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“Chemo Healed The Cancer But The Cancer Healed Me”

/ Anne Dennish / Leave a comment

My last book, “Waking Up: Lessons Learned From My Adventures With Life and Breast Cancer” was born over two years ago while lying on a radiation table for breast cancer.

I’m the type of person that loves meeting people because every single one of us has a story…we ARE a story! Some may not believe that, yet as a writer, I know it’s true. I was out to dinner with my love one night, along with his cousin and his love, and a table full of people I had never met. Yet by the end of the night, I knew them well.

You see, that’s the beauty of paying attention to people and speaking to them, yet more importantly, LISTENING to them. They were laughing at me last night when I said that the whole night of conversations was indeed a story!

So it’s no surprise that “Waking Up” was born; the idea may have begun on a radiation table, yet the stories were already taking shape in my mind, and for the last two years of writing it, more stories were born. Every story is true; most of them are of my personal experiences, and there are a few born out of situations with someone else who graciously allowed me to write about it

Yet, here’s what that one moment that woke me up was: “breast cancer!”

Yes, I had been on a spiritual journey for years, but finding out I had cancer was a big kick in the ass! I realized that as much as I had learned over the years, the lessons were far from over. Breast cancer changed my life and how I live it. That tumor was all the things I never said out loud, all the pain of allowing people to treat me badly. It was everything I never said that I should have, so I made a deal with the cancer: “I’ll open my mouth and use my voice, I’ll make better choices of who I surround myself with, I’ll rid myself of people and situations that make me feel less than good, and I’ll take all of this and write about it to help someone else as long as you leave my body when the time is right.”

I guess the cancer agreed with the deal, because it held up its’ end of the bargain. I did all those things and it left me the day they cut all that stuff out of my body. They did more than a lumpectomy on February 21st. As cancer and I were about to say good-bye that day, I could hear it speaking to me. Sounds crazy, but it wasn’t really. It said: “You’ve done the work and I know it wasn’t easy. I’m sorry to have had to come and visit you, but this journey is over. Remember the lessons, remember to love yourself, and finish up our deal: tell your lessons to everyone you can reach. I’m counting on you.”

Well, in a strange way, chemo may have healed my cancer, but my cancer healed me. It taught me more than I could imagined, and since then, I spread the word, I keep out as much drama and stress as I can, and I walk away from anyone or anything that tries to control and manipulate me. Cancer didn’t abuse me as much as some people have tried to, and I’m smarter because of all of it.

“Waking Up” is so much more than a book; it’s my heart and soul that simply wants to make a difference in someone’s life. Life get’s shorter as we get older, and my goal is to live everyday to the fullest, to show love and kindness to someone who needs it, and most importantly, to make someone laugh and smile.

Struggles will always happen in our lives, yet it’s your attitude and perspective that will handle it and teach you more than you could have ever imagined.  After all, “we don’t become who we are by chance; we become who we are by choice.”

Love your lessons, whether you like them or not, because in the end, miracles happen!

“Chemo healed the cancer but the cancer healed me.”

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

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“Keeping It Positive”

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I realized something yesterday morning: that for the past few weeks all I’ve been saying is negative things, which is unlikely for me. Yet, I’m as human as anyone else and sometimes we forget to pay close attention to our thoughts and words.

Yesterday I sat in front of my laptop wondering what to write. I found myself saying “I hate having writers block; why does my foot still hurt; why is everything taking so long to happen?”

Then I realized that I was putting all that negative stuff out there all on my own. At that moment I changed my thinking and choice of words and turned it into: “I’m writing everyday; my foot is healing day by day; and things are happening just as they should”

You see, sometimes we lose sight of our thoughts and words. We forget to keep them all positive, yet when you notice what it is your saying and thinking you can change it. You can change it to positive thoughts and words.

I remind myself today that “everything happens as it should, when it should and how it should.”

And I remind myself that I do the best I can everyday.

More importantly, I remind myself that negative thoughts and words are to replaced with “I can, I will, I am.”

Go easy on yourself and remember that you are in control of your thoughts, your words and your actions.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“Go With The Flow”

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My apologies to all of you for my page having been so quiet, but life has a way of sneaking up on us and slowing us down…and that’s what happened to me in the last few weeks.

I had a few trips to the ER for a swollen Achilles tendon which put me on crutches and strict instructions to stay off my feet for a week or two. That was tough, I’ll admit, to have to sit with my foot elevated, watching mindless television day in and day out. I didn’t last a week or two, but a few days in my foot was feeling better.

Next was a beautiful family wedding on the beach which lasted for the weekend. My foot was feeling good enough to throw on low heels and dance with my love all night. The next morning I would find myself with a few numb toes and it was off to the ER yet again. This time it was torn ligaments and again, instructions to stay off my foot as much as possible.

In the midst of all of this I was getting my youngest back to junior year of high school and my other son off to college. They didn’t need much help but as a mom, I wanted to be there when they left for the day and here when they got home.

