“Scenes From An Italian Deli”

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“It’s time to make a difference, and we can make a difference together.”

~Anne Dennish~

I had a book signing today at my local Italian deli, Valente’s. It was a cold, rainy day, yet the owner and staff were wonderful to my love and I.

However, it wasn’t the amount of books sold that stuck with me today…it’s what happened as I was leaving, and I want to share this beautiful story with all of you.

There was a table of gentleman sitting across from me, and they were there for quite some time. They kept looking over and were probably wondering what this book was all about, yet they didn’t stop by to see me… until I was leaving.

This sweet gentleman came up to me and asked what the book was about. I told him it was about the lessons I’ve learned through my life and breast cancer. He smiled and told me he has a rare cancer, but was fortunate to be in an experimental trial which is keeping him alive. Others with this same cancer had passed long before him. Soon, his friend joined in the conversation, and we exchanged our stories of chemo, treatments, hospitals, side effects and survival!

I reached my hand out to formally introduce myself to him, and with that, he outstretched his arms and consumed me in a beautiful bear hug. He told me to keep writing, stay healthy, and survive. I told him the same. I couldn’t help but feel such a connection with another person battling cancer. He smiled as he said goodbye, and wished me well.

That stands out more in my mind than the books I signed today. My story made a difference, and his story made a difference to me.

Please remember to be kind, to take a moment to listen to someone who needs to talk, and share your “waking up” moments with others.

After all: “It’s time to make a difference, and we can make a difference together.”

And today, at an Italian deli, a difference was made.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

Author of “Waking Up: Lessons Learned Through My Adventures With Life and Breast Cancer”

Available at Barnes and Noble.com and Amazon.com

your move

“You Had A Bad Day”

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A tone in the voice, a look of the eyes, and a distinct difference in the body language… yes, you’ve just been part of someone’s bad day.

It happens all too often, but the trick is to understand the behavior and realize that it has nothing to do with you.

We get frustrated, angry, or annoyed, and when we feel those negative emotions, it’s the people around us, which are usually the one’s we love the most, who feel it as well. Your unhappy mood can affect someone else’s good mood…but only if they let you.

You see, negative emotions bring negative reactions and responses, and if I’m wrong on this, please let me know. Positive brings positive; negative brings negative. Pretty simply concept, isn’t it? Yet, life get’s to us all now and again, and we feel some negative things, but don’t feel them too long. Take a breath, and think about why you feel that way…and if you’re the recipient of the bad mood, understand that it’s nothing you’ve said or done; it’s their fear, insecurity or unhappiness with themselves, not you.

If I find myself on the other end of someone’s “bad mood,” I’ll only allow myself about 30 seconds to hang my head and feel badly about it…yes, it does make me feel bad, but as soon as those 30 seconds pass, I say to myself: “It’s their bad day, not mine. If I can help them, I will. If they just need to vent, I’ll listen. But no, I’m not taking the blame for their feelings.”

I know, sounds easy, and it’s not always that easy. But this is where your “love of self” is so important! We can’t control another person’s behavior, but we can control what we allow: our feelings, our responses, and our tolerance.

Life isn’t perfect and neither are we. We all have a bad day once in awhile, but the important thing is this: don’t take it out on someone else. That “someone else” just may be the one to help and love you out of that bad mood.

So, on with the day, my friends. Stay strong, stay positive,and know that you are in complete control of your own actions and emotions. In the end, bad moods don’t last forever, and as the saying goes: “Don’t sweat the small stuff!”

Wishing you love, light and a happy mood,

~Anne Dennish~

life is too short

“Dancing in the Light!”

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I was raised to grow up, get married, and live happily ever after…yet that theory was proven wrong twice to me when the divorces were final. Yet today, I find myself doing something very foreign to me: I’m living with the love of my life. No wedding, no ring, just our commitment to one another.

Here’s an excerpt from my story, “The Ultimate Test of Trust:”

“Cancer didn’t scare me nearly as much as falling in love for the first and last time in my life. It didn’t happen easily for us, as we both began this relationship as deeply wounded souls. Our hearts had been broken to the point that neither of us thought we’d love again, that perhaps all these wonderful things we hear about love are simply written in books. Yet we learned to trust one another because we knew if we didn’t, we’d be nothing.”

