life

“Those Waking Up Moments”

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“It takes but one moment in your life that you find yourself waking up.”
~Anne Dennish~

 

“Waking Up” was the title of my last book and of the song I wrote to go with it. It was born out of my journey with breast cancer when a nurse asked me on my last day of treatment how the experience affected me. My answer was quick: “It woke me up.”

And it sure did.

But you don’t need to go through an illness to “wake up” to your life and how you’re living it.

I believe we all have those moments of “waking up” in which we see a situation differently…we see it with open eyes and more clarity. We see the truth. We see what’s working in our life and what isn’t. We see who belongs in our bubble and who doesn’t.

And then we have the choice to change it.

I’ve been going through a few “waking up” moments myself and while there are moments of sadness in what needs to be changed, there’s many more moments of happiness because of the change.

“Waking up” moments bring us life lessons to be learned so that we can live our life to the fullest and for our Highest Good.

Change isn’t always easy but I can promise you that it will always be worth it.

Because “YOU” are worth it!

Know the value of who you are…

It’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

it takes but one moment

“Embrace Your Inner Dreamer”

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“There is a dreamer who lives in a world,
Of endless possibilities…never any boundaries.” 

by Anne Dennish

 

Just a little something I wrote two years ago about my life as a dreamer, yet it’s a song for everyone who has a dream…and I hope that’s all of you. We all have a “dreamer” inside of us just waiting to break out.

I often write about setting boundaries in your life that are best for you, yet where dreams are concerned, there should be NO boundaries! Dream as big as you can and take that leap of faith to catch them!

It’s a good thing!

Enjoy my song called “The Dreamer.”

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

“The Lesson In The Pain”

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I find a lesson in everything…even in pain, and the last 11 days have been no exception. I’ve been battling severe sciatica. Some days the pain has been excruciating, other days it’s been manageable, yet throughout the last 11 days of being able to do nothing but rest and take it easy, I’ve found myself changing.

Life and all its’ little problems were still knocking at my door, begging to come in with all their stress and drama, but guess what? I didn’t answer the door. I left all that “negative stuff” on the front porch, knowing that it would soon go away if I ignored it…and it did.

Living with pain is a horrible thing, yet it taught me that nothing else mattered except my healing. The pain reminded me that I’m just as important as anyone else, and that this time was mine to rest and get well. And it taught me to let go of things quicker and easier…and be done with them.

I guess you could say this amount of pain for this long of a time changed my behavior and perspective on situations that bring me stress or are filled with drama. I see them differently and learned to quickly dismiss them, not let them bother me, and focus on what’s important: my family, my loved ones, my tribe and ME!

I’m on the mend and it’s been a long, painful 11 days, yet it wasn’t in vain and was for a reason: to learn another life lesson. And while my leg still hurts, I can tell you that my heart doesn’t. I can’t worry about what I can’t change in others, I can only change how I react to them.

And sometimes “no reaction” is the best “reaction” to someone trying to bring their stress and drama into your life.

Try it.

It’s a good thing!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

“The Lesson In Disappointment”

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A week from today I was supposed to fly to California. It’s a trip I’ve been looking forward to ever since I booked my flight over a month ago. Aside from my “happy place” at the Jersey Shore where I live, Malibu is my other “happy place.” The energy there is amazing and for some reason, I feel like I’m “home” when I’m there. Two years ago I spent a week in a Malibu beach house where I finished my book, “Waking Up.” I did some of my best writing there and it was an intense soul searching time for me as well. This trip was important to me, not only because I’d be in a place I love, but because I’d be seeing my oldest son (who I haven’t seen in over a year), my Nike Nephews and would be writing and working on another book.

Over the last few days my intuition was screaming to me: “It’s not the time to go.” And that thought stuck in my head for days. My sister called me two days ago and said that she had a bad feeling about me going and that I should go another time. She also told me to remember what I always say: Everything happens for a reason. And if there’s one thing I believe in with all my heart and one I tell others is this: trust your intuition because it never lies.

So yesterday morning I had to make an adult, big girl, responsible, smart decision…and they’re not the most fun to make. I cancelled my trip. And to say I was disappointed is an understatement, yet I knew in my heart it was the right thing to do. There were too many factors popping up in the last week and I knew days ago that I would have to decide whether to go or not. I don’t like when things get complicated and this trip was beginning to get more and more complicated.

