letting go

“A Broken Heart”

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“A broken heart is proof that it still works.” ~Anne Dennish~

Ah, the broken heart…we’ve all had one at one time or another in our life, and it’s never easy to get through.

But you can get through…if you choose to.

Life is what happens when we’re not paying attention, and what that means is that we’ve recite-1rs96tblost sight of the blessings in our life, and in some way, taken them for granted, always believing that if they’re there in the first place, they’ll never be taken away. And that’s how a broken heart happens: we weren’t paying attention.

Broken hearts are our greatest teachers, yet there’s a few things you have to understand to realize that.

Let’s be honest, broken hearts happen because of “love.” They happen when something suddenly rocks our world, and what we believed to be true suddenly looks very different….but maybe it isn’t different. Maybe it’s the same as it always was; we just didn’t take the time to see it.

We’re all human and we all make mistakes, but if you want to start to heal a broken heart you must throw away the “list of wrongs” and write the “list of rights.” Sure, when you’re heart is broken you feel betrayed, angry, hurt, even confrontational; all valid feelings yet negative emotions only bring negative reactions. So, when the the dust settles from these emotions, and you can put them aside, the real healing begins.

“Forgiving” is the hardest thing in the world to do; “loving” is the easiest. Yet, by forgiving, we release our anger and negativity; it doesn’t excuse someone’s behavior, but it allows us to move forward with clear eyes and an open heart.

My worst broken heart was my greatest teacher; I could sit here and go on and on that he treated me badly, hurt my feelings, disrespected me, and so on and so forth. And I used to wonder why someone could treat me badly, or break my heart; I didn’t feel like I deserved it. But here’s the truth:

I didn’t deserve it; I allowed it.

Hearts are broken from miscommunication, biting our tongue and not standing in our truth. I learned that the hard way; I should have used my voice, stood in my truth, and set clear boundaries of what I would allow and what I wouldn’t.

I know to do that now.

Time-to-change-myBroken hearts happen for many reasons, yet when you can put the hurt and blame aside, that’s when the reality comes in and the healing can start. When you take your own accountability in the brokenness, you heal, you become stronger, and you learn something about yourself…and with that, you’re given the gift of changing yourself.

I can promise you that your broken heart will mend; and it will mend stronger…but you have to do the work and LET IT!

“Broken hearts are the reality of what we lost sight of.” ~Anne Dennish~

Life as we know it can change with a broken heart, but why not let it change for the better? Look at the positive in a hurtful situation; something wasn’t working, the Universe whacked you with a 2×4 to wake you up, and now you’ve been given a chance to learn and change.

I believe that there’s always something good to be found in the storm; it will take time to see, but it’s there. The choice to see it is up to you. And sometimes, just sometimes, maybe it’s the “storm before the calm.”

Life’s an adventure with ups and downs; how you handle it and move forward is your gift of choice…choose wisely!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“Just Believe”

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It’s been quite a week for my love and I! So many amazing things happening, and as I sit here this morning thinking about it, I’m filled with gratitude at what the Universe has brought into my life… into all our lives! I love those “waking up” moments!
 
And I wondered: “How did I get here?”
 
Then I remembered: “I believed, kept the faith, and let go of trying to control things.” And then amazing things began happening!
 
My life has been one grand adventure after another, whether it be meeting new people, or finding myself being gifted with opportunities I would never have imagined. I believe that everything happens for a reason: “it happens when it should, how it should, and as it should,” and that belief hasn’t let me down yet!
 
Stress, worry and fear are the biggest obstacles in our life, and only you can change that. Once those words are out of your vocabulary, you will be amazed at what the Universe will bring to you! Those words keep the door shut to good things coming into your life, and who wants that?
 
Open the door to the life you deserve with words such as “belief, faith, and love” and you will soon be sitting in gratitude at what comes through it!
Wishing you love and light,
~Anne Dennish~
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“Life Is Always Changing…”

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“Life is always changing, time to turn the page,
The story continues, it’s mine to create.
So what do I do now? Where do I go?
Do I let my mind lead me backwards in time
Or move ahead slow?”

lyrics from “What Now” by Anne Dennish & Sutton Thomas

It’s true, life is always changing, and while change can sometimes be difficult, it’s certainly proof that we’re still breathing! Life is an adventure, and lessons for our Highest Good are everywhere, just waiting for us to see them and learn from them.