And you know what the ultimate test of trust is? It’s “love.”

Love for your spouse, your significant other, your family and friends, even your children. Love teaches us to trust. Yes, we’ll fall every so often into an insecure or fearful place; most times it’s nothing to worry about, but simply a piece of us that’s out of balance, allowing a negative force to take hold.

But remember, those “dark” moments come as sporadic lessons to teach us something about ourselves, and they are moments we shouldn’t stay in for too long. Grab the lesson and move out of the darkness and into the light!

“There is no dancing in the dark, only in the light.”

Embrace all the love that surrounds your life each and every day. Let yourself pass the ultimate test of trust!

“After all, there’s no love to be found in the dark, only in the light…”

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

Fits Like a Glove 1 

 

 

“The Voice of the Ocean”

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In my book, “Waking Up,” I wrote a story called “The Voice of the Ocean.” And I can remember how it came to fruition…
 
I was sitting in a dear friends house in Malibu, right on the beach. It was the most beautiful, peaceful, serene space I could have possibly in. She let me stay at her house so that I could finish the book, yet that week there proved to be so much more to me. It was actually another “waking up” moment, because, while I did finish the book, it turned into a major soul searching time there.
 
It’s funny how much time you have to think when you’re alone, and even though I was writing throughout the days and nights, I was alone with my thoughts… and the sounds of the ocean. And the sounds of the ocean turned into the “voice of the ocean,” filled with messages and waking up moments.
 
The greatest thing I learned out there was this:
 
“That I loved more than I allowed myself to be loved; that because I’ve not given someone else a chance to prove that they can love me as well as I can love them, I couldn’t feel it. I feel it now.”
 
Wow, what a moment that was… to realize that I was still carrying a fear of having my heart broken and my soul hurt. I realized in that one moment that while I can love well, I never allowed someone else the chance to love me the same. Everything changed in that awakening moment. All the walls around my heart that I thought were gone, suddenly crumbled. And life has been amazing ever since.
I’ll be forever grateful for that time in Malibu, because it changed my life, and I love when my life changes for the better. We are all works in progress and constantly learning more about ourselves every day… that is, if we allow it.
 
Listen to your intuition, follow your heart, and get that “fear” out of your world. I’m telling you this: life and love is a leap of faith, in yourself and others. Take the leap and land in love!
Wishing you love and light,
~Anne Dennish~
my malibu

Another “waking up” moment for me in Malibu!

“The Bully Free Zone?”

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“Bullies:” they’re not just for kids anymore!

Every time I walk into my sons’ school, I see the large banner hanging across the hallway that says: “Bully Free Zone.” And I have to wonder…is anyplace really a bully free zone?

I know there’s bullies everywhere, and it doesn’t pertain simply to children. Adults can be the most ruthless bullies in the world, except we choose to call them by other names (and I’ll leave those words up to you!) Yet the bottom line is this: adult bullies are mean, they’re spiteful, and they do as much damage emotionally to another adult as a child bully does to another child.

Yet I’ve learned one thing about these types of people: they act that way because of their own insecurities and fears; they can’t find their own power and control, so they subject others to it. No, it’s not fair, it’s hurtful, and yes, sometimes even painful. But I’ve noticed throughout the years of one thing that will stop them in their tracks: your strength.

“My strength is their weakness; my weakness their strength.”

That’s right, the moment you become weak and allow them the control to treat you badly is the very moment they become strong. Watch the difference in their behavior towards you when you stand up for yourself and are strong.

Experience has taught me that this is true; walk away from the “bullies” in the world; send them love and light, keep them in your prayers, and walk away. They have their own lessons to learn about themselves, and until they’re willing to do that, their life will never be anything that they want it to be. They’re losing out on love and happiness, and all good things.

Listen, you don’t have to allow someone to treat you badly; you choose who you are surrounded by. Keep a healthy, positive, and loving “vibe in your tribe.”

Here’s a little food for thought: maybe your “strength may be their weakness,” yet it may also be the message for them that no one else has ever said to them. In fact, you showing them what love and respect for oneself and for others’ looks like may be a perfect way to make a difference in their life.

