“Peace, Love and Joy”

May you find peace, love and joy in your life every single day.

It’s a beautiful way to live.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“The Lost Art of Loyalty”

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 While I was in Malibu a few years ago finishing up my book, “Waking Up,” I was working on a short story about “loyalty.” I asked many people what it meant to them, and it soon became a topic that no one had a definitive answer for. In fact, a few people were annoyed when I asked their opinion; seemed it stuck in their mind and made them search for an answer; an answer that they could never find.

It also made them question the people in their life…and it made me question those in mine as well.

So what is loyalty? Does it have a different meaning for everyone? Do we make our own rules as to what loyalty is or is there a universal rule?

I start with my own loyalty. If you’re in my life and I love and care for you, I’ll always be loyal, unless you cross a boundary, in which case, I won’t strike back and become disloyal to you, I’ll simply walk away. 

Next is the loyalty of those in my life. In healthy relationships of any kind, boundaries must bad bosses 1be set for respect between each person. What bothers one person in the relationship may not bother another, yet communicating that to each other is key in the loyalty department. If you cross a boundary with someone in your life, you’ve just proved that you’re not loyal. 

You see, “loyalty” is a tough one. The only answer I could get out of most people I spoke to about it was when they referenced the loyalty of a dog. A dog will always be loyal, yet my question made many wonder why humans can’t be the same.

We can, that is, if we choose to.

My loyalty lies with my love, my children and my closest of friends. And that loyalty goes beyond me; if you hurt those I love, my loyalty will have me walk out of your life as well. It doesn’t matter who you are. 

Not many people are willing to do that. Many feel that it’s not their problem when someone hurts the ones’ you love; as long as they weren’t disloyal it’s okay. But is it? If someone intentionally hurts your child, or your spouse or significant other, why would you want to be a part of their life? 

I think that’s where the confusion lies. I’ve been in that position before, where my loyalty was tested. It was a rough road between two people I care about, yet when push came to shove, my loyalty was with my love, not with the person who was hurting him. And I had to step out of that world with that other person, because my loyalty and my life is around him. Yes, feelings are hurt when you have to walk away from someone, yet in the end, it’s the right thing to do.

At least for me it was.

I know what loyalty is to me, and I won’t settle for anyone in my life being less loyal to me. We attract what we put out there, and for anyone that knows me, they know I have their back. They know I’ll walk through fire for them, defend them, honor them, love them, protect them, and more importantly, I will walk away from anyone who hurts them. End of story.

“Loyalty” is much more than how you treat someone; it’s also about how other’s treat the people in your life and whether or not you accept that behavior. The choice is yours.

Is “loyalty” a lost art or have we forgotten the importance of it?

“Loyalty” is one of the strongest qualities in any relationship because it breeds trust and respect, and isn’t that what every good relationship should be built on?

Think about it.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“Love Me Through It”

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The seas of life have been rough lately and I find myself trying to ride the waves. I’m patiently waiting for the swells to subside to a calm surf, yet it’s hard to see through the spray. It’s at that moment that I know I need to get a little help and advice from someone I can always count on to weather the storm with me: my love.

He’s one of the most no-nonsense, upfront and direct people I know. He doesn’t skirt around the issue; he attacks it head on. He doesn’t tolerate drama; he ignores it. And when he finds out that what he believed to be true isn’t, he moves on and leaves those people behind.

And he’s my “voice of reason” when I find myself in situations that mentally and emotionally drain me and upset me. He’s the guy that reminds me that I can’t fix anyone, solve their problems, or change their perspective. He’s the guy that tells me that he knows how much I want to help some people, but some people don’t really want the help, just the attention. And he reminds not to let “their” problem become “my” problem, because eventually it will become “our” problem. I have to admit it: he’s right!

So in the midst of a conversation this weekend with my love, one in which I asked his advice and “words of wisdom” about, he said something absolutely beautiful to me, and it’s what he said that prompted me to write this piece.

He said that while he can’t take away my hurt, he can “love me through it.”

What a simple, yet profound thing to say. We can’t fix anyone who’s hurting, but we can certainly be there for them to love them through it.

And I have to say, the hurt seems a bit less and the healing a bit easier when you’re blessed to have someone who will “love you through it.”

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

“It’s A New Day”

Every so often someone will tell me that they had a “bad day,” and sometimes I find myself saying it as well. Yet in the grand scheme of life, is there really a bad day? Sure, not every day goes as we had planned or hoped. We receive bad news, we struggle with problems not of our own, we find ourselves drained, both emotionally and physically. I guess that can justify being a “bad day.”

I know I’ve had much more of my share in the last month, yet I have to keep reminding myself to be grateful for even the bad days, because truth is, we had another day, whether it was good or bad.

We were gifted yet another day of life, and another day to “do it better than the day before.”

Embrace all your days and make the most of them. Be grateful for another day to spend with your loved ones. Wake up in the morning knowing that anything is possible, and count your blessings from the day as you go to sleep at night.

You just need to have faith and believe.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“The Perfect Christmas”

Christmas is fast approaching and the countdown is on. Final decorations are being done on and around the house and wish lists of gifts are being bought. It’s another year of making the “perfect Christmas” happen for your family and friends.

Yet is all this preparation what makes it perfect? Will you and yours remember the decorations and gifts? Will you remember the table and the meal?

Or will you remember the “imperfections?”

Will you remember the year that mom’s arm got caught inside the turkey as she was taking the giblets out? Will you remember the year you broke your arm on Christmas Eve only to wake up to a new skateboard the next day? Will you remember the year the entire family had the stomach virus and all camped out in the living room? Will you remember your sister running down the stairs on Christmas morning only to miss the bottom step?

You see, it’s the “imperfections” that make it perfect. It’s not the matching Christmas pajamas and the family Christmas cards, it’s the family. It’s not the beautifully set Christmas table with a delicious dinner, it’s the people who sit around it.

While “perfection” can be captured in a picture, it’s the “imperfections” which are captured in your heart. They become the stories shared and passed down to other generations. They become the tradition of storytelling and the legacy for our children.

As the years pass, so does the idea of the “perfect” Christmas, and as we grow older, we begin to realize that what means the most is the memory of the “imperfections” and the loved ones who were part of them. Life changes, children move away, and sometimes the many faces that once sat around our table are no longer with us, but their memories, their stories and their love always surrounds us.

And sometimes we forget that. I see so many people writing about their sadness in missing the “old days,” yet I think that is such a waste of energy. I know that there are those I’m missing, yet I choose to embrace the memories as stories to share with my children. I choose to embrace this time, these loved ones who are in my life now, and who will be around my table this year.

Memories aren’t meant to bring sadness, they’re meant to bring joy! And for those feeling an ache in their heart, please try and remember the love, the joy, and the memories of those not present this year. They gifted you with all those things and more.

Take a moment during this busy holiday time to remember the “imperfections” of Christmas’ past, and look forward to the “imperfections” to come!

After all, the “perfect Christmas” lives in your heart.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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