“Thank Goodness For Party Crashers!”

Yesterday was a day to fill a martini glass with tears, and I did. The day began as badly asmartini glass 1 it ended, and it turned into a day filled with nothing but “one thing after another” in between. And do you know what kind of day that becomes? A “pity party.” 

Sometimes we’re the ones who are responsible for the “pity party,” and oftentimes, it’s someone else who takes us to a party that we didn’t want to go to in the first place.

I don’t like days like that but I’ve learned that we all need to have them every so often. They teach us a truth about someone or something, they make us look inward at ourselves to see what part we played in the party, and they happen to remind us to be grateful for all the other days that are good. 

Sometimes all you need to get you out of the party is a couple of party crashers. They’re party crashersthe ones that will come in, make you laugh, and take you home. I’m thankful for my two youngest who crashed my party yesterday, made me laugh, and took me home.

My “pity party “ of yesterday is over and hopefully there’s not another invitation for one coming to me anytime soon.

And I hope that there aren’t any coming for you.

Just remember that if you do go, be sure to leave the door open for the “party crashers” to come in and take you home.

It’s a good thing. 

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“The Lesson In Disappointment”

A week from today I was supposed to fly to California. It’s a trip I’ve been looking forward to ever since I booked my flight over a month ago. Aside from my “happy place” at the Jersey Shore where I live, Malibu is my other “happy place.” The energy there is amazing and for some reason, I feel like I’m “home” when I’m there. Two years ago I spent a week in a Malibu beach house where I finished my book, “Waking Up.” I did some of my best writing there and it was an intense soul searching time for me as well. This trip was important to me, not only because I’d be in a place I love, but because I’d be seeing my oldest son (who I haven’t seen in over a year), my Nike Nephews and would be writing and working on another book.

Over the last few days my intuition was screaming to me: “It’s not the time to go.” And that thought stuck in my head for days. My sister called me two days ago and said that she had a bad feeling about me going and that I should go another time. She also told me to remember what I always say: Everything happens for a reason. And if there’s one thing I believe in with all my heart and one I tell others is this: trust your intuition because it never lies.

So yesterday morning I had to make an adult, big girl, responsible, smart decision…and they’re not the most fun to make. I cancelled my trip. And to say I was disappointed is an understatement, yet I knew in my heart it was the right thing to do. There were too many factors popping up in the last week and I knew days ago that I would have to decide whether to go or not. I don’t like when things get complicated and this trip was beginning to get more and more complicated.

I went to the hairdresser in the morning feeling disappointed and sad and I ran errands feeling disappointed and sad. Those feelings stuck with me all day, yet once I was in the comfort of my home the tears came. The tears started late in the afternoon and continued until I fell asleep. They came in waves over dinner, and came as sobs during my bath. There was nothing I could do to stop the tears; I felt sad, disappointed and broken and I kept wondering “Why did this happen to me?”

And then the answers came through the questions in the tears: because you needed to learn something….and I did.

I remembered what it is I always tell people, and when I heard Elizabeth Gilbert say it I had confirmation that it’s true: set your priorities, make boundaries around your sacred space, and learn to say no.

And that’s true…and I know that, yet I forgot that.

My lesson was that I had lost sight of my priorities, I was allowing people to cross my boundaries, and I was saying “yes” to things I should have been saying “no” to.

So yes, I had a day of sadness and disappointment, of feeling broken, but I knew I had to go through it and get through it and I did. My soul needed to cry long and hard to let go of what I was feeling.

I sit here this morning with a headache and swollen eyes, yet knowing I learned a lesson the hard way…and an important lesson at that.

My point to you is don’t feel badly for having a down day; they happen for a reason and that reason, more often than not, teaches you something that’s for your Highest Good. Sometimes it’s those “dark” days that enable us to see the “light.” Feel what you have to, learn the lesson, and let it go.

Sometimes our biggest disappointments teach us our greatest lessons.

And I’m good with that.

Because this is life…

And it’s a part of the journey. 

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

disappointment

“There’s Strength In The Tears”

I’ve had many people tell me how strong I am and I always wondered why they thought that. After all, I had bad days, sad days, and days of crying for no reason and every reason. Was this being strong? I didn’t think so until a few years ago when I changed my perspective on tears and what they meant.

Tears are our soul’s way of releasing the pain, the pleasure and the emotion built up within us. Tears cleanse our soul of those feelings so that we can again move on with our life. Tears are simply a moment in time that was necessary for our Highest Good.strength and tears

My cousin is a strong woman, the one I call “the gypsy.” I’ve seen her cry and heard her ask me how people could think she was so strong? Well, a few years ago I would have given her a different answer, but on that day I told her she was strong, especially since she knew that there were moments when she knew she had to cry, and she was strong enough to allow herself to cry.

I believe that your strength is in knowing yourself well enough to know that you have to shed a tear or two, or a thousand. Your strength is allowing yourself the time it takes to release your emotions and knowing that you need to do this for yourself.

And your strength is picking yourself up, wiping the tears from your face, and moving forward. Your strength is knowing that you’ve released all that you needed to for that moment and knew it was time to smile again.

That is strength.

