Author: Anne Dennish

“On Meeting Elizabeth Gilbert”

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I’ve always loved the author, Elizabeth Gilbert. I’ve read most of what she’s written yet I have to say that her one book, which turned into a movie starring Julia Roberts, was my favorite, and that was the infamou “Eat, Pray, Love.” It’s a true story of her life at that point in her journey and one that I learned many life lessons from.

Another book she wrote, “Big Magic” is my second favorite because, as a writer, I understand all that she speaks of and writes about.

So when the opportunity came up a few weeks ago to see her speak in person, I jumped at the chance.

As a writer, I’ve always wanted to meet her and share my own books with her, but basie 4opportunities to do that are far and few in between. I’ve held onto the thought, actually, “the dream” of meeting her one day, and I’ve held that dream for many, many years.

As a spiritual person I knew that if my meeting her was meant to happen, it would, and it would happen as it should, how it should and when it would. So it was no surprise that in February a post from Count Basie Theater in Red Bank, New Jersey appeared on my Facebook newsfeed: Elizabeth Gilbert would be speaking there. I knew I needed to get tickets and if that wasn’t enough, the event was being held  on my birthday! It was at moment that I knew the Universe had set this dream of mine up to become a reality…my patience and continued belief that I would meet her someday was paying off.

I proceeded directly to “purchase tickets” and much to my surprise and excitement found that I could buy tickets which also allowed a “meet and greet” with Liz. My head was spinning and my heart skipping beats as I realized that this dream of mine was coming true…that I would finally get to meet one of my “hero’s” of literature. I purchased the tickets and sat with the biggest grin on my face for the rest of the night…actually for everyday that was one day closer to that night.

As the time was quickly approaching I was beginning to get a bit nervous, after all, basiemeeting a “hero” can either be wonderful or a shot in the arm. What we perceive people to be through their books and social media does not always ring true when you meet them. I hoped upon hope that she would be everything I had imagined…

And she was…and she was more than I had imagined.

My love and I were about fifth in line to meet her. I knew she wasn’t signing any of her books that night, but had hoped she would accept my two books as my birthday gift to her!

Her staff took my coat and pocketbook, as well as my cell phone so that they could take pictures.  My heart was racing as I walked toward her. It was such a surreal moment of seeing her and walking towards this woman whose books had changed my life. As I approached her,  she smiled, said “hello,” and embraced me in a hug, one filled with all the love and light she is…and with an incredible amount of energy!

liz gilbertShe spent about five minutes speaking with me and graciously accepted my books. I told her that it was my birthday, to which she wished me a wonderful one, and that I had just reached my four year breast cancer survivor date. I offered my condolences over the loss of her wife, Rayya, and told her how much she meant to me. She took the time to pose for several pictures with me and I was on my way.

I was in heaven…on Cloud Nine, if you will. And so was every other person that had the chance to meet her that night.

It was time for her to speak so we took our seats in the fourth row. I snapped picturebasie 2 after picture and hung onto every profound word she spoke. Meeting her was a dream come true, yet I had one more opportunity to speak “one on one” from the audience with Liz. She had time for a few questions and I was right up in line in front of a microphone asking her mine. I felt as though it was a private conversation between the two of us, even though there was an entired audience sharing in it!

It was truly the most perfect birthday I’ve ever had, and that energy, that feeling of my dream coming into a reality lasted well past that night…once again an experience with Elizabeth Gilbert changed me a bit, put a few things in a different perspective, and made me want to be as good a writer as she is and be able to touch a life and the world in the laid back, easy going, and honest way that she does.

So if you were to ask me what she was like I would tell you this: She was beautiful, humble, kind, compassionate, honest, down to earth, sweet, warm, loving and an amazing human being to be in the presence of.

Thank you, Elizabeth Gilbert, for being all that I had hoped and more; for putting the real you out there for the world to see, not some facade of what the world wants you to be; and for embracing me, speaking with me, and accepting my two books that I’ve written, and two books which carry a lot of lessons I’ve learned from you.

It was my honor, my privilege, and my dream turned into a reality to meet you.

And that is my experience on meeting Elizabeth Gilbert.