I was frustrated, to say the least, at having to say “no” to certain situations which I knew would take a toll on my healing foot. I was mad at myself for not heeding the strict instructions from the doctor. And I was suffering from a long “writers block.”

And then I began to realize that this was a test of patience, of will, and of strength. It was the Universe telling me to slow down, and it was “life” teaching me that I need to remember to “go with the flow.”

All too often we want to control our life and all that happens within it, and while that is certainly true at times, that we DO have control over our life, sometimes our life takes control of US when we’re not paying enough attention to what’s best for us; what’s best for our Highest Good.

And that’s what happened to me.

My foot is feeling better, my writers block is unblocking, and the house seems to be back in balance again. It was a rough road, but once I realized why it was all happening, I began to relax and accept what was and what will be once I do.

Sometimes  life has to remind us to just “go with the flow.”

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“What Happened To Humanity?”

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When did we stop thinking about the needs of other’s and only thinking of our own? When did we stop helping each other unless we had something to gain from it? When did we stop caring about each other? When did we start putting our own needs above someone who needs our help? When did we start being selfish instead of selfless?

It started when we stopped needing one another and only wanting one another when it was convenient, when it served us, when we had something to gain from it.

And that is the saddest thing in the world.

I can remember a time in my life when I had nothing and five children to take care of. It was the kindness of my closest friends that helped me out during that time and expected nothing in return. And when I had barely anything I still helped a family who needed my help. I sent food to their home during a difficult time and when those around me asked me: Why would you do that when you are in a bad way yourself? My answer was simple: because they were human beings who also needed the kindess of someone to help them, just like my friends had helped me. You see, that’s where the world has changed: we only give when it suits us; we only help when it makes us look good; we only need someone when we want something from us. The world stopped caring when they realized people took advantage of their kindness.

And again, that is the saddest thing in the world.

The world is in turmoil at the moment; there are hurricanes destroying lives, families and homes, and yet most people aren’t able to see the big picture: that the world needs us to stick together and help one another, and not because we “need” to but because we “want” to help another life feel better, get better and move on better.

If I do nothing else in this world except use my writing to help people understand and to try and make a difference in the world, then that is my success. My success comes from loving a stranger in need or a friend that needs my help, sharing what I have with them, helping them through a difficult time, listening to them and being there for them. My greatest success is when someone tells me that I made a difference in their life.

I sit here today with such a sadness and worry in my heart over friends on the islands that were impacted by Hurricane Irma, by someone I love that is in the hospital with no update on how they are from someone I know who is there and for a friend displaced by the hurricane that no one would help, so they helped themselves. For the love of God, what happened to kindness and respect? What happened to doing the right thing? What happened to thinking of other people and what they’re going through instead of focusing on only what we’re going through?

It’s time…it is absolutely time for everyone to get out of their own way and leave their selfish egos to the wayside. It’s time to see the big picture of what some are about to lose during these storms, to see what those did lose, to see what is happening to those around us. Does someone need a shoulder to lean on? Does someone need a listening ear? Does someone need a small, random act of kindness?

I know that I will do anything I can for anyone that needs me, whether it’s something big or something small. My mission in life is to make a difference in someone’s life and hopefully those random acts of kindness may actually make a difference in the world.

I know what I’m doing…what are YOU doing to make a positive difference in someone’s life, to help someone in need or to simply do what you can to make this world a better place?

There’s no better feeling in the world than to know you did something for someone else without expecting something in return.

The gift of helping someone else is how good you’ll feel when you do…and because you “wanted” to do it, not because you “needed” to do it for yourself.

Wishing you love, light, and peace,

~Anne Dennish~

“When The World Put’s Things In Perspective”

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You get up in the morning and get ready to start your day, whether it’s work or getting the kids off to school or simply going through your daily routine. You try and stay away from stress, drama and toxic people, yet somehow those things seem to slip into your day and into your life. You feel upset, sad, drained and tired…and then the world steps in to show you what’s really important: “the people in it.”

We’ve all seen the devastation in Texas and now all of us sit listening to the radio and watching the news to see where Hurricane Irma is going to hit and who is going to be affected by it.

Yet we’re all affected by it, whether we’re in the wake of the storm or on the outside trying to help those in it.

Let’s take a good look at the world and all that’s happened in the last week and what’s about to happen this week. Let’s focus on keeping each other in our prayers and helping those get through it.

Forget the drama, the stress, and the toxic people…they’re a waste of time and don’t deserve our time. There are people in this world that are hurting and that do deserve our time and help.

Please take a moment to say a prayer for Texas and to keep those in the path of Hurricane Irma in our prayers.

And remember: “it’s time to make a difference and we can make a difference together.”

Wishing you love, light and safety,

~Anne Dennish~

“Always Trust Your Gut”

/ Anne Dennish / 1 Comment

Just a little piece of advice for you all: trust your gut, trust your intuition and trust yourself. There seems to be so much dark energy floating around in the world lately that you have to be careful of who and what you’re surrounding yourself with, especially where the internet and social media are concerned.

If something feels wrong or feels “off,” know that it is.

