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Dealing With “The Stuff!”

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Let’s talk about “the stuff.” You know what I mean, the stuff that haunts your dreams and keeps you up at night. The “stuff” that makes you think “I shouldn’t have done that, I should have done things differently and I wish I could go back in time.”

That’s the stuff I’m talking about. It’s the stuff that we have to let go of because we can’t fix it, we can’t change it and we can’t take it back. It’s that kind of “stuff.”

We’re human. We make mistakes even when we’re trying to do it right. We make the wrong choices even though we thought that they were right. And we make decisions that we think are right for everyone concerned that turn out not to be.

I go to bed some nights with “the stuff.” And I don’t like it, not one bit. But I know it’s the “stuff” that got me here, that taught me to do things differently and taught me to forgive myself.

Tonight when you go to sleep, let go of the “stuff.” The “stuff” is old, it’s in the past and it can’t be changed or undone.

Go to sleep tonight with gratitude that you’re still here to deal with the “stuff,” gratitude to forgive it, and gratitude for life giving you the ability to learn from it and not make the same mistake twice.

We all have “stuff.” 

Tonight let’s put that “stuff” to rest and love ourselves for all that we’ve lived through, all that we’ve learned and all the good “stuff” we can put out into the world because of it.

We got this…

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“Vulnerability”

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We all want to feel important to the people who are important to us. We want to know that we’re a priority, not a convenience. We want to know that the relationship means as much to them as it does to us.

It doesn’t always work that way.

We are all different and what’s important to the people we care about may not be important to us. It’s crucial that in any relationship you have to communicate. You have to be vulnerable with your feelings and not be judged for them. You have to listen and understand that the other person may feel differently than you.

And that’s what makes life interesting. We’re different and if we weren’t, life would be boring. We have to accept the people in our life for WHO they are, not what you want them to be.

You learn from the differences of others. You may learn a different perspective, or different way of thinking, and you may even learn more about yourself.

I know that disagreements happen but I also know that through communication comes a deeper understanding about the nature of the disagreement. You have to be vulnerable to communicate with others, especially those that you are closest to, and that honest vulnerability should never be judged.

I think it’s a gift when someone in my life is vulnerable to me. It means they trust their feelings with me and know that they won’t be judged or told that they’re wrong.

And when disagreements come up in your relationship, friendships or family, remember this: “Say what you mean, mean what you say, but don’t be mean when you say it.”

Kindness, compassion and understanding go a long way.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“Good-Bye To My Childhood Home”

/ Anne Dennish / 2 Comments

Two weeks ago my brother, sister and I gathered at our childhood home to say good-bye to it. We’d been packing up my parents house for months and the time to bid farewell was upon us. This was the house we grew up in and as my sister and I sat one afternoon in the living room, it suddenly hit us that this was our tie to the Jersey Shore and even though my parents were snowbirds, the grandkids always had a place to stop in the summer for a grilled cheese, to do laundry or just spend time with their grandparents. The same rings true for my brother and sister. I’ve been lucky enough to have lived at the shore all of my life so when they weren’t in Florida, they were home and I was close by. Yet time marches on, life changes and my parents will now be living in Florida full-time. It’s a big change for all of us because the only way we’ll see them now is to visit them there. 

It wasn’t easy going through all the things that my parents had saved, yet we certainly had a few laughs along the way. It was a time of remembering our youth and telling old stories. 

The same day that I moved from the Jersey Shore to Delaware was the same day I said good-bye to my parents and to my childhood home. Life will never be the same without this old house but it’s time for the next chapter and a new adventure for all of us. 

I love this picture below of the five of us. It’s the first time we’ve all been together in years and we certainly spent much of that time laughing! That’s how we said good-bye to our house on the boulevard. 

I know that the world is a troubled place right now and so much has happened in the last few days, but I also believe that even in the midst of it all, it’s important to remember the good times and to be grateful. Memories are a good distraction, if only for a brief moment or two, to bring us back to simpler, even happier times in our life. 

Hold onto the memories and embrace the next chapter with open arms.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“That Oneness Guy” Interview with Anne Dennish

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Danny Rongo, “That Oneness Guy” asked me to kick off the fifth season of his podcast and I was thrilled to do it! We had a great time doing this interview as we talked about my books, my breast cancer and how we both keep a positive outlook on life. If you’re looking for some encouragement, motivation and inspiration, take a listen.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“Can You Taste The Love?”

/ Anne Dennish / 4 Comments

I remember when my oldest was about two years old and eating some of my home baked cookies. I asked him, “ Can you taste all the love I put in there?”

To which he replied, “I can! You put a lot of love in there.”

And so began the phrase of “I can taste the love” from all five of my children with every meal I made or cookies and cakes that I baked. 