I went to the hairdresser in the morning feeling disappointed and sad and I ran errands feeling disappointed and sad. Those feelings stuck with me all day, yet once I was in the comfort of my home the tears came. The tears started late in the afternoon and continued until I fell asleep. They came in waves over dinner, and came as sobs during my bath. There was nothing I could do to stop the tears; I felt sad, disappointed and broken and I kept wondering “Why did this happen to me?”

And then the answers came through the questions in the tears: because you needed to learn something….and I did.

I remembered what it is I always tell people, and when I heard Elizabeth Gilbert say it I had confirmation that it’s true: set your priorities, make boundaries around your sacred space, and learn to say no.

And that’s true…and I know that, yet I forgot that.

My lesson was that I had lost sight of my priorities, I was allowing people to cross my boundaries, and I was saying “yes” to things I should have been saying “no” to.

So yes, I had a day of sadness and disappointment, of feeling broken, but I knew I had to go through it and get through it and I did. My soul needed to cry long and hard to let go of what I was feeling.

I sit here this morning with a headache and swollen eyes, yet knowing I learned a lesson the hard way…and an important lesson at that.

My point to you is don’t feel badly for having a down day; they happen for a reason and that reason, more often than not, teaches you something that’s for your Highest Good. Sometimes it’s those “dark” days that enable us to see the “light.” Feel what you have to, learn the lesson, and let it go.

Sometimes our biggest disappointments teach us our greatest lessons.

And I’m good with that.

Because this is life…

And it’s a part of the journey. 

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

disappointment

“A Day At The DMV”

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My driver’s license expired over the weekend and I spent two hours at the DMV yesterday renewing it. I could have renewed it by mail but I wanted to have a new picture taken for it. Sounds a bit vain, but my reason was this: my old picture was taken when I was going through breast cancer and my hair was just growing back in. The picture wasn’t horrible, but I’m a different person now and wanted to have a picture of the “me” without breast cancer on my license. May sound silly to some, but it was an important moment for me.

So while I was standing in line for hours I struck up a conversation with the woman in front of me. She was with her daughter, who had Down’s Syndrome. Margo was about 12 and one of the sweetest and smartest little girls I ever met. The three of us talked about diets, health, diabetes, my writing, where we lived (which is down the street from one another) and that Margo is going to be in the Special Olympics! It was a beautiful conversation between three strangers who were sharing their thoughts and emotions with each other.

And the one thing that stuck with me that Margo’s mom said was that she had worked her whole life and now spends her time with Margo and her friends. She said it’s the happiest time in her life because they’re all so sweet and innocent and that for the first time in her life she’s truly content.

You see, that’s the thing about sharing our lives with others, and I don’t mean telling them every personal detail of your life (although that’s okay too!). I’ve come to realize that when we take the time to talk to people we learn a bit about their story and I believe that everyone has a story, we just don’t always take the time to listen to it or even want to know it. As for me, I love people and I love listening to their story.

When we share our emotions and experiences with others we could actually be helping them through a bad day, or changing their perspective on a situation, or just letting them know they’re not alone. We all travel our own journey in this life, yet sometimes and more often than not, someone else’s journey can help us along ours. That’s what I love about being a writer: I can share my experiences with other’s and through that I get to meet some amazing people!

My day at the DMV put a smile on my face and made me realize that while we all have things to do and jobs to go to, it’s important to remember those “happy and content” moments in our lives. Sometimes it’s a stranger that helps us to remember that.

It’s time to make a difference in this world and we can all make that difference together.

Take a minute to say “hello” to a stranger today or tell them to have a good day. You may think that’s a small gesture but to the other person it may be the biggest and kindest gesture of their day.

Let’s do this together…

It’s a good thing. 

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

sharing

“Let Life Love You”

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love your life

This morning I woke up to blue skies and bright sunshine, which is a day far and few between here at the Jersey lately!

I grabbed my coffee and headed outside to take it all in. It’s in those quiet moments that I think to myself how much I love my life and how many blessings I truly have to count.

And I remembered that the more I love my life, the more it loves me back!

Love your life, my friends, and let it love you back.

It’s filled with endless possibilities, miracles and all the love you can imagine!

Try it.

It’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“The Life Of A Writer”

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life of a writer

I love being a writer. It’s crazy, it’s enlightening, it’s therapeutic; it’s living a life on fire with a passion for words; a passion for observing the world; a passion for love, life, and the people in it. It’s waking up at 3 in the morning  and coming to life with a story in your head; it’s nights of waking up during a good nights sleep with the next chapter; it’s constant thinking, wondering and figuring it all out.