It’s time to make a difference, and we can make a difference together.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

strength and weakness.jpg

“The Power of Words”

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Words are very powerful, and you don’t need to be a writer to know that. Yes, writer’s can write a story which allows the reader to feel certain emotions, be it the suspense and fear from a thriller or happiness and joy from an inspirational story. It’s a blessing to be a writer…

It’s also a blessing to be a decent human being. Writers may write words that make you feel something, but as human beings every word we speak to someone else is as powerful as putting it on paper.

Sure, you write a book and it becomes immortal, yet so do the words you speak everyday. They just don’t happen to be on paper… they embed themselves into someone’s mind.

Speak harshly and negatively to someone and they will remember it for the rest of their life, even after they’ve forgiven the person who said it. The wrong words hurt the soul of the recipient, bruises their heart, and takes up residence in their mind.

I always told my children that once they said something nasty or negative to anyone, those words would be out there for eternity. Gone, but never forgotten.

You remember that old saying: “If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all?” Well, it’s true. Even at my age, I can still remember negative things that were said to me throughout my life…I’ve forgiven who said them, I’ve gotten strong enough to ignore them and not let them directly influence my life, but I’ve never forgotten what they said or who said it.

Be kind, with your words and your actions. If you’re having a bad day or aren’t happy with your life, don’t put that on someone else. Look inside yourself and know that you are in control of YOU, not anyone else. If you’re unhappy, change it. Don’t take out your fears and unhappiness on someone else, because that person may actually be someone that can be of help to you.

Choose your words carefully today and everyday. Don’t think about negative things, because you’ll only attract that into your life. Think positive, live positive, and positive people, places and things will come into your life. I’m living proof that this is true.

Wishing you love, light and beautiful words,

~Anne Dennish~

abuse

“Waking Up Moments”

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I had a conversation with my love yesterday about what a “waking up” moment is… and I realized that some might not know what it truly means. So, let me explain…

A “waking up” moment is that moment of clarity that can bring you to your knees when you realize you’re not living the life you deserve or want. Yes, it does take but one moment to find yourself “waking up,” yet we are meant to have many of those moments throughout our lifetime. It depends on your age at the time, your relationships, even your job.

It’s that moment you suddenly ask yourself: “What the hell am I doing? Why am I doing this to myself? How do I change this?” There you go, you’ve “woken up” to the reality of your life and your truth. And in that moment you were just gifted the choice to change it all!

I’ve had many “waking up” moments, yet breast cancer was the most powerful. It changed my life in ways I hadn’t thought possible, yet all for the best. I’m living proof of what a “waking up” moment can do for you… it can bring a miracle!

A “waking up” moment stops you in your tracks, makes you think, and hands you the lessons you need to find your truth and the joy you so deserve.

What was a “waking up” moment for you? I’d love to hear what helped you along the way, and I’m sure other’s would love to know as well. Share your story with me today, because “it’s time to make a difference, and we can make a difference together!”

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

waking up moment

“When Cancer Wakes You Up”

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My new book, “Waking Up: Lessons Learned From My Adventures With Life and Breast Cancer” was born over two years ago while lying on a radiation table for breast cancer.

I’m the type of person that loves meeting people, because every single one of us has a story…we ARE a story! Some may not believe that, yet as a writer, I know it’s true. I was out to dinner with my love last night, along with his cousin and his love, and a table full of people I had never met. Yet by the end of the night, I knew them well.

You see, that’s the beauty of paying attention to people and speaking to them, yet more importantly, LISTENING to them. They were laughing at me last night when I said that the whole night of conversations was indeed a story!

So it’s no surprise that “Waking Up” was born; the idea may have begun on a radiation table, yet the stories were already taking shape in my mind, and for the last two years of writing it, more stories were born. Every story is true; most of them are of my personal experience, and there’s a few born out of situations with someone else that  I was involved with, who graciously allowed me to write about it.

Yet, here’s what that one moment that woke me up was: “breast cancer!”

