“No Response Is A Powerful Response”

I love conversation and communication, as most who know me would tell you, yet sometimes situations arise in which communication is NOT key. And it’s not key because of the person provoking the situation. I believe that we are in control of our lives, of how we feel,  how we react or respond, and who we allow in our circle. We try and live our best life by setting healthy boundaries, yet there are those who don’t respect the boundaries we make. They cross the line and do as they please. They gossip, they spread lies and they try and make your life miserable. It’s “disrespect” at its’ finest.

So now what?

I used to believe that communication with someone crossing the line was key, yet there are those that want you to do that because it fuels their drama and truth be told, you’re giving them what they want: your attention.

And I made a choice not to give my attention to someone who doesn’t deserve it. It’s a waste of my precious time and filled with negative energy, and in the end, most times, there is no resolution.

I’ve learned that the best thing for me to do is NOT give the situation and the person my precious time and energy; life is too short to be wasted on the drama that another person causes. It’s their insecurities and jealousy that cause them to behave in that way.

I agree that “no response is a powerful response.” 

I’ll communicate with the people important to me, but I will not engage with someone who isn’t. 

I can’t control the drama that someone else is trying to cause in my life, but I can control how I respond.

And my response is “no response.”

And it’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“The Lesson In The Pain”

I find a lesson in everything…even in pain, and the last 11 days have been no exception. I’ve been battling severe sciatica. Some days the pain has been excruciating, other days it’s been manageable, yet throughout the last 11 days of being able to do nothing but rest and take it easy, I’ve found myself changing.

Life and all its’ little problems were still knocking at my door, begging to come in with all their stress and drama, but guess what? I didn’t answer the door. I left all that “negative stuff” on the front porch, knowing that it would soon go away if I ignored it…and it did.

Living with pain is a horrible thing, yet it taught me that nothing else mattered except my healing. The pain reminded me that I’m just as important as anyone else, and that this time was mine to rest and get well. And it taught me to let go of things quicker and easier…and be done with them.

I guess you could say this amount of pain for this long of a time changed my behavior and perspective on situations that bring me stress or are filled with drama. I see them differently and learned to quickly dismiss them, not let them bother me, and focus on what’s important: my family, my loved ones, my tribe and ME!

I’m on the mend and it’s been a long, painful 11 days, yet it wasn’t in vain and was for a reason: to learn another life lesson. And while my leg still hurts, I can tell you that my heart doesn’t. I can’t worry about what I can’t change in others, I can only change how I react to them.

And sometimes “no reaction” is the best “reaction” to someone trying to bring their stress and drama into your life.

Try it.

It’s a good thing!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

“Love Yourself Enough”

“Love yourself enough to what’s best for you.”

Try it and watch what happens…

It’s a good thing. 

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“Keeping It Positive”

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I realized something yesterday morning: that for the past few weeks all I’ve been saying is negative things, which is unlikely for me. Yet, I’m as human as anyone else and sometimes we forget to pay close attention to our thoughts and words.

Yesterday I sat in front of my laptop wondering what to write. I found myself saying “I hate having writers block; why does my foot still hurt; why is everything taking so long to happen?”

Then I realized that I was putting all that negative stuff out there all on my own. At that moment I changed my thinking and choice of words and turned it into: “I’m writing everyday; my foot is healing day by day; and things are happening just as they should”

You see, sometimes we lose sight of our thoughts and words. We forget to keep them all positive, yet when you notice what it is your saying and thinking you can change it. You can change it to positive thoughts and words.

I remind myself today that “everything happens as it should, when it should and how it should.”

And I remind myself that I do the best I can everyday.

More importantly, I remind myself that negative thoughts and words are to replaced with “I can, I will, I am.”

Go easy on yourself and remember that you are in control of your thoughts, your words and your actions.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“Just Stop!”

Stop…just stop! Stop stressing and worrying, stop hurting and feeling sad; you can’t control anyone other than your self. The Universe sends us messages in many different ways; you have to trust yourself and your Higher Power, that they are opening your eyes and bringing changes into your life that are best for YOU!

Trust the journey and embrace the ride…

and breathe.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“The New Year Revelations”

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I gave up on making New Year resolutions years ago, and replaced them with what I call my “New Year’s Revelations.” It’s all the things I learned throughout the year that I will carry into the new year with me, in the hopes that I don’t make the same mistakes. In other words, my New Year’s Revelations are my “waking up” moments of seeing the truth in myself and others’, of learning from my mistakes, and learning more about myself.