It’s a 24 hour a day job, 7 days a week; the only days off are the one’s in which you don’t write, but you’re writing in your head even when you’re not writing on the computer or paper.

It’s finding a story in every conversation you have; in every person you talk to during the course of a day; and in every social event you attend.

It’s endless notebooks and journals of notes, of titles, of thoughts, of words.

It’s always “remembering something so you never forget.”

It’s always analyzing a situation to figure out the lesson or the message.

It’s always wondering “why” and “how” and “what if?”

It’s always wondering about your past that led you to your present that will take you into your future.

It’s always wondering what your dreams meant and why certain thoughts enter your mind at the oddest of moments and hours of the day.

And it’s always wondering about the title of the next story, the next book, the next blog, the next post…and so on.

It’s a mind that never turns off, slows down, takes a break, or stops thinking.

It’s a mind that’s forever listening, forever wondering, forever seeing the endless possibilities in every minute of every day, in every person you speak to, of every experience, of every lesson, of everything…everything!

It’s listening to different genres of music that pertain to your different moods; sad music for pity party days, upbeat music for when you’re feeling great!

It’s feeling all the emotions that life hands you and loving each and every one of them. You love the sad, the joy, the happy, the heartache because a writer knows that every emotion is a gift, and each gift becomes the words to a beautiful story or poem or lyric.

Writers flourish under pressure and under pain…our best writing comes from the deepest of pain. We hold onto it until we turn it into something beautiful; it’s at that moment that we can finally let it go.

It’s feeling the pain in the world and turning it into a beautiful words of hope, faith and encouragement.

It’s feeling the joy in the world and turning it into a motivational story of endless possibilities.

Writer’s feel it all; we accept it all; and we love it all because no matter the emotion, negative or positive, sad or happy, we’re able to embrace it, live it, feel it, learn from it and write about it.

And then we move on…

But not a moment before…

There are those in my life that tell me I hold onto things too long, to just “let it go,” but as a writer, I can’t. It’s not in my nature nor is it in my soul. It’s not how I’m wired or how I was born. It’s nothing I can change and I wouldn’t want to try. It’s who I am…body and soul, mind and heart.

Feeling pain is something I’ve grown accustomed to. Life happens and even pain and heartache happens to a writer. How else could we write what we do? Pleasure is born out of pain; happiness is born out of heartache; joy is born out of sorrow. So why would we not feel these emotions? It’s our feelings that give us focus, give us answers and clarity, and most importantly, it’s our feelings that give us the “words!”

Writer’s are built on words.

We are great communicators.

We are intuitive…and insightful…and pay way more attention to detail than the average person. We listen, we hear, we process, and we write.

We live everyday to its’ fullest, whether we’re sad or happy, whether you believe it or not. We don’t see feeling heartache or pain as a waste of time; and we don’t see joy and happiness as time better served. We see it all as life…our life…your life…and we value all of it as precious time.

For me, “when my heart speaks I listen, and then I write.”

And that’s the truth.

My stories begin in my heart and soul; they are cultivated through my tears and heartache; they are polished by my joy and happiness; and they are written by the words of my truth.

If the eyes are the window to the soul, my writing is the window into “me.”

If you’re not a writer you’ll never understand, and why would you?

We writer’s are dreamers, and most of the “real” world thinks we’re crazy; obsessed; and a little weird. They think we’re constantly pursuing a dream we’ll never catch yet we believe differently. We believe in our dreams and in ourselves; we are born out of this obsession to achieve the dreams, no matter the cost; and yes, maybe we’re a bit weird because we know that what we dream, what we write and what we feel is reality: it’s the reality of a writer.

I love the life of being a writer; it’s crazy, it’s exhausting, it’s painful, and it’s simply amazing.

I am Anne Dennish…

I’m a writer, a dreamer and a poet…

I’m aware of my surroundings and all the people in it…

I’m a talker and a listener…

I’m your friend, your family and your lover…

I’m your mom and your mentor…

I’m all these things because…

I’m a writer.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

I am a writer!
Anne Dennish- Author
Anne Dennish – Author

Photos by Tim McGeough – EVNFlo Photography

“Making A Living Or Making A Life”

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Let’s face it, we need money to survive: to pay the bills, the rent or the mortgage, put food on the table and to keep clothes on our backs. We need money to do this and most of us will do what it takes to do that for our families. We work full-time or part-time, and take the overtime that’s offered to us. We work and we work to do all those things…those “responsible” things.

