Stop what you’re doing for a moment and look around. Take a look at the beauty that surrounds you, of the family and friends that love you, and at the wonder of nature. It doesn’t matter where you live, there’s beauty to be found everywhere if you just allow your eyes to see it.
Enjoy this new day. Take some time for yourself. Breathe in, still your mind, and find some time to “stop and smell the roses.”
It’s been a tough week. I was upset and heartbroken over the slanderous comments made on my website. And I was angry. I was angry that someone caused me to feel such strong, negative emotions.
After a day or two of constantly thinking about the “who” behind it all I remembered the lessons I have learned along this journey of life: in order to release the anger and hurt I was feeling I had to forgive them.
And when I forgave them I took back my power and control because I took away their ability to hurt me. Allowing someone to upset you is giving them the power and control to do it, and trust me, they know that. They know that they “got to you” and they revel in it. They actually enjoy it. And they’ll keep doing it to you until you stop letting it get to you.
Listen, it’s a hard thing to forgive someone who hurt you. All I wanted to do in the last few days was to call her and talk it over. Yet while that sounds like a sensible answer to the problem, I knew deep down inside that it would provide her with the confirmation she wanted in the first place: that she got to me and she got my attention. It would have been confirmation to me that I allowed her to.
And I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t give her the power and control over my life and my emotions just because they don’t have control over their own.
It’s sad to know that there are people like that in the world, yet this is why I write what I do. I try to change someone’s perspective on how they see the world; I try to show them that kindness is key; and I try to share the lessons I’ve learned on how to be the best person you can be. I share the lessons I’ve learned on forgiveness, on the importance of loving yourself, and that anything and everything you want in this life is possible if you believe in yourself.
Good things come from good energy and emotions. Negativity breeds negativity, and positivity breeds positivity.
I’m not out to change anyone. I write my life experiences to show others that there is always hope and that we can change if we want to. I try to share with others that I learned that when you want something in your life to change that that change begins with YOU.
I’m not about rules or telling anyone what to do. I’m just a girl who wants to make a positive impact on another person’s life, because if I can do that, there will be a positive impact on the people that surround them.
I took this unpleasant and hurtful experience and turned it into a lesson of strength. I used it to write what needs to be written: the truth. I used this pain and turned it into one of peace in my forgiveness towards them.
Those comments fueled the fire within me to stand up for myself and to stand in my truth. I know those comments about me were untrue and I never should have let them hurt me, yet the pain brought more: it made me stronger and even more determined to make a positive impact in the world.
This girl is on fire and my mission is to keep writing about kindness, respect, forgiveness and strength. I’m on fire to write about taking back the control and power that I had so easily given to someone else, because the truth is, we should NEVER give that away. Yet it happens by a comment or a hurtful action by another.
I’ve learned that the next time that happens I will stand in my truth and not allow them to cause me any negative feelings. No one will ever take away my power again and I will be diligent in keeping my emotions and my life in MY control.
Forgiveness is one of the most difficult, yet most powerful tools we can use. Forgiveness will free YOU from the negative feelings that someone caused you. Forgiveness will give you peace in knowing that you let it go…and hopefully, you let THEM go as well.
Wish them love and light and pray for their own healing…and then drop it.
Move forward.
Never let anyone steal your power and control. Never let them know they caused you the pain that they had hoped they would.
Forgive them.
Forget them.
And remember, no one can hurt you unless you let them.
From this day forward, this girl is on fire and I won’t stop until I’ve made the difference in this world that I hope and want to make.
If you’ve been following my latest blogs then you’ll understand this story. Last weekend someone made a comment on one of my blogs. It was hurtful and untrue. As I looked at the IP address I realized that it belonged to the same person that did the same thing to me in August, commenting on me personally rather than on my writing.
My heart sank on Saturday morning when I saw a degrading comment about “me.” I traced the IP address to the vicinity of where it came from and realized that it was from the same one back in August, and sadly, it’s someone I know.