I use New Year’s Eve as my time of reflection back onto the year that is about to end. I look back at all that happened, good and bad. It’s a time to count my blessings of the year, and to be sure that I had many more gains than losses. It’s a time to look back at where I may have fallen short and try to understand why. It’s a time to look back at relationships that ended with honesty and respect, and of letting them go. It’s taking my accountability for the ending, and moving on with no regrets and no intentions of ever going back.

It’s the night I say good-bye to all those people, places and things that no longer serve my highest good; that didn’t bring out the best in me; that caused me stress and heartache; that took advantage of me. And then I look at why it happened. Did I allow boundaries to be crossed? Did I allow their behaviors that hurt me? Did I put myself in a situation that broke me in two? And when I can answer that with an open and honest truth of “yes,” I can then begin to understand and see the lesson in it.

I learned many things this year, and I’d like to share a few with you. These are my top “waking up” moments, or “revelations,” if you will:

  • I learned that the old saying “keep your friends close and your enemies even closer” is an absolute lie! Nothing good comes from surrounding yourself with people who are negative and toxic, manipulative and untrustworthy. If you think you’re an enemy of someone, or they are an enemy to you, definitely keep them far away!
  • I learned that the other old saying “you always hurt the ones you love” may be truth, but not such a good idea. Trust me, hurting the ones you love will not serve you well.
  • I always knew how precious life was, especially having survived breast cancer, yet this year after losing some very special people in my life I’ve realized just how precious it is. No day is promised, and if you have a chance to spend time with those you love, do it! You may miss out on a chance that you’ll never get back.
  • I learned to say I love you to the ones’ I love more often, and to hug them all tighter.
  • I learned that if something seems too good to be true, most often times, it is.
  • I learned that if I do anything for the wrong reasons, I’ll soon learn those “wrong reasons” the hard way.
  • That no matter what anyone says, I will always be a dreamer and will always dream big! Why would anyone settle for less
  • And my biggest “revelation” was that I need to stand up for myself more, speak my truth always, and walk away from people or situations that are not good for me.

All in all, the past year has been filled with more “ups” than “downs,” and while a few people have had to leave my life, a few more amazing ones’ walked in. I know for sure that when you get rid of anything negative or toxic, you open the door to the positive coming in, and that’s what I did this past year, hard as some of it may have been.

As I close out 2016, I say good-bye to a few close friends and family that passed on, and I know in my heart I now have some amazing guardian angels watching over me. My heart has hurt over their passing, but the joy and love that they left me with has helped me through

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RIP Tom Contreras  1956-2016

I’ve said good-bye to a few friends who were no longer welcome in my circle, yet they taught me what true friends are…and aren’t. I’m grateful for the lessons they taught me.

And as I get ready to welcome in the year of 2017, I look towards it with the promise of more dreams to catch, more life to celebrate, and more adventures to begin. I look forward to another year with my love and all the joy he’s brought into my life, and to another year of our life together growing as one.

To all of you, I wish you adventure, dreams come true, love, light and all the good that you are willing to receive. Happy New Year and may your “New Year’s Revelation” be your guide into this New Year of 2017!

Live your life to the fullest…live your life in love…live your life!

And make it absolutely amazing!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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Happy New Year from my love and I to all of you!

“Live on Love”

“Live on love.” That’s what my grandmother always said, and it’s how I try to live my life every day.

As I celebrated my birthday yesterday, I got the call to tell me that she had passed away, just two weeks before her 99th birthday! Wow, what a blessing to live that long!

Most would think I’d be upset that her passing fell on my celebration of life, yet I’m not. Yes, I shed some tears, but I also thought it was a beautiful thing that she chose that day to go home! She taught me to love life and live it! Up until the day she died she was living her life to the fullest, and isn’t that what we should all be doing?

I watch and listen to all this drama in other people’s lives and I can’t help but wonder what the point is. Life is precious and life get’s shorter as we get older. Why would anyone want to waste one precious moment on anger, drama, gossip and pettiness? Why wouldn’t you choose to live in the moment and walk away from such nonsense?

I’ll tell you what, as I get older I’m appreciating every day and every wonderful person that is in my life. I have so many teacher’s in my life to remind me of that, and my biggest one is my love, Rob. He’s seen me in moments of tears and hurt that someone has caused me, yet always reminds me that it’s their problem, not mine; that it’s their unhappiness and misery that makes them resent our happy life. And he’s right.

I ask you today to honor my Grandmother and “live on love!” Live your life through, around and with love. Live your life to the fullest and walk away from the people that cause you any less happiness and love that you deserve! The more you love life, the more life will love you back. Thank you, Grandma, for teaching me that.

“Live on love” today and watch what life hands you back!

 

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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Author of “Waking Up”  copyright 2016