On the other hand, how much do we need? Do we need all those things that we work so hard to get? Or is there a balance between what we have to do to make a living to afford those things or do we do what we have to do to make a life to appreciate and spend time with the people we’re busy making a living for?

There’s a quote that reads like this: “Don’t get so busy making a living that you forget to have a life.”

And that’s an important thought to think about.

I know it’s important to be able to make a living, but more often than not, I see people so busy and exhausted making that living that there’s nothing left of them to enjoy the life it affords…or the people that they love who support them to make that living.

Do we work until exhaustion because of our ego and self-esteem? Do you feel like “more of a man” when you work more than 40 hours a week? Does it make you feel like more of an “empowered woman” when you work all week and on weekends? Is all that work outside of what is really necessary about our self-esteem?

We seem to live in a society that is built upon making money and “having it all,” yet I’ve seen a shift in society as well. Everyone is working more than normal but looking for answers as to what their life is missing; they feel a void, fatigue, and moments of “is this is as good as it gets.?”

But think about it: you put that pressure on yourself. No one is asking you to spend 50 or 60 hours a week working your ass off to pay for the unnecessary things in life; you put that pressure on yourself. No one is asking you to work until the point of exhaustion that you can’t enjoy your life filled with family or friends; you made that choice. No one is asking you to get so busy making a living that you don’t have the time or energy to have a life; you made that decision.

Life doesn’t go on forever; neither does a job or career. In fact, the job and career most often times will end long before the life.

And life is short, life is precarious, and life is unsure.

We’re not promised another day; we’re not promised a job.

We’re not promised time; we’re not promised job security.

We’re not promised that our loved ones will always be there; we’re not promised that the job will either.

The people who love us want to spend time with us; the job wants us to spend time working.

The people who care about us want us to be well and happy and enjoy life; the job wants us to be well and happy so that we can do their work.

The people we are making a life with want that life to be filled with memories; the job wants that life to be filled with hours that don’t make a memory, but fill a quota.

The people you love are the life; the job is just a living.

The people who love you don’t lay you off or replace you for someone better; the job does.

The people who love you want to spend time with you; the job wants you to spend time working overtime.

The people who love you don’t need anything from you, they simply want “you”; the job doesn’t want you, they need what they can get from you.

And the people who love you, RESPECT you, and care about your well-being will understand when you say “no” to them because you’re exhausted or need to simply “be;” the job doesn’t take “no” for an answer because they don’t respect you or care about your well-being, they care about you doing what they want.

Life is so short, so unpredictable, and so precarious; days aren’t promised and neither is the job. So while you need to make a living to pay the bills, don’t forget to make a “life.” And make that life with the people that appreciate you, love you, and are part of that “life” you are living.

In the end, the job won’t be there to take care of you if you’re hurt; the job won’t understand when you’re too exhausted to work overtime; the job won’t care if something happens to you because they’ll find someone else to replace you.

The ones who love you will always care because they know that you can’t be replaced.

And “making a life” is all about surrounding yourself with the people who love you; it’s about enjoying every day and every moment; it’s about making memories and of hearts taking pictures.

Don’t get so busy making a living that you forget to have a life.

Learn to say “no” when you need to…

It’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

 

“Always Stay Humble and Kind”

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I wanted to share this song by Tim McGraw with you. It’s called “Humble and Kind” and truly has an inspiring message for everyone. Please take a moment to listen to it and read through the lyrics below. There’s a strong message of how the world can change and lives can be happier if we simply remember our roots and live by being”humble and kind.” I hope you enjoy it!

