“Put It Down And Shut It Off”

put down the phone 1

In this day and age most everyone has a cell phone, a social media page, and a computer. Let’s face it, it’s the way the world is today. We search, we follow, we like, we comment…it’s all part of the technology we live in. In fact, most of us are lost without it.

And yes, I have a cell phone, social media pages and a laptop…my career revolves around them, yet I know the appropriate times to use them all and when it’s time to turn them off.

And the time to turn them off is when I’m having human interaction, when the ones I love are with me. I know my time with the people I love is precious and not promised. I guess you could say that the time of social media, the internet and cell phones ARE promised…as long as you pay the bill!

Yet our lives are not promised. We all know how precious a human life is and it frustrates me beyond belief that some people don’t get that. Well, they say they get that until they’re on the phone.

I feel unimportant when someone, be it my significant other, family, child or friend is in my presence and on the phone checking social media. It’s one thing if it’s work but it’s another when it’s pleasure. I feel hurt at thinking that I’m not as important to them as their social media, phone or computer. Let’s face it, we can check our social media anytime we want…posts and comments are there forever. I’m not. No one is.

Most people don’t even realize how long they’re looking at their social media because they go into this “hyper-focus” mode. They lose track of time and more importantly, they lose sight of the person sitting with them. They forget what’s important to them, then again, maybe the “likes, comments and views” of others on social media are more important to them than the “likes, comments or views” of the person that they’re with.

My belief is that if you can sit on your phone, internet or social media that long while I’m there, well, you’ve let me know what’s more important…and it’s not me.

And please remember this: that time you spend on social media, the phone or the computer while the ones you love are with you is time that you can’t get back. Would you rather spend 15 minutes on the internet or 15 minutes with someone important to you?

Life is short, the internet is long…you decide what and who is more important.

Think about that.

Put down the cell phone and turn off the electronics when you’re with the people you love.

It’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“On Being Lonely”

 It’s been such a sad week at hearing of the suicides of Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain. Depression, mental illness, and worse than that, a feeling of loneliness…it attacks even the most strongest of people at times, rich or poor, famous or not. We’re all vulnerable at feeling such times of sadness.

Robin Williams said it best years ago that the worse type of loneliness is being with people who make you feel that way. And he’s right that being alone isn’t the worst thing in the world, it’s being with people you love that make you feel alone.

So today I want to say this to all of you: If you’re blessed to have people in your life that love you, care for you, respect you, and are always there for you then know how lucky you are. It’s a gift to have people like that in your life.

Be sure to let them know you feel the same. Don’t let the ones you love feel lonely. Give back to them all the gifts they give to you.

Think about it.

Stop what you’re doing right now and grab the hand of someone who loves you that may or may not be going through a sad day; wrap your arms around them in a loving hug; sit with them, share your thoughts with them, share yourself with them.

Be there.

Don’t wait for the day they’re not there anymore for you.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

robin williams

“One Chair”

Years ago whenever my grandmother saw a two seater car she’d say: “That’s a selfish car. There’s only enough room for two people.” It was a funny thing to hear her say, yet as I’ve grown older I understand even more of what she was saying.

I’m that way with chairs.

My front porch has a table and two chairs on one side of the door and on the other side is two chairs with a table between them. I’m usually in one of those chairs and look forward to the people I love sitting with me in the other chair.

There’s not always someone sitting with me but there’s an empty chair just always waiting for someone who needs to use it.

When I see someone put only one chair out for themselves it tells me a couple of things. It tells me that they want to be alone, it tells me that they don’t want me sitting with them, it tells me that they never had a thought to how I was feeling and that I may need someone to give me a chair.

Sometimes we all need a chair. We need that second chair to know we’re not alone. We need that second chair so that we don’t feel lonely. We need that second chair to let us know that someone is just waiting for us to sit in it.

The second chair means that someone wants us.

The second chair means that someone loves us.

The second chair means that we matter.

And to me, when I see only one chair I see a person who is selfish, who doesn’t care about anyone other than themselves and a person who takes the people in his life for granted.

You can spend your life with only one chair.

But remember what that chair represents to those that love you.

And be mindful and aware that a day may come in which there won’t be that person to fill a second chair;  you will be there alone with one chair.

I love having two chairs on my front porch.

It’s my small way of letting the people I love know that they’re always welcome to be with me, that I love them, and that I want to spend time with them.

Chairs.

How many do you have?

I hope you have more than one.

It’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

two chairs

“It Takes But One Moment…”

Sometimes it takes one moment, one conversation, one word from someone else in which you find yourself “waking up” to something you weren’t seeing. It’s that moment which stops you in your tracks and makes you toss off the rose colored glasses and see the reality of a situation for the truth that it is.

And it can make you angry with yourself, it can hurt your heart, it can make you sad, but no matter the emotion it causes within you, it’s one that you need to deal with. You have to think about why you weren’t seeing what you needed to. You have to wonder how it all got to this point. And you have to understand your feelings and figure out what your role in getting to this point was. After all, we allowed it to happen. Maybe not consciously, but we allowed it.

And we allowed it because we lost sight of something that should be the most important thing: you.

It happens more often than not, and sadly, we don’t always see it coming…in fact we never see it coming until it’s here. What you do with it next is the key to moving forward: you have to forgive yourself.

Forgive yourself for making someone else more important and valuable than yourself; forgive yourself for allowing someone else’s life to hold more importance and value than your own; and forgive yourself for loving someone else more than you love yourself.

Forgive yourself for allowing someone else to care less about you than you care about them; forgive yourself for loving someone more than you love yourself; and forgive yourself for not seeing it.

And then try to understand why it happened; why you didn’t see it coming; and why you allowed it.

We do so many selfless things where love for our children, friends and significant others are concerned that we often lose sight of ourselves and that’s when your “waking up” moment happens. It’s the Universe’s way of telling us that we haven’t been paying enough attention to ourselves and that we let our love for other’s cloud our love for ourselves.

Call it a “wake up” call from the Universe or a nudge from your Higher Power, but regardless, it comes from a source that loves you unconditionally and that source wants the best for you.

Forgive yourself for allowing the moment to happen and embrace the beautiful mess you are for learning the lesson from it: never let anyone love you less than you love yourself.

You are just as important as anyone you place importance on; you are just as valuable as anyone you place value on; and you are as worthy of love as anyone you love.

It was yet another life lesson to learn and one to be grateful for, because it happened to help you have the best life possible. It’s never selfish to do what’s best for YOU because doing what’s best for YOU spills onto the ones around you that you love.

And always remember the most important thing of all:

YOU ARE AMAZING!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~