Strength is knowing who you are, accepting who you are, and willing to be who you are despite the opinions of anyone else.

Strength is knowing when you need a day to cry, to feel emotions, to miss someone, to want someone, to lose someone. Your strength is within you and the tears you release are merely the soul’s way of helping you through your pain and sadness.

Cry if you need to and cry if you want to… after all, “it won’t be like this forever, just for today!”

And after you’re done, smile, smile, smile!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“Under The Tree – Just Me”

under the tree uncle bobI sit here this morning alone  with my coffee while all my loved ones are asleep, thinking to myself that I can’t wait for this month of March to be over. I lost a very close friend two weeks ago and last night I lost my “favorite” uncle. It seems that throughout my life this month of March has brought pain and heartache, and sadly, I have the proof to back it up. Anyone who knows me will joke and say to me”ugh, it’s that month of March for you.” And so it is, and so I try every year to change it. This year has been a tough one, and this morning I’m grieving and my heart is hurting.

I  hadn’t heard from my close friend, Rosamond, in almost two weeks, so my love and I trekked over to her house, only to find that the car hadn’t been moved and the house was locked up. I came home, called the local police and received the phone call I was dreading an hour later: they found her in her home, and she had passed away.

She was just 70 years old, but one of my closest friends and my greatest spiritual teacher. She was the one who introduced me to this amazing circle of “Angel” people that have been my teachers as well. I miss her everyday and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve picked up the phone to call her…yet she’ll never answer.

Last night I received a call from my cousin on the West Coast. He called to tell me my most favorite uncle had lost his battle to brain cancer. I knew it was coming but I wasn’t ready to

uncle bobby 8

My “favorite uncle” with his “favorite niece.”

know it. He was just 68 years old and a man that had a life of love and passion, excitement and adventure. No matter what life handed him, including cancer, he made the best of it. I’d love to believe that this part of him is part of me.

I’m feeling the loss so deeply this morning, yet I also believe that when someone passes we can still hear them…and sometimes still feel them. I’m grieving at the loss of the physical touch and the sound of their voice.

This morning I’m sitting quietly outside while the rest of my house is asleep; I’m sitting under my “magic tree,” which hasn’t yet bloomed, but it’s still magic. It’s under this tree that I wrote a poem which turned into a song by the same name; it’s under this tree that I can hear my loved ones on the other side; I can hear their reassurance of them being okay and that I will be too; I hear them whisper “I love you and always will” to me; I hear them that they take our love for them with them and that their love for us will always be a part of us; and I hear them assure me that they will always be with me, and that all I need is to speak to them, and they will listen and answer.

It’s this belief that helps me grieve and heal and brings me a sense of peace that while their physical body may be gone, their spiritual soul lives on. And it lives on in me.

Today I remember Rosamond, and I wish my Uncle Bob well on his travels to the other side, knowing he’ll be whole, he’ll be healthy, and he’ll be carrying all our love with him.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~”

*I wrote this song over a year ago and today I dedicate it to my “favorite uncle,” my Uncle Bobby and to my dear friend, Rosamond

 

“A Martini Glass of Tears”

Yesterday was a bad day…and I don’t have those very often. My feelings were hurt, I heard some news that was upsetting, and the realization of who I thought was a friend turned out not to be true. Needless to say, the martini glass was filled with tears by the end of the night.martini glass 1

Yet bad days happen for a reason; they allow us to see what the good days really are. Yesterday was a compilation of all the changes happening in my life at the moment (and most of them are all good!), feeling beat up and manipulated by someone, and knowing that life has just handed me another challenge.

I went to bed in tears last night, and woke up this morning with swollen eyes. But I woke up better. I cried it all out and I believe with all my heart that a good cry is our soul’s way of cleansing all the negativity within us. I had had a week in which negative stuff was building up day by day, and last night it all broke open.

tearsThis morning I woke with the dawn, and sat outside with my coffee, listening to my intuition and the voices of reason that can only be heard in the silence. I’m not upset anymore, and the hurt that I felt from outside sources has lessened. They’ve lessened because I’ve forgiven them…not to their face, or over the phone. I’ve forgiven their hurtful behavior so that I’m not hurt or angry. And I’ve forgiven myself for allowing it to bother me in the first place.

We are in control of our emotions, and perhaps mine exploded last night due to fatigue and sleepless nights. Those are key factors in our “falling apart.” It’s so important to stay healthy and well rested, because when we’re not, our emotions take advantage of us, and we simply don’t have the strength to be strong.

“When you can’t find the strength, let the strength find you.”

My strength found me this morning with the sunrise, a hot cup of coffee, and feeling well rested. Moments like the one I had yesterday have to happen every so often. I believe they’re good for us at times, as long as it’s not happening every day.

“Trials, tribulations and blessings are one in the same because you can’t have one without the other.”

Our greatest blessings come from the lessons we learn from our trials and tribulations, and I truly believe that if we understand that, then we have found the secret to life.

Today is a good day, and I know it will get better. The martini glass that was once filled with tears is empty…and a new day is upon me, with no mistakes in it.

“Every new day is chance to do it better than the day before.”

Wishing you love and light, my friends,

~Anne Dennish~

new day