We’re always having “waking up” moments; that moment when you suddenly become aware of something you never saw before; never realized before; or never knew before.

Yet again, maybe those “somethings” were there all along; it was YOU that changed! You cleared your mind; you listened to your intuition; or perhaps you learned something new about yourself that allowed you the clear sight to see something in a different light.

It’s called “change.” And while life is always changing, so are we. We’re changing for our Highest Good; changing to live the life we always wanted and so deserve; changing to pursue our dreams.

So why are some so scared of change? It’s because we don’t always know where the change will take us…so we will “let our mind lead us backwards in time.” Yet when you embrace the change of the lessons you learned, it’s time to “move ahead slow.”

During our time here on earth, we move into many different lives. We grow, we mature, and we learn as we go, so why go back in time? Go, if only to remember for a moment while you left it in the first place, but jump back quickly into the present; it’s the present that will help build your future.

Let life change you; embrace the lessons your are gifted; release the past with love and light, because what once served you has done its’ time, and something “new” is waiting for you…it always is.

Wishing you love and light and a grand adventure,

~Anne Dennish~

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“The Truth Seeker”

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“Reasons and Excuses”

There’s a distinct difference between the two, or so I believe.

“Excuses” are what we use when we don’t stand in our own truth. Rather than tell someone how we feel, and why we feel a particular way, we’re “sugar-coating” our truth, and in my opinion, I’d much rather stand in my truth.

Lies and truths may hurt, yet in the end, there’s a respect with the truth, and none with a lie. It’s not always easy to tell someone how you’re feeling, and it’s those times we trip over our words, tell them “our truth” in a roundabout way, or simply withhold it. And you know what I’ve learned? That way of thinking is not for your Highest Good, and will, in time, eat you alive and make you angry at yourself for not saying what you needed to say.dr seuss

“Reasons” are the truth of our feelings, of who we are, what we want, what we need, and what we don’t. They are our way of loving and respecting ourselves enough to know what is in our best interest and what’s not. No one can fault you with your truth, and if they do, you’ve learned a lesson and seen their true colors.

“Excuses” don’t give someone the full picture; “reasons” do. Lies don’t allow someone to make a decision for their Highest Good; truth does. “Insecurity” is born from lies; “trust” is born from truth.

And I would much rather be hurt with the truth than deceived by a lie; some lies will truly alter important decisions you need to make in your life. Yes, the truth can hurt, yet in the end, the truth does set you free; free to be who you are; free to stand in your own truth!

I want to surround myself with those who stand strong in their own truth, not those that hide behind “excuses” and a version of their truth. The”truth seekers” are the ones who are loyal, who have your back, who don’t judge YOUR truth, but embrace it!

Be a “truth seeker” and surround yourself with other “truth seekers;” it’s a circle of trust you build around yourself, and those you love. Don’t fear your truth or anyone else’s truth; embrace it!

Stop making “excuses;” stand in your own truth, and let your strength of “reason” shine through! Those that matter to you won’t mind a bit!

And that I can promise you!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“Help… I Need Somebody!”

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In the midst of barbeques and time spent with friends this past weekend, my love and I were able to find some down time to watch movies from the comfort of our serenity cave. One movie in particular stuck with me: “28 Days” with Sandra Bullock, who plays a writer that had to go to rehab. The theme of the story wasn’t what intrigued me; it was the messages throughout the movie. One in particular stood out to me. Her character, Gwen, had broken the rules, to which her therapist made her wear a sign around her neck that said: “Confront me if I don’t ask for help.” As usual, it got me to thinking and wondering:

How often do WE ask others for help?28days

Most of us, including myself, will answer: not very often. The answer should be: not enough! I realized as I watched this movie that rehab isn’t just for addictions; it’s for changing a life that wasn’t working and learning how to speak your own truth, and be comfortable with it. And isn’t that how life should be for all of us?

I’m willing to help anyone and everyone, as are most of the people in my circle. I feel good helping someone else, no matter what help is needed. Yet when we need help with something, we don’t ask. We don’t want to burden another, or worse yet, we don’t want to believe we need the help. In society today we seem to be so programmed to believe that “we can do it all with no help from anyone!” It’s as if we’re trained to believe that this is what makes us strong and self-sufficient. That’s all well and good, yet when we don’t ask for help we become tired, run-down, emotionally spent, and worse yet, we get sick.