It was one I will never forget.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

elizabeth and me

 

 

“Control and Submission”

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This “cat and mouse” game is also a form of abuse…know the signs of a controlling person and distance yourself from them. It’s the healthiest thing you can do for yourself and those that you love.

Anne Dennish's avatarAnne Dennish - Writer/Author

*On a personal note: I’m not an expert on this subject, but I’ve been in this situation before and know the signs of it happening, which is why I’m writing about it now. Every so often I see someone I care about being controlled by the wrong person and I watch as they become submissive to them. I can only share my personal experience with them to try and help them see the unhealthy situation they’ve allowed themselves to be in, yet as always, it’s a life lesson for them. I can’t fix them, save them, or change their situation…only they can do that. It’s a lesson they need to learn, just as I had many years ago, and all I can do is offer my support and share my experience with them. ~Anne Dennish~

“Submission” is a state in which people can no longer do what they want to…

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“Losing The Time You’ll Never Get Back”

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Just a reminder…

Anne Dennish's avatarAnne Dennish - Writer/Author

lost time

I want to give you something to think about: all the countless hours you spend working for a living are all the countless hours you’ve lost with the people you love…and you will never get that time back again.

I’m blessed to have a career that allows me to work at home, and believe me when I say that it’s work but it’s work that I love. Yet I will never get so busy writing, editing, marketing or making phone calls that I forget to make time with the ones I love. My career would mean nothing to me if that were the case. I love the time I spend writing, but I love my time with the important people in my life much more.

I’ve worked 9-5 jobs throughout my life, yet I still held to one important fact: I love my job (most of the time) but I…

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“My Collective Soul” Is Released!

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My new book, “My Collective Soul: Things I Know Without Knowing Why” is officially released! I’m more than excited to have my book available to the public and so grateful for the journey that got me to this point!

This book is filled with intimate and personal stories of my experiences in life, including breast cancer. My hope is that it will make a a difference in someones’ life and ultimately make a difference in the world.

Thank you for all your love and support along my journey…

I’m so very grateful for all of you.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“Four Year Survivor Today!”

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February certainly has been a month of new beginnings, adventure and milestones, but today I celebrate a day that I am incredibly grateful for: TODAY I AM A FOUR YEAR BREAST CANCER SURVIVOR!

I was diagnosed with breast cancer in July of 2013, underwent chemo and radiation and had a lumpectomy four years ago today, which is the day that ended the journey and the day I became “cancer-free!”

And I’ve been grateful for every day since then; I’m blessed with another day to live my dream and my passion of writing; another day to love the people I’m surrounded by; another day to live my life to the fullest; and another day to try and make a difference in someone’s life and the world.

I sit in much gratitude today for the blessing of being able to say I had breast cancer and survived it. 

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“Picking Up Bad Vibes”

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I love meeting new people, yet every so often I meet one that, simply put, rubs me the wrong way. I don’t always know “why” that happens, and it doesn’t happen often, but I do know it’s my intuition talking to me: it’s telling me to walk away from them.

It’s my intuition picking up some “bad vibes and negative energy” from them.

It’s my intuition telling me that they’re not who they seem to be and to proceed with caution.

It’s my intuition telling me to walk away from them, release the bad vibes I got from them, cleanse myself of their negative energy, and do whatever it takes to never be around them again.

So many times we find ourselves in situations in which we feel uncomfortable; we may not know at that moment “why” we feel what we do, but I’m here to tell you to “trust your gut.” The answer to “why” will present itself to you when it’s meant to.

As for me, I’m a 24 hour girl, one who continues to think about something for that amount of time until I understand my feelings. So, when my intuition speaks, I listen, and then I begin to process my “why” and allow the answer to come…and it always does.

We’re not meant to like everyone we meet. Sometimes we meet the “negative vibe” people to teach us something about ourselves, or about them. Sometimes we meet them as a test to see if we’re truly listening to our intuition or not.

It’s okay to distance yourself from the people who make you feel uneasy, or angry, or uncomfortable. This is simply your intuition looking out for you.

Walk away from the people who send off bad vibes…

And keep the “good vibes” in your tribe…

It’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

bad vibes

“The Weak Man & The Strong Woman”

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marnieMy incredibly talented cousin and writer, Marnie Mitchell-Lister, wrote this and I think it’s worth a discussion.