There were times when I made their favorite food that they would say, “You put extra love in this! I can taste it!”

I was reminded of this precious tradition that began over 30 years ago when I spoke with my Noah last night. They asked me if I still had my old Better Homes and Garden Cookbook (which I do!) and could I send them a screenshot of the banana bread recipe. I told them that I would and I did.

Such a simple thing yet one that is so precious.

I can still see those sweet little faces eating a chocolate chip cookie, the chocolate all over their mouths saying “I can taste the love!”

And you know what? I always did put the love in whatever I made for them to eat, no matter their age. It meant so much to me to see how happy that made them and I hope someday they’ll understand that it made me even happier.

Once in a while there are those rare moments as adults that they’ll still say that they “can taste the love.”

I texted Noah the banana bread recipe last night and reminded him to put the “love” in it.

And they said that they remembered that.

It was a “be still my heart” moment and I’m grateful for that.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“New Year’s Revelations in 2022!”

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“Resolutions are promises you don’t often keep. Revelations are lessons you learn that can change your life.”I learned that the only way for my life to change in the New Year was to think about the lessons that the year had taught me. Those lessons became my “New Year Revelations.”

Every year I notice that as the New Year approaches, people start talking about their “resolutions.” There’s things they want to do and things they want to change in their life so they make a list of “resolutions.”

I threw that concept out years ago because to me, resolutions were nothing more than making promises to myself that I couldn’t keep. They were goals for sure, but seriously, how many of us actually stick to those resolutions? I always tried, failed at some, then beat myself up for not doing what I had wanted.

So, years ago I realized that the only way for my life to change was by learning the lessons that life had handed me, learning from my mistakes, and learning from my experiences, and so I decided to have my “New Year’s Revelations!” I ask myself some important questions throughout the month of December: What opened my eyes this past year? What did I learn about myself? What type of people am I surrounding myself? Am I taking care of myself and loving myself enough or giving too much of myself away? And what do I need to let go of that has no place in the New Year coming up and in my life?

These are the questions to ask yourself and answer honestly. You see, when you have those “revelations” about yourself and the year that’s about to come to an end, you take those lessons and truths with you. When you do that, the New Year will open the door to endless possibilities. Don’t put added stress on yourself by making “resolutions.”

Take the time to think about your “revelations” and begin the New Year in a positive light. All things are possible if you just believe in yourself!

Here’s to an awesome 2022! Happy New Year, my loves!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“My Mom and Me”

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It’s the day after Christmas and I’ve taken the day off from cooking, baking and all other holiday tasks and relaxed. I missed having my children home but I did make a beautiful Christmas dinner for my parents and spent time with them, yet it’s my mom that is in my mind today.

My mom and I have had a strained relationship most of my life yet as she gets older and I get older, I believe that we have a newfound respect for one another. I love my mom and always felt that I never measured up, never pleased her, and never made her proud. Yet I’ve learned to understand her and take into account the life she lived as a child and as she became a mom.

That’s the thing as our parents get older, we see things differently and begin to understand them in a whole new way. I needed to find forgiveness for the mistakes that my mom made because I’ve made mistakes of my own. I needed to understand that my mom was young once with her own heartache from losing her dad at the age of 7 and being raised by a single mom. And I needed to know and accept that she did the best that she could, because she really did try to do her best and she still does.

And I understand all of that now because I’m a mom who has tried to do the best she could, mistakes and all. I understand my mom now because I’m a mom and because I realized that she was also a person who was trying to live her life the best that she could.

This Christmas I may have been missing my children yet I also realized that in time I’ll be missing my mom, and I don’t want to miss any chance of that time we have together.

I love these pictures that were taken of my mom and I on Christmas night. We laughed a lot and I am so grateful for the time we spent together last night. Apologies to my dad for no pictures but this was all about my mom and me.

Moments we spend with those we love are meant to be treasured and I am holding the memories of last night tight in my heart.

I am grateful to have spent Christmas night with my parents, especially with my mom.

Life is precious. Embrace it. Love one another. And please, be kind.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“Here Comes That Holiday Anxiety!”

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The holidays are fast approaching and that “good ‘ol anxiety” we sometimes feel is taking advantage of us and rearing its ugly head! So many people have anxiety at this time of year and this year it seems to be worse. We feel cut off from friends and family and isolated from having a social life that we’ve grown accustomed to.

But this too shall pass.

Be kind to yourself and others.

Be gentle and forgiving with yourself and others.

And remember that this holiday season will soon become a memory to be shared next year when you’re surrounded by family, friends and loved ones.

We’re all in this together even though we have to do it apart.

Hang in there, my loves.

You got this!

And you’re doing just fine.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“Life And Love Is About Forgiveness!