Yes, I had been on a spiritual journey for years, but finding out I had cancer was a big kick in the ass! I realized that as much as I had learned over the years, the lessons were far from over. Breast cancer changed my life and how I live it. That tumor was all the things I never said out loud, all the pain of allowing people to treat me badly. It was everything I never said that I should have, so I made a deal with the cancer: I’ll open my mouth and use my voice, I’ll make better choices of who I surround myself with, I’ll rid myself of people and situations that me feel less than good, and I’ll take all of this and write about it to help someone else as long as you leave my body when the time is right.

I guess the cancer agreed with the deal, because it held up its’ end of the bargain…I did all those things and it left me the day they cut all that stuff out of my body. They did more than a lumpectomy on February 21st…as cancer and I were about to say good-bye that day, I could hear it speaking to me. Sounds crazy, but it wasn’t really. It said: “You’ve done the work and I know it wasn’t easy. I’m sorry to have had to come and visit you, but this journey is over. Remember the lessons, remember to love yourself, and finish up our deal: tell your lessons to everyone you can reach. I’m counting on you.”

Well, in a strange way, chemo may have healed my cancer, but my cancer healed me. It taught me more than I could imagined, and since then, I spread the word, I keep out as much drama and stress as I can, and I walk away from anyone or anything that tries to control and manipulate me. Cancer didn’t abuse me as much as some people have tried to, and I’m smarter because of all of it.

“Waking Up” is so much more than a book; it’s my heart and soul that simply wants to make a difference in someone’s life. Life get’s shorter as we get older, and my goal is to live everyday to the fullest, to show love and kindness to someone who needs it, and most importantly, to make someone laugh and smile.

Struggles will always happen in our lives, yet it’s your attitude and perspective that will handle it and teach you more than you could have ever imagined. Love your lessons, whether you like them or not, because in the end, miracles happen!

“Just believe, just have faith, and all good things will fall into place.”

Enjoy the journey and allow yourself to “wake up,”

~Anne Dennish~

choice and chance

Author of “Waking Up: Lessons Learned Through My Adventures With Life and Breast Cancer”

copyright 2016

Available at Amazon.com, Barnes and Noble.com, and Xlibris.com

 

 

“Ride The Wave!”

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Life is like an ocean, and we’re continually riding the waves of it. Sometimes it’s calm, and sometimes it’s rough, yet we have a choice to ride it the best we can. And with that ride, all things are possible, and we all have the ability to “rock the world!”

What wave are you riding today? Are you on calm seas or 16 foot waves? No matter what it is, I have faith in you…you can do it! Life isn’t always easy, or “smooth sailing,” yet you’ll be all the stronger and smarter once you get through it all.

Embrace the waves you’re riding, because they’ve been gifted to you with the ability to ride them in the best possible way! It’s your choice! Now go out there today and “rock the world!”

ride the wave

Wishing you love and light, and calm seas ahead!

~Anne Dennish~

Author of “Waking Up: Lessons Learned Through My Adventures With Life and Breast Cancer”

copyright 2016

“Joy”

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“Joy.” I love that word, and up until a year ago had never used it much, actually, never used it at all! Sure, I’d say I was happy, but I’ve realized that “joy” is that one word that surpasses it all! “Joy” is a combination of happiness, gratitude, and that incredible feeling of knowing that you’re blessed.

As life changed after breast cancer and throughout this past year, I found myself feeling more than happy. It was during a reiki session with my spiritual teacher, Bobbi Torres, that she asked me what I was feeling. In a split second I answered her: I’m feeling “joy!” I realized at that moment that a word that was so foreign to me suddenly felt like home.

I had gone from happy to joyful, and at that moment I suddenly understood what “tears of joy” was all about, because I certainly shed a million. I sat for hours before my book

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Tears of joy as my dream had come true!

signing this past Saturday with tears flowing off and on. My nearest and dearest kept asking me why I would be crying on such an exciting and important day. My answer was simple: I’m crying because my dream came true, I’m crying over the immense amount of gratitude I’m feeling, I’m crying at how incredibly blessed I am, and I’m crying because I am feeling “joy!”

“Joy” is happiness, love, gratitude, blessings and peace all wrapped up in one, and my wish for all of you is to find your “joy” today! Embrace it, let it become part of you, share it with others, and let the “tears of joy” flow! It’s a great combo…why not try it? My guess is that you’ll realize that joy will feel like “home” to you as well.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

joy