I appreciate and welcome any comments about my writing…I appreciate comments to tell me how I can be a better writer. I don’t take offense at construction criticism about my writing, but I do take offense to being publicly slandered about “who” someone says I am. And I’m hurt to know it’s someone I know and that “someone” knows I’m not anything that they said I was. My character was defamed, my reputation slandered. And I was hurt because I couldn’t understand, let alone wrap my head around why this person would do that to me.
Yet something made them do it and it hurt. They hid behind false names and false email addresses, yet an IP address doesn’t lie. I knew who it was.
Some may say I took the comment too personally, yet I felt slightly threatened and definitely slandered. Since the comment was made public on my website, I’ll share it with you:
Did it ever occur to you that you reflect all that you are, that perhaps you create all these situations because of your own self loathing?
You seem to gave a central theme in all your blogs that portray you as a victim, not as an enlightened, loving spiritual being. Good luck on your “project” …looks like you have a lot of self work to do.
I deleted the other comments the moment I read them in August, but the theme and the tone were the same. It was a direct attack on me as a person, not me as a writer. It was the voice of someone who hated me and the life I’m living with my love, Rob. It was someone that is so angry with me that they wanted to publicly slander me.
And the truth is, I’m not any of those things. I’m not self-loathing and I definitely do not play a victim. I try and take all my experiences I’ve gone through, the good and the bad, and share them with others in the hope that I can help them through when there was no one to help me. I want to inspire and motivate people; I want to spread kindness and hope; I want to make a difference in the world and in another human beings life; I want to try and make the world a better place.
When I saw that comment on Saturday morning it felt as though someone punched me in the stomach. When I realized it was from the same person from months ago, my heart sank…because it was then I realized who it was.
I spoke to the police and knew what I could do, but then I thought about the rest of that family. They shouldn’t pay for that person’s feelings towards me. I was angry and I was hurt. Even as I write this I would love to sit down with this person and ask them why they did that to me. Why did they hate me so much?
And then I realized the answer: some people are so unhappy in their own lives that they take it out on others; they want what someone else has and if they can’t have it, they’ll try and ruin it; they’re jealous, they’re insecure and they’re lost souls with no direction. They don’t understand that they can have all those things on their own but they can’t or won’t because they don’t love themselves, don’t respect themselves, and would rather play the martyr than to do the work on themselves to have the best life they can have.
I’m not angry anymore because I forgave them. I had to. Holding onto the anger keeps it alive and gives that person and what they did control and power over me, and I won’t have it. So I decided to forgive them, and let go of the anger. I didn’t call them or let them know I forgive them, I forgave them for ME! And once I did that I realized that there was no more anger, and by forgiving them I took back my power and my control.
Today I forgave them but I’ll never forget the three comments they wrote about me. I’ll forgive them but I’ll never forget what they said. Never.
And now you know why I am on a mission of spreading the word to all of you to be kind to one another.
The world will never get better with hate and jealousy, but there’s a good chance it will change with kindness.
I’m on a roll this week about kindness. Last week I was the target of people being incredibly “unkind” to me. It saddens me to know that people can be that way, yet we’re all wired differently.
Kindness is free. It doesn’t cost any money and it doesn’t cost a lot of time. In fact, being kind to someone else actually gives a gift back to you: it makes you feel good that you made someone else feel good by being kind to them.
Yet there are those that choose not to be kind; they choose to be mean and hurtful. They choose to judge you without knowing who you. And some choose to be mean because they do know you and want what you have: in other words, they’re jealous. Or they’re insecure. Or they just want to be mean because they hate you.
I try to spread kindness wherever and to whomever I can. I love to make someone smile, or feel better, or laugh out loud! I love to be there with a listening ear and shoulder to cry on if someone needs me. I love to sit with someone who doesn’t want to be alone.
But someone was mean to me last week. They wrote things about me that weren’t true. They hid behind a false name and email address. They couldn’t say those things to me in person because they didn’t have the courage to do so; they are a coward.
They are mean. They are unkind. They are hurtful.
And they must be one sad soul to want to hurt someone else.
I forgive them for what they did, and I can only do that so I don’t stay angry. But I will never forget what they said and did.
I believe in my heart that if everyone in the world was kind we’d be living in a much different world.
