truth

“Three Sides To Every Story”

/ Anne Dennish / Leave a comment

My mother always said that “there’s three sides to every story, yours, mine and the truth.” And she’s right. There are three sides to each of our stories and I’ve learned from experience to believe the story that lies in the middle of your version and mine: “the truth.”

Sometimes we get so caught up in the emotions that are swirling around in our minds that we lose sight of the truth. We tell our story to whoever will listen, hoping that they’ll be on “our” side, not “their” side. We’re hoping for confirmation that we aren’t guilty of anything, that the other person is. And we’re hoping that telling others our version will make it the truth. It doesn’t.

The real truth lies out there in the middle. It’s one thing to tell your story to friends and family for support, which would be the right reason. It’s another thing to tell it for sympathy and to talk badly of the other person, which is the wrong reason. There’s enough hurt swirling around. You don’t need the opinions of others to keep it going. After all, they’re not living in your “truth,” they’re just hearing it from you.

Everyone has their own “version” of their situation, but when you get to the real heart of the matter, when you take your own accountability and when you forgive yourself and the other person, then you will have found the right version: the truth. It’s not always easy to face the truth, but it’s an important piece of healing and moving forward in your life. No one knows your “truth” but you. Be careful who you share it with.J ust my thoughts…Have a wonderful day.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“The Stepping Stones Into 2020”

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It seems to me that the year of 2019 has been a rough one for so many. I’ve heard more people talk about all the negative things that have happened to them. Most people are grateful that the year is almost over. In a way, I am too, but for different reasons.

I’m excited for the New Year that is fast approaching. It’s a new beginning, a new month and a new year.

And I agree, 2019 has been a difficult year filled with more ups and downs than I would 2019_is_the_stepping_stone_1have liked, yet I believe that it’s been a “stepping stone” to get us all to 2020.

All those ups and downs we’ve experienced have been teaching us valuable life lessons, opened our eyes to see the truth around us, and given us reason to think about what we really want and don’t want in our life.

We’ve managed to survive so far through this crazy year of 2019 that’s almost over, so let’s give it a proper send off, shall we?

“Thank you, 2019, for being a stepping stone for 2020, a year that will put the past behind me and allow me to step into an amazing present, one filled with endless possibilities for my future. Thank you, 2019, for all that you taught me. I’m forever grateful because the lessons you taught me are going to help me to live my best life and live the life that I deserve.”

And it’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

“The Messengers of Drama”

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“Don’t shoot the messenger.”

I’ve never liked that quote because I don’t believe that there should be a messenger, and most times when there is it’s because of a negative person and situation. It’s the “messenger of drama.”

If you have something to say to someone then say it to their face. Why involve a third party to continue your drama and feed into your lies? If you truly believe your message, then make it your truth, stand in it, and deliver directly to the person it’s intended for. Don’t be a coward and use someone else to do your dirty work.

I’m a believer that if you have something to say to me, good or bad, then say it to me, not to anyone who’s willing to listen and please do not send a “third party messenger” to say it.  I believe that if you can’t say it to me, it’s because there’s no truth to what you’re saying in the first place.

I’m sure we’ve all had a “messenger” come knocking at our door at least once in our lifetime and from my experience, the messenger is simply a pawn in someone else’s game of drama. 

Stay out of the tornado of drama, don’t answer the door to the messenger, and if the true message is given from the source then take it from where it comes from: someone’s insecurity, judgement and jealousy. 

What would we gain if we stood in our truth and didn’t play into the game of “messengers and drama?”

“Peace.”

And it’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

In-a-world-of-truth

“The Tornado of Drama”

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The drama that other’s cause is like a tornado sucking in all that’s in its’ path. No one has control over being caught up in the vortex of it, yet a tornado is a force of destruction created by nature. 

Drama is a force of destruction created by another human being.

No one can control the forces of nature, but you can control the forces of drama. 

Don’t allow yourself to be sucked into the path of human destruction and don’t allow yourself to be swept up into the vortex of the drama. 

A tornado will eventually lose its’ power and end.

Drama will only lose its power if you don’t engage with it, don’t feed it and don’t fuel it.