“Humble and Kind”

“You know there’s a light that glows by the front door
Don’t forget the keys under the mat
When childhood stars shine, always stay humble and kind
Go to church cause your momma says to
Visit grandpa every chance that you can
It won’t be wasted time
Always stay humble and kind

Hold the door, say please, say thank you
Don’t steal, don’t cheat, and don’t lie
I know you got mountains to climb but
Always stay humble and kind
When the dreams you’re dreamin’ come to you
When the work you put in is realized
Let yourself feel the pride but
Always stay humble and kind

Don’t expect a free ride from no one
Don’t hold a grudge or a chip and here’s why
Bitterness keeps you from flying
Always stay humble and kind
Know the difference with sleeping with someone
And sleeping with someone you love
I love you ain’t no pick up line so
Always stay humble and kind

Hold the door say please say thank you
Don’t steal, don’t cheat, and don’t lie
I know you got mountains to climb but
Always stay humble and kind
When the dreams you’re dreamin’ come to you
When the work you put in is realized
Let yourself feel the pride but
Always stay humble and kind

When it’s hot, eat a root beer popsicle
Shut off the ac and roll the windows down
Let that summer sun shine
Always stay humble and kind
Don’t take for granted the love this life gives you
When you get where you’re goin’
Don’t forget turn back around
And help the next one in line
Always stay humble and kind.”

~Tim McGraw~

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

“The Godfather”

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I lost someone very special to me a few years ago today. He was an amazing man and while I wasn’t in his life for very long, he made an impact on mine to last a lifetime. Tom Contreras was “the godfather” to me and always wanted me to write about him…and I not only wrote about him, I published his story in my last book. This is my story about “The Godfather!”

It’s not very often in this lifetime that you meet someone who makes an impact on your life, yet I met such a man who left this world too soon on a Saturday night late in December after a night spent with family and friends.  He’s my love’s cousin, Tommy Contreras, and he became one of my closest friends ever since I was introduced to him. I touched base with him by phone daily, and my love and I would “conference” call him together a few nights a week, and believe me, those calls were nothing short of belly laughs, off color jokes, and love!

I didn’t know him as long as his family, yet with Tommy you felt like you knew him a lifetime. He had a way of making you feel like you were his family and I am forever grateful to him for making me feel that way. I used to call him “the Godfather” because I could call him for advice, or even better, his opinion! He loved that title, especially belonging to a big Italian family!

He had a smile that lit up the room, and a laugh that made you laugh right along. He had an amazing singing voice and an incredible sense of humor with just the right amount of sarcasm. He had the ability to make fun of himself just to make you laugh, and he was famous for opening up a conversation with “you won’t believe what happened to me!” And then he’d proceed to tell you about the craziest things that I truly believe could only happen to him!

He was a “gentle giant” with a heart as big as the ocean and enough love to go around the world.

Tommy left too soon, yet it was an honor, privilege and a blessing to have known him, and to have been with him, surrounding him with love, as he closed his eyes and left this world.

He was my “words with friends” partner and I was finally winning! He was the “go to” guy when I needed advice about his cousin and he was my friend. I’ve been missing him, but as his family and friends all gathered together at one of his favorite restaurants in Point Pleasant, Frankie’s, two days after he passed, his presence was felt. I felt the emptiness of him not being with us, as did his family, yet the night belonged to him, filled with stories told through laughter and tears. And truth be told, his body may not have been there but his spirit and soul was. It still is.

He left a legacy to his family and to anyone lucky enough to know him and not everyone is able to do that. I don’t think he ever realized the important place he had in the lives of those who knew him; I don’t think he truly knew how much he was loved; I don’t think he understood just how much he meant to the people he met.

But I know that where he is now, he does know. And he’s smiling, he’s not in pain, he’s happy and he’s watching over all of us…even me.

I hope he knows now how much he’s missed, but more importantly, that he’s remembered with love and laughter, stories and memories. I’m absolutely sure that the immense amount of love we all have for him followed him straight up to Heaven!

I miss this man and think of him often, yet I know he’s around. I feel his presence during a family party and hear his laughter when someone tells a good old-fashioned, off color, funny joke!

He always got on my case about being in one of my books, always saying to me “I’m in the next book, right?” I always answered the same way: “yes, you will be, just waiting for the spirit to move me to writing it!”

And his spirit moved me.

I will forever be grateful to this man for allowing me the blessing of being part of his life; it was both an honor and a privilege, and I’m grateful to be part of some of those great family stories and memories now….

There are moments now that I want to call him and say “Hey, you won’t believe what happened to me!”

But I can’t.

What I can do is close my eyes, think about him and hear his voice.

Yet every so often, my heart feels a bit selfish and I can’t help but think that he should be here; he should be here to be a part of our lives, of our dreams, of our laughter and tears; he should be here with hugs at family parties and to celebrate our successes. He should be here…

But then again, I have to remind myself that he is here and always will be…in all of our hearts and all of our minds.

This one’s for you, Tom Contreras

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

tommy-memorial

Tom Contreras – The Godfather