Be kind, share random acts of kindness to others, and be kind in the things you say.
Kindness can change the world.
As I always say: “It’s time to make a difference and we can make a difference together.”
It’s been a quiet weekend at my house. My love and I have been relaxing and enjoying each other’s company with no distractions. We’ve ordered take-out, watched movie after movie, and just “chilled out.” We enjoyed the “sweetness of doing nothing.”
How did we do that?
We turned off our phones, our computers, and our social media. We gave ourselves some time without the distraction of electronics and maybe that’s why it’s been so peaceful. I took this time off from writing, he took this took time off from work (after all, it is the weekend!) At first I thought it was too quiet, yet I realized that this is the time that’s so important for ALL of us to have now and again…or as often as you can.
It’s more than quality time together, it also allows our minds to be still and free of texts, phone calls, and social media posts, all things that can potentially add stress to us. It’s time to just “be.”
It’s time needed to find our balance in life again and ground ourselves. It’s time needed to rest our bodies and still our minds. It’s time needed to relax and to dream. It’s time needed to be free of outside influences that can affect our mood and our day.
Tomorrow it will be back to work, to writing, to our lives filled with electronics…but for today, I’m going to embrace every moment without the sound of a notification, a text or a phone call…I’m going to embrace the sound of the voices of my family.
You get up in the morning and get ready to start your day, whether it’s work or getting the kids off to school or simply going through your daily routine. You try and stay away from stress, drama and toxic people, yet somehow those things seem to slip into your day and into your life. You feel upset, sad, drained and tired…and then the world steps in to show you what’s really important: “the people in it.”
We’ve all seen the devastation in Texas and now all of us sit listening to the radio and watching the news to see where Hurricane Irma is going to hit and who is going to be affected by it.
Yet we’re all affected by it, whether we’re in the wake of the storm or on the outside trying to help those in it.
Let’s take a good look at the world and all that’s happened in the last week and what’s about to happen this week. Let’s focus on keeping each other in our prayers and helping those get through it.
Forget the drama, the stress, and the toxic people…they’re a waste of time and don’t deserve our time. There are people in this world that are hurting and that do deserve our time and help.
Please take a moment to say a prayer for Texas and to keep those in the path of Hurricane Irma in our prayers.
And remember: “it’s time to make a difference and we can make a difference together.”
“Life is always changing, it’s time to turn the page; so the story continues and it’s mine to create. It’s all an adventure, my life is a song; I know where I’ve been, not where I’m going but I’m dancing along.” ~Anne Dennish~
My life has been a series of ups and downs, adventures and restlessness, good times and bad, yet through it all I’ve accepted that it was meant to be that way. All those moments happened to teach me a lesson. They happened because I wasn’t living my life as I should and there’s times that the Universe steps in and whacks us with a two by four to “wake us up.” It stops us dead in our tracks to feel the pain and understand why it hurts. After all, we feel what we allow.
And when pain and heartache happen it’s because we allowed the behaviors that led up to that moment happen. We allowed someone to cross our boundaries and treat us in a way we shouldn’t be treated.
We lost sight of ourselves and in the process of caring for everyone else we forgot to care for ourself. We forgot to love ourself first, to respect ourself, to take care of ourself, and when other’s see that we’ve forgotten that, they cross our boundaries.
We have to draw a line in the sand that shouldn’t be crossed, yet maybe we should be drawing a line in the cement.
Broken hearts and pain don’t happen overnight. Sure, we feel blindsided when it happens yet when it does you begin to look at the behaviors that led up to it and suddenly you’re not so surprised or shocked that someone hurt you. You let them disrespect you long before they hurt you; you let them love you less than you loved yourself because their ego was larger than their heart; and you began to blame yourself and made excuses for them.
Losing sight of yourself and seeing only them strengthens their ego and robs you of your self-esteem.
But there’s hope in the heartache and purpose in the pain.
The hope is that the broken heart will mend stronger and the purpose in the pain is to teach you a lesson about yourself. It’s to bring the focus back onto “you.”