You can’t control the behavior of others and you can’t always stop the person causing the storm, but you can make the choice to seek shelter from it until it goes away. 

Eventually when the storm of drama isn’t being fed it will lose its strength and dissipate, the same way a tornado does.

And what’s left after the storm of drama loses its strength?

“The truth.”

And it’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

Dont-get-sucked-in

“Make The Time To Reach Out”

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If I’ve learned one important thing in life, it’s this: that if I’m thinking about someone I’m going to reach out to them to let them know that they were on my mind.

Because how else would they know? It’s easy to say “I thought of you all day” or “you’ve been on my mind lately,” yet it’s another thing to back those statements up with the actions. After all, as I always say, it’s the actions that make the words true.

I can’t begin to tell you how much it means to me to get a private message, text, or better yet, a phone call from someone who begins the conversation with: “I’ve been thinking of you and wanted to see how you’re doing.” Or “I’ve missed you.” Or “you crossed my mind today and I wanted to let you know that I love you or that I just wanted to hear your voice.”

That means the world to me, and I know it means a lot to the people in my life that I take the time to do that for. No day is promised, and I make sure that when someone crosses my mind I let them know that they did.

We’re human and we all want to know we’re loved, or needed, or appreciated or thought of throughout the day, the night, or every now and again. It’s what keeps us going and makes us feel good, feel loved, feel happy. It’s what makes us want to do that for other’s.

Who did you reach out to today? Did you let someone important to you know how you feel about them? Did you take a moment to let someone know that you were thinking of them? Did you stop what you were doing in your day to let someone know that you love them? I hope that you did.

And who reached out to you today? I hope someone did.

“It’s the actions that make the words you say to someone true.”

It only takes a moment to let someone know that you’re thinking of them and that moment can make all the difference in the world.”

It’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“I’m A 5 Year Breast Cancer Survivor!”

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The day is finally here: I’m a 5 year breast cancer survivor and I couldn’t be more grateful or feel more blessed!5 year cake

I’m grateful for having survived it, grateful for what it taught me, and grateful that it was a part of my life journey that brought me to where I am now!

I’m grateful for the amazing people that came into my life because of it and even grateful for the people who left because of it. Life is always better when you surround yourself with the right people…and I’ve got a wonderful tribe surrounding me!

And I just have to say it one more time: “I’m a 5 year breast cancer survivor today!”

And it’s a very good thing!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“Listen To How They Treat You”

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the way a person treats you

“There’s a message in the way a person treats you…just listen.”

It’s the saying I absolutely believe in: “actions speak louder than words.”

All those loving, positive words you speak to someone are only truthful when the actions back them up.

All those negative, hurtful words you speak to someone are truth. It’s how someone honestly feels about you because when you truly love someone you wouldn’t say things you know that would hurt them. And trust me, those words will stay with them for a lifetime.

If you really love someone, be it your significant other, friend, family or child, why would you say something hurtful to them? You can’t take those words back and if you said them you must have meant them. And if you didn’t mean them then why did you say them? Just to hurt them because you can? To push them away? Or maybe you use those words to put them in their place as a way to control them.

Think about why you say things to hurt someone you love. No human being has the right to hurt another, especially someone who loves you. It could be that you don’t really love them, that you don’t understand love, or that love is nothing more than a matter of convenience to you. And know this: each time you say hurtful words to someone you love you bruise their heart and that heart begins to shut down little by little.

We’re all human and none of us are perfect. We get annoyed sometimes, we get angry, we get cranky…that’s okay, we all have moments like that, but it’s NOT okay to hurt someone you love. It’s NOT okay to make them feel like your bad mood is their fault because it’s not, it’s yours. And it’s NOT okay to think you have the right to say hurtful words to someone because you want to.

We have choices in all areas of our life, especially in our relationships. You have a choice of which words you use, you have a choice in the tone of your voice when you say them, and you have a choice to talk things through calmly with the one you love instead of being mean and hurtful.

And you have a choice to walk away.

You have a bad day? Work getting to you? Are you unhappy? Did someone make you angry or hurt your feelings?

We all rough days now and then, but understand that it’s not fair or right to take YOUR rough day out on another.

