came to fruition, so broke my heart; my emotions felt a level of hurt so great that it took my breath away; and the dream of “what was” turned into the nightmare of “what never was.”

Yet I survived it. I picked myself up, and took all those broken pieces of my heart and soul and began to put them back together. I searched the deepest part of my soul to understand why it happened, and find the lesson it was meant to teach me.

I’m still picking up the pieces that were shattered and am learning to distance myself from the people and situations that shattered them in the first place. I’me learning to set up boundaries in my life, and not allow other’s to cross them. I’m finding that “my strength is their weakness, and my weakness is their strength.” And I’m finding that I need to learn to trust other’s when they’ve earned that trust; and that those who lie, deceive and manipulate me are no one that is welcome in my world.

I’m not the only one who goes through this; in fact, I know several people in my life struggling with the same thing: that what they believed to be true had never been true at all.

So often we feel humiliated when this happens, but the truth is that we shouldn’t. Why feel something negative for being kind and compassionate or trusting and loyal? It’s just a lesson, my friends, and a hard one at that, yet with faith in ourselves we can learn from it and move on, stronger than ever.

Don’t beat yourself up for someone else’s shortcomings or hurtful behavior; forgive them, let them go, and move on.

And forgive yourself, because YOU have done nothing wrong.

You simply believed them to be something more than what they were, and they allowed you to see that they weren’t.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~