*A note from Anne Dennish: Please note that this article was written in the context of men and women, yet it is meant for all relationships. 

I can speak from experience about this subject, and from the heartache it causes.

I’ve been told I’m a “strong” woman, which I would say is true. I’ve handled divorce, raised five children, survived breast cancer and handled a million other responsibilities at one time. Although to me, being a strong woman is much more than what you handle; it’s HOW you handle it. And I’ve never NEEDED a man in my life to handle any of it for me, but I had always WANTED a confident man in my life.

A few years ago I started asking men of all ages this question: do you want a relationship with a strong woman or a weak woman? While their responses may have been slightly different, the answers were all the same.

They told me that as far as dating, they want a “weak” woman because she makes him feel important; she makes him feel needed; she feeds his ego to levels beyond belief; and that it makes them feel more powerful and stronger to know that a weak woman is in their “control.”

In other words, weak women turned them into strong men.

Yet strangely, there was another piece to their answers. They said that while a “weak” woman was great for their ego and self-esteem, in the end they wanted to settle down with a “strong” woman. One who didn’t “need” them but “wanted” them; one that wasn’t always whining and asking them to do everything for them; one who challenged them and made them want to be a better man.

Confused? I sure was at the time, but it all made sense.

A confident man doesn’t need a “weak” woman; they need a “strong” one to keep them in balance. After a terrible day at work they want to come home to a woman who understands and makes their night better than their day (a weak woman would expect them to do that for them); they want a woman who can have a conversation with them that isn’t all about them (a weak woman would sit with gazing eyes at them, hanging on every word as they talked about themselves and not her); they want a woman with a life of her own, a passion, a career, a life purpose that they can share in(a weak woman has none of that except for him).

A confident man wants to be called out and held accountable by a strong woman, because they know they’ll be honest enough to do it (a weak woman will tell the man that he’s perfect); they want a woman will engage with him on occasion in meaningful conversation (a weak woman has nothing important to say); and he wants a woman who knows what love is, knows her truth, and doesn’t settle for less than she deserves (a weak woman will take whatever she can get.)

A confident man knows how to treat a strong woman; he knows her worth and value; he knows her heart, mind and soul; he takes the time to listen to her and understand; he’s sure to always let her know how important she is to him.

A confident man knows that if he stops paying attention to a strong woman she’ll find someone else. After all, if you’re not paying attention to the one you love, most assuredly someone else will. While you’re making her feel invisible by ignoring what a wonderful woman she is, someone else will see her and put her on a pedestal.

A confident man will know that he’s blessed and lucky to have a strong woman loving him, supporting him, and caring for him. He’ll know that he can always count on her, no matter what. He’ll always let her know how important she is; how loved she is, and how “wanted” she is.

A confident man won’t “need” a strong woman; he’ll “want” one, at least if he’s smart he will.

Healthy relationships aren’t based on boosting each others’ egos or self-esteem; they aren’t built on the other person making us happy; and they aren’t based on being controlled by another.

Healthy relationships are built on two strong people who love each other and know how blessed they are to have one another. They are sustained on feeling gratitude for each other on a daily basis. They are kept moving forward by keeping the love alive.

Yes, it was an interesting response of answers I received from men, young and old, but I guess in the grand scheme of settling into a long term relationship or a marriage that will last a lifetime, the song remains the same: the confident man wants a strong woman.

And the strong woman wants a confident man.

“A confident man not only understands that, he realizes how incredibly special that actually is.”  ~Marnie Mitchell-Lister~

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“The Life Of A Writer”

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life of a writer

I love being a writer. It’s crazy, it’s enlightening, it’s therapeutic; it’s living a life on fire with a passion for words; a passion for observing the world; a passion for love, life, and the people in it. It’s waking up at 3 in the morning  and coming to life with a story in your head; it’s nights of waking up during a good nights sleep with the next chapter; it’s constant thinking, wondering and figuring it all out.

It’s a 24 hour a day job, 7 days a week; the only days off are the one’s in which you don’t write, but you’re writing in your head even when you’re not writing on the computer or paper.

It’s finding a story in every conversation you have; in every person you talk to during the course of a day; and in every social event you attend.

It’s endless notebooks and journals of notes, of titles, of thoughts, of words.