If you know someone in your life or see a picture of someone and your intuition screams that there’s something dark or negative about them, know that there is.

Protect the beautiful being that you are and surround yourself with love and light. Stay away from the dark and negative energy that surrounds certain people, whether it’s in your life or through the internet.

Stay positive, stay grounded, and stay focused on your intuition and gut feelings…trust them. And please, when you get the feeling that something “isn’t right,” and you don’t understand why, trust that your gut knows why, even if you don’t know the reason yet.

I wish you all love,light, and protection from the negative and dark people that try to hurt you and the ones you love.

Be safe, be mindful, and “pay attention.”

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“Stop Looking Down”

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How many precious and important moments do you have to miss because you’re looking down at your phone to see the latest social media posts or text messages? Seriously, the world is becoming obsessed with life on the internet rather than the life in front of their eyes.

Everywhere you go you see people looking down at their phone no matter where they are: crossing the road, out on a date or family dinner, sitting on the couch and worst yet, while they’re driving.

I don’t want to miss out on one moment of the life I see in front of me, of the people I love around me, or the touch of my loved ones. I don’t want them to ever feel less important than what’s on my phone. I want them to know that they’re more important than any social media post or text message.

While our phones are a connection we have grown to need for communication with others, it should never become more important the people in your life. Everything in moderation, yet there are those who live their life on their phone, another point of sadness for me.

Stop “looking down” and open your eyes and  “look up, look around, and look at what’s in front of you.” You’ll be amazed at what you’ve been missing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“Losing Sight Of What Really Matters”

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Social media can be a great tool to keep in touch with old classmates as well as friends and family that live far away.

Yet it can become a way of life for some; the people that base their life on the “number of likes, friends and friend requests” they get, and that’s sad because they’ve lost sight of reality and the people in their life.

My own personal feeling is that I would rather have human touch, a voice, and an interaction with someone in the real, physical world. It means more to me when I get a call from a friend or they stop by to visit  me than by any “friend request” I receive from someone who never game me the time of day over the years or put the effort in to reach out to me.  While social media can be a great tool, especially if you use it for business, I don’t base my life on it. I don’t take every “friend” request just because I receive one. I’m more cautious on social media than I am in the real world.  My love, my children and my close friends mean the world to me and I will never let social media take priority over them.

So today I want you to look at your life with a different perspective and ask yourself these questions: Are you more in touch with the physical world and the people in it or are you more focused on your social media page? Where is your priority…with people you don’t know well on social media or with the ones you do know well in your life?

And the most important question to ask yourself is this: Do you spend more time on social media than you do with the people you love?

Don’t base your life on “likes and friends” on social media; base your life on the people in your life that love you.

I know I do.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“I Can See Clearly Now”

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Every so often I take a look at all the people in my life; the ones I trust and that I’m closest to. I take a good look and ask myself if I’m my true self with them or the self they need me to be. I ask myself if they bring out the best in me or I simply bring out the best in them. And I ask myself, am I a matter of convenience to them when they need my attention and love or are they there for me as well?

Those questions have been in my mind lately and I believe sometimes we have to look at the big picture because we find at that moment that we’re not living the life we need for our Highest Good. We’re in control of our happiness and in order to be all that we want to be and have the life we want we also have to see who we allow in it, because they have an impact on it.

I have a close knit group of people in my life and I’m always cautious when someone I don’t know well comes into it, whether it’s through a social circle or worse yet, through social media. I don’t take every friend request that comes my way, especially when I don’t know them or I know could cause a problem with my relationship.

So yesterday my eyes were suddenly open and seeing things differently, and I wondered why. Yet I knew why: the Universe wanted me to see and so that I could think about it and decide what I would do with what I saw and felt.

Communication between two people is key; trust is earned and maintained; and love is felt by actions, not simply words.

So as I rode in silence I heard the following questions:

  • Am I as much of a priority to someone as they are to me?
  • Do I care for someone more than they care for me?
  • Does my life revolve around all the people in it rather than it being on me?
  • Do they focus on me as much as I focus on them?
  • Do I support them more than they support me?
  • Does every conversation revolve around “them” and end when it begins to revolve around “me?”
  • Do they accept my feelings about something even though they don’t understand why I feel that way?
  • If they do something that hurts me do they do it again or do they love and respect me enough not to do it again, even if it doesn’t make sense to them.
  • Are they starting to find faults in me rather than positive things?
  • Do they put as much effort into me as they do to social media?

So many things to think about and I knew in my heart that I had the answers. And let me say that these questions pertain to all of your relationships, whether it’s a friendship, your family, or a relationship between two people.

And I ask to ask myself: Do they look different in my eyes now?

Now what do I do? What do you do if you find yourself in this position?

You take a leap of faith in who you are; you need to believe that you deserve to be treated as you treat them; and you need to communicate your feelings to them with love, kindness and respect.

And if you do these things and the response is not what you had hoped, then you’ll know the answers to your questions were right.

And that you need to turn the page in your book of life and move onto the next chapter…

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~