Think about what you’re feeling and why…

Don’t take it out on someone who loves you…

Don’t bruise the heart of someone who truly loves you..

And remember that their feelings are just as important as yours…

Be kind or be quiet.

It’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“Be Careful What Doors You Open”

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doors to the past 1

We all have a past; some of it filled with beautiful memories and some of it filled with heartache, sadness and negative energy. Yet I believe that when you close a door in your life it’s best to leave it closed because should you open it you never know what or who you’re letting back in…and that could be something that affects your life today in a negative way.

I believe that it’s fine to “revisit the past for a brief time, if only to remember why you left it in the first place.” Living in the past steals your present and your future. It keeps you from moving forward, it keeps you stuck in a time in your life that’s already passed and it keeps you from living in the moment. And living in the moment is what leads you into your future.

There are pieces of our past that are meant only for us to remember; speaking that past out loud to the wrong person could be hurtful. And I’m talking specifically about relationships here. The older we get the more of a past we have. We’ve had past lovers and significant others, we’ve had past heartache, we’ve had past intimate moments, and the door closed to that once those relationships were over. I’ve had them, too, yet once those doors are closed I keep them closed because once I open the door to the past I’m leaving myself vulnerable to what I’m letting back into a life I already moved forward in.

Opening the door to a past that was left behind means that you’ve allowed that energy back into your life, or you’ve let that person back in. It means you’re choosing to allow the emotions from that time to be felt again, whether good or bad, and it means you’re looking at your present life as less important than your past.

We have all those “past” experiences to teach us life lessons so that we can move into a better life, a better relationship. Remembering old loves is a memory to be kept to yourself; speaking it to your new love will only bring pain to them…and in the end, to you. There are some pieces of our past that are better left unsaid and kept to ourselves, because living in the past can definitely influence your present life which inevitably can affect your future.

We all carry some wonderful memories of our past, myself included, but I believe that when we “live” in our past, remembering our past relationships, then that is a sign that we’re not happy or content in our relationship now. And that is something to think about.

Be careful when opening the doors to your past; you never know “what” or “who” you’re letting back in. And you never know who it’s going to hurt.

The past is meant to be left in the past; your future lies in your present.

Don’t lose sight of the people you love in your present life by constantly looking back at the people you left behind in your past.

Be grateful for the people you love in your life today…

It’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“Feel, Deal and Heal”

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I’ve gone through my share of, what most may say, are traumatic experiences: divorce, cancer, and abuse, to name a few. When I share these experiences publicly many people ask me how I’m still standing, how in the world did I become so positive after so many negative things happened to me.

My answer is always the same: Because I chose to get through and I’m standing even stronger.

And how is that possible?

Because I knew I had to feel all the emotions that came with those “traumas” and deal with them; and that’s how I was able to heal.

No one wants to feel hurt, sadness or brokenness, yet we all do at some point in our life. Many people block those emotions; they tuck them away and believe that they moved on from them. I can tell you that they didn’t. Ignoring what you have to face is lying to yourself and eventually all those emotions you didn’t deal with will catch up with you at some point in your life. They always do.

And when they do catch up with you those around you pay the price for it as well.

Don’t you want to feel happy? Don’t you want to find joy in your life? Don’t you want to let go of an experience that caused you pain?

Sure you do…we all do.

So do it. Take a long look in the mirror at yourself and let your truth come through. Take that experience and all the pain that came with it and deal with it. Feel the pain, the heartache and let the healing waters of your tears flow to release it all. Then forgive the experience so you no longer hold onto it and then forgive yourself for allowing it to hold you back from the happiness you want and deserve.

You can run from those traumatic experiences but trust me, you can’t hide from them until you deal with them.

Feel, deal and heal, my friends.

It’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,
~Anne Dennish~

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“If You Want…”

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dont expect

If you want love you have to love.

If you want honesty you have to be truthful.

If you want loyalty you have to be loyal.

If you want happiness you have to be happy.

If you want compassion you have to be compassionate.

And if you want kindness you have to be kind.

We all want the people in our life to be these things but in order to have that YOU have to be those things because it all begins with YOU!

“Don’t expect from others what they can’t expect from you.”

Remember that.

It’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~