Life is always changing and the change is up to you. Your life is your story and you are the author. You create what you want.
Write your story well and if you need to make some edits along the way be sure they’re for your Highest Good.
The internet is filled with a mix of emotions over last nights’ tragedy in England, from anger and hatred to sadness. The world can feel so safe until something rocks our world and fills us with fear.
It seems that when tragedy strikes there are those that will say to “hug your children more, say I love you to those you love and be grateful for each day you are gifted,” yet I say we should be that way everyday. It shouldn’t take a tragedy to open our eyes to the life we are blessed to have and to be grateful for our loved ones.
So today let us all join together in compassion and kindess, love and understanding for the world. Let’s pray for England, for an end to violence in the world, and more importantly, let us pray for each other.
It’s amazing what you can see when you look at the moon; it’s amazing what you can see when you allow yourself to believe in something bigger than facts and reality. It’s amazing to understand that there is life after death, and even more amazing to hear and feel your loved ones after they’ve passed.
It’s a gift to believe, and a gift of comfort, yet for some, if not most, fear prevents those very things we need to feel that comfort from coming in. Fear keeps us in the facts, unable to fathom that there is a spiritual world and spiritual realm outside of that. Fear of the opinion of others’ thinking we’re crazy because we can see and feel things that they can’t keeps the door from the other side closed, when in reality, we want to keep it open.
So we start with baby steps; we open it a crack. We want to see and believe, but we want proof. And trust me, proof is there, but it’s the programming of our human mind that tells us it couldn’t be so.
But it is…it is absolutely so.
I’ve lost many people I’ve loved throughout the years, and two in particular in the last few months. Did I cry over their passing? Absolutely. I cried at MY loss, not theirs. I believe that the other side, which I believe to be Heaven, is the place where they are whole, they are young, and they are not in pain. Why would I cry over them being in a better place? Why? Because I miss them; their passing changed my daily routine and changed my life; it left a void in my life and an ache in my heart. I miss them because I want them here. I want their voice, I want their touch, I want their human connection.
But the human connection is gone, and thanks to my many spiritual teachers throughout my life, I’ve learned that while a human connection is personal, a spiritual connection is even stronger, and will last until our last breath. A spiritual connection means that they know the answers to the questions; they have our back as our guardian angel; they see us all the time and come to visit at the times we need them most; and that their love for us was made stronger on the other side because of our love for them here. Love is the strongest emotion there is, the one that gives us strength; the one that fills us with light; the one that can never be taken away. Love is truly all we need.
On the other side we don’t need to call on them, they always know when to come. They come through our dreams, our thoughts, our memories; a familiar smell or favorite song; they come through a laugh and they come through a smile; they can even come in the moon and the stars, the ocean and the mountains. It’s your love here on earth that keeps them connected to you in heaven. Love never dies with a body; love lives on within the soul.
The messages of loved ones can be heard when you can still your mind and believe that when you hear them, it’s truly them speaking. When you feel a random touch, it’s them. When a tear rolls down your face thinking of them, it is they who dry it. When you feel scared and lonely and miss them so deeply, it is them that brings you a memory to think about to lessen your loneliness.
Talk to them; listen to them; feel them and love them. Miss them all you want, because they understand, yet they want you to know that they’re okay, and that you will be too. Love isn’t meant to be painful; love is meant to bring joy and peace. They understand your missing them, but they also know it’s through missing them that you talk about the memories, and that is what keeps them alive. That is what keeps their spirit alive, and it’s their spirit that you carry within you. On earth they were in your presence; in heaven they’re in your soul.
I’ve seen the man in the moon with his silly smile, his loving eyes and his tilted glasses on his nose; I’ve seen the woman in the stars with her arms stretched out to hold me; I’ve heard my friends in the sunrise and the sunset with their voice of reason and tone of reassurance; I’ve felt the touch of my loved ones as a gentle breeze blew through me.
I’ve seen them all and they were all at peace.
And they wrapped me in all the love they have for me…now and forever.
Wishing you love and light,
~Anne Dennish~
Lyrics by Anne Dennish – Music and Vocals by Sutton Thomas 2016