It’s always “remembering something so you never forget.”

It’s always analyzing a situation to figure out the lesson or the message.

It’s always wondering “why” and “how” and “what if?”

It’s always wondering about your past that led you to your present that will take you into your future.

It’s always wondering what your dreams meant and why certain thoughts enter your mind at the oddest of moments and hours of the day.

And it’s always wondering about the title of the next story, the next book, the next blog, the next post…and so on.

It’s a mind that never turns off, slows down, takes a break, or stops thinking.

It’s a mind that’s forever listening, forever wondering, forever seeing the endless possibilities in every minute of every day, in every person you speak to, of every experience, of every lesson, of everything…everything!

It’s listening to different genres of music that pertain to your different moods; sad music for pity party days, upbeat music for when you’re feeling great!

It’s feeling all the emotions that life hands you and loving each and every one of them. You love the sad, the joy, the happy, the heartache because a writer knows that every emotion is a gift, and each gift becomes the words to a beautiful story or poem or lyric.

Writers flourish under pressure and under pain…our best writing comes from the deepest of pain. We hold onto it until we turn it into something beautiful; it’s at that moment that we can finally let it go.

It’s feeling the pain in the world and turning it into a beautiful words of hope, faith and encouragement.

It’s feeling the joy in the world and turning it into a motivational story of endless possibilities.

Writer’s feel it all; we accept it all; and we love it all because no matter the emotion, negative or positive, sad or happy, we’re able to embrace it, live it, feel it, learn from it and write about it.

And then we move on…

But not a moment before…

There are those in my life that tell me I hold onto things too long, to just “let it go,” but as a writer, I can’t. It’s not in my nature nor is it in my soul. It’s not how I’m wired or how I was born. It’s nothing I can change and I wouldn’t want to try. It’s who I am…body and soul, mind and heart.

Feeling pain is something I’ve grown accustomed to. Life happens and even pain and heartache happens to a writer. How else could we write what we do? Pleasure is born out of pain; happiness is born out of heartache; joy is born out of sorrow. So why would we not feel these emotions? It’s our feelings that give us focus, give us answers and clarity, and most importantly, it’s our feelings that give us the “words!”

Writer’s are built on words.

We are great communicators.

We are intuitive…and insightful…and pay way more attention to detail than the average person. We listen, we hear, we process, and we write.

We live everyday to its’ fullest, whether we’re sad or happy, whether you believe it or not. We don’t see feeling heartache or pain as a waste of time; and we don’t see joy and happiness as time better served. We see it all as life…our life…your life…and we value all of it as precious time.

For me, “when my heart speaks I listen, and then I write.”

And that’s the truth.

My stories begin in my heart and soul; they are cultivated through my tears and heartache; they are polished by my joy and happiness; and they are written by the words of my truth.

If the eyes are the window to the soul, my writing is the window into “me.”

If you’re not a writer you’ll never understand, and why would you?

We writer’s are dreamers, and most of the “real” world thinks we’re crazy; obsessed; and a little weird. They think we’re constantly pursuing a dream we’ll never catch yet we believe differently. We believe in our dreams and in ourselves; we are born out of this obsession to achieve the dreams, no matter the cost; and yes, maybe we’re a bit weird because we know that what we dream, what we write and what we feel is reality: it’s the reality of a writer.

I love the life of being a writer; it’s crazy, it’s exhausting, it’s painful, and it’s simply amazing.

I am Anne Dennish…

I’m a writer, a dreamer and a poet…

I’m aware of my surroundings and all the people in it…

I’m a talker and a listener…

I’m your friend, your family and your lover…

I’m your mom and your mentor…

I’m all these things because…

I’m a writer.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

I am a writer!
Anne Dennish- Author
Anne Dennish – Author

Photos by Tim McGeough – EVNFlo Photography

“Losing The Time You’ll Never Get Back”

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lost time

I want to give you something to think about: all the countless hours you spend working for a living are all the countless hours you’ve lost with the people you love…and you will never get that time back again.

I’m blessed to have a career that allows me to work at home, and believe me when I say that it’s work but it’s work that I love. Yet I will never get so busy writing, editing, marketing or making phone calls that I forget to make time with the ones I love. My career would mean nothing to me if that were the case. I love the time I spend writing, but I love my time with the important people in my life much more.