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Human behavior always amazes me, especially when hearts are broken or bruised. I’ve had quite a few broken hearts in my life. When I was younger and immature my first thought would have been to “pay them back.” Let’s face it, that’s what most teenagers do. Yet as I grew older I learned that a pay back isn’t the solution for a broken heart. It’s not the solution to anything. Broken and bruised hearts happen for so many reasons, yet as I always say, if your heart feels any pain then remind yourself that your heart still works. We can’t feel brokenness if we can’t feel love. I’ve learned that when someone breaks my heart there is no easy fix, and no pay back or spiteful behavior will help ease the pain. In fact, the more you act out in vindictiveness or spite towards someone who hurt you, the more you’ll stay in your own pain. You’ll never move forward and you’ll never heal. And don’t we all want to heal from something that has hurt us? I will tell you in no uncertain terms that hurting someone that hurt you isn’t the answer and will never serve you well. Talk to the person who hurt you, express your feelings, and listen to their reasons as to why they had done something to hurt you. Not everyone hurts another human being on purpose. I know I don’t. Sometimes it’s inevitable that we hurt the ones we love, not because we stopped loving them, but because we began to love ourselves in a way that they couldn’t or wouldn’t.

“The heart has a mind of its own” and when that heart has been hurt by someone they love, the mind seems to take over with no reason or rhyme. A heart that truly knows love will never lose sight of how precious it is. The heart knows how it feels and every so often the mind gets involved to help it through the pain. We all have gone through a broken heart at one time or another, but I beg of you, don’t allow your pain to hurt someone back. Nothing good will ever come out of negative emotions. Feel the pain, deal with the “why,” and heal from it. The pain of a broken heart won’t last forever, but your spiteful actions towards them will. And that’s my thoughts for tonight. If you’re feeling hurt, feel it, but don’t feel the need to inflict intentional pain on another human being. In the end, what goes around comes around. It always does. Life and love is about “forgiveness.” And that’s the only way to heal.

Wishing you love and light,

~AnneDennish~

“And Then There Are The Other Heroes”

/ Anne Dennish / 1 Comment

There are many heroes out in the world today keeping us safe, taking care of us and trying to keep life going, yet I believe there is another hero we don’t give credit to and that’s our children.

The definition of a “hero” is: a person who is admired or idealized for courage, outstanding achievements, or noble qualities.

And I admire my children, your children and the youth of the world who are living through these uncertain times right along with us. They are heroes as well.

They’re quarantined home just like the rest of us, they can’t see their friends or family, they can’t go to school and for some, there will be no senior class trip or high school/college graduation. Imagine what they’re feeling and thinking. Imagine how WE would feel at that age.

I look at my 18 and 22 year old in amazement. I’m empathetic and can feel what they’re feeling and think to myself that I would have gone crazy at that age being stuck in the house with my parents and siblings! It truly would have driven me out of my mind. Yet here they are, just like the rest of us: quarantined.

None of us have ever seen something like this in our lifetime and I hope that we never do again, but here are our children. They’re young with an entire lifetime ahead of them and look at their lives now. They’re quarantined just like the rest of us, but the difference is we had that life and freedom at a young age and right now they don’t. As adults we can sit here in quarantine and wonder what life will be like after it’s over. They are just beginning their lives, thinking about what they want to be when they grow up, or where they want to live. They’re looking and planning towards a future that is uncertain. Imagine all those thoughts that go through their minds. I imagine them when I see that look of boredom on their faces, or the sadness over not seeing their friends. I imagine them when I talk to my kids who live across the country and can hear the sadness in their voices or a tone of disappointment knowing that the life they started on their own is all changed. All of them were laid off from the jobs that they loved because of the quarantine. They all comply with the orders that we’ve been given, including wearing gloves, masks and social distancing. I have to say, it breaks my heart to see pictures of my kids wearing masks. 

I love my five children with all that I am and when this quarantine starts to get to me or they start to drive me crazy I remind myself of how it must feel for them. Suddenly, it doesn’t feel so bad for me and I understand about their bad days because I remember all the fun and freedom I lived through as a teenager, the times that they can’t right now.

My kids are handling it better than I would have expected. They’re constantly watching out for me because I’m “high risk” and there are days they put my well-being above their own. They’re making the best of this quarantine and doing what they can to laugh, smile and have fun together…and they even include me!

I have to believe that they’ll come through this stronger and with an even deeper gratitude for freedom and life than they had already had.

There are many people out there that are “heroes,” and I count my kids among them.

Here’s to my five kids, your kids, and the youth of the world: “Thank you for handling this as well as you are. I know it’s not easy, but thank you for doing what needs to be done. You are my hero!”

In the end, we’re all heroes for staying home and saving lives by doing so.

Hang in there…you’ve got this!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~your_custom_beautiful_quotes_here (1)