I’ve worked 9-5 jobs throughout my life, yet I still held to one important fact: I love my job (most of the time) but I love my life and the people in it much more. It’s a balancing act; it’s a time to say “no” to overtime; a time to decide what and who your priority is: the job or your life and the people in it.  I’ve always chosen the people in my life because I realized that neither the job nor the people in my life will always be there, so I had to choose which was more important…and that was the “people,” never the job.

I’m going to go out on a limb here and tell you where this story came from and it comes from a place of love.It’s a tough position for me to be in, yet being the person I am, I needed to figure out a way to explain my feelings and more importantly, how this situation was looking to me and to the outside world.

So I realized what the most important part of this was: the person I care about was losing precious time to someone who didn’t care about him and he was giving his time away to someone who didn’t deserve it; and all that time was given in vain and he will never get that time back again, not with me, his friends, or his family.

It was born from an experience from me watching someone I care about work more hours than he was meant to, deserved to, or wanted to. He kept telling his “boss” that he was exhausted and needed a day off, yet his boss didn’t seem to care; he wanted what he wanted and he got it. This person worked every weekend he was off and he’s worked on every day that he was supposed to be off; he’s worked more overtime than was necessary because the other employees in the office didn’t want to do the work. I have to admit, this was upsetting to me; no one wants to watch someone they care about worn down and beaten into submission to do what someone else wanted them to do; no one wants to be spending time with the one they care about on a weekend together with the phone constantly spitting out text noises from a boss who wants more and more and can’t leave them alone; no one wants to watch someone they care about feel less of who they are because of someone who feels more of who they are by using their power and position to feel “in control.”

I’ve lost so many people I’ve loved over the past few years, and while I know they’re at peace now, I so wish I had had more time with them.

And that’s the point I’m making by writing this article: be mindful of the person you spend your precious time on and with and be mindful of the people you take it away from.

As we get older we understand more and more how precarious and unpredictable life really is; we learn to appreciate how short and precious life really is.

Take a look at your life; take a look at your job; take a look at your time…

Take a look at the most important people in your life who love and respect you…

Take a look at the people you allow to feel more important than they are…

Decide who you want to spend your precious time with…

Decide who you want to give that time to…

Decide who you don’t want to give that time to…

The choice is yours as to where and who you spend your time with…

Please think about it, be mindful and choose it wisely because wasted time on the wrong people is time that is lost on the right people for a lifetime.

And no one should live with regret over having spent time with anything or anyone that is less important than the people who are.

Shower the people you love with love…

And don’t worry about the one’s you don’t.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

bad bosses 1

 

“When Dreams Come True”

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“A dreamer is a realist with faith.”  ~Anne Dennish~

I grew up thinking it was a bad thing to be called a dreamer, yet years ago I changed that way of thinking and began to embrace the word. I am a dreamer and proud of it.

I’m even prouder of my nephew, Sean Wotherspoon, who is proof that dreams come true. I’ve known this child since the day he was born and have watched him grow into an amazing young man who found his passion at a young age and turned his dreams into a reality.

Sean is the owner of three very successful “buy, sell and trade” stores called “RoundTwo” located in NYC, Hollywood, California and Richmond, Virginia. He also has several galleries for RoundTwo. His business is frequented by some of the biggest names around, yet fame and fortune never affected my nephew; he loves what he does and loves living his dream!

He designed the new Nike AirMax sneaker for 2018, and more recently, a toddler line of the shoe was added to the adult version. Sean has designed hats and t-shirts that match his Nike shoe.

Last night I watched a video as he walked the catwalk in NYC Fashion Week for the clothing company, “Clot.” I’m simply amazed at all that he does!

I’m sharing just a small bit of this with you today to remind you of this: “Dreams do come true!”

My nephew is living proof of that.

He is a dreamer, and I’d like to think he got that from me, but more importantly, he’s a dreamer that took a leap of faith in himself and his dream and went for it…

And look where he is now…

Dreams come true…

Go out and make your dreams a reality…

It’s a good thing.

Wishing you love, light, and dreams come true,

~Anne Dennish~

The Dreamers: my nephew and me!