The flip side of this is that while we feel like a wonderful human being by helping someone else who asks for help, we don’t ask them and don’t allow them the rights to the same good feelings we get by helping out. It’s kind of ironic, isn’t it? Then again, maybe it’s selfish on our part. Why do we want to feel good yet not allow someone else the same right? A little “food for thought” here!

I’m guilty of this and it’s something I’m working on changing. I’ve spent a lifetime doing everything myself, rarely asking for help when I knew deep down inside I needed it. I didn’t like appearing weak, or needy. When someone asked me for a favor, I jumped at the chance, whether I had the time or not.It didn’t matter that I was exhausted, or had to change my schedule to help them, I just did it. I’m not saying that’s wrong, but I am saying that it’s okay to say “no” sometimes. We need to take care of ourselves first in order to truly help someone else.

Every day I work on saying “no” if  it’s not for my Highest Good, and am trying hard to ask for help when I need it. I’m willing to allow someone else the chance to feel needed, to help a friend out and know that they made a difference in my day and in my life. My mantra for my book, “Waking Up” is: “It’s time to make a difference, and we can make a difference together.” Well, that is yet another “waking up” moment in my life: to admit that I’m not weak if I need help, that in fact, asking for help shows a sign of strength; that my “making a difference” in life and the world also includes allowing other’s to be part of that journey with me; and more importantly, that I’m a work in progress, learning more about myself every day on this journey of life, and that’s okay.

The Universe throws so many “signs” at us, and we’ll see them if we just pay attention. Watching an old movie brought to light many signs I had been missing, and asking for help was just one of them. Owning “our truth” isn’t always easy, especially if it involves a quality in ourselves that we don’t care for, yet when you own your “truth,” you own your right to change it. It’s your lesson to learn, and your choice on how to handle it.

Today I work on asking for help if I need it, whether it’s simply a much needed phone call with a friend, or a strong arm to hold me at the end of the day. Today I incorporate the “Serenity Prayer” in my lifeand know that I been gifted ” the courage to change the things I can,” and asking for help, finding my balance in this crazy world, and loving myself are all things I can change for my Highest Good.serenity

“Confront me if I don’t ask for help.”

Remember that as you go throughout your day and each day to come; let someone else feel the peace and joy you feel by helping them, because in the end:

“It’s time to make a difference, and we can make a difference together.”

And today I’m remembering that!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“Take A Time-Out From Adulthood”

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“Adulthood hurts.”

That was the topic of discussion over coffee this morning that my love and I shared a laugh over. We can both agree that sometimes being an “adult” is just too serious!

As adults we often forget what it’s like to be a child; we look at children with envy at how simple their lives are when they’re younger. And we begin to look at adulthood as boring.

But you know what? Adulthood is only boring and too serious if you let it be that way. No one says that adults can’t find their “inner child” and express it! In fact, I believe with all my heart that it’s healthy and absolutely necessary to be in touch with your “inner child,” to find the time to be free and be silly; to find some time to play, to make the time to have fun!

All too often we get caught up in the day, forgetting to take the time to “stop and smell the roses.” And we miss a lot of good stuff when we don’t take the time to see it or feel it. We miss out because we’re being “too serious” of an adult and not allowing our beautiful “inner child” to come out and play often enough.

Part of living a life in balance is allowing yourself to play and release that kid locked up inside of you! It’s healthy for your mind, body and spirit. Look how good you feel when you’ve had a good belly laugh, or played Frisbee with your kid, or swung a hula hoop around your waist! “Adult” coloring books are all the rage now…and why? Because you relive a memory of coloring as a child and find it fun and relaxing as an adult.

So, today, I’m asking you all to take a “time-out” from adulthood at least once a day. Trust me, your “inner child” is just waiting to come out and play!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“It’s A Guy/Girl Thing”

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As my love and I were having our morning coffee together, we began to discuss our “miscommunication” from the night before. It’s funny how two people can be in the same situation, yet both can see it so differently. I guess that’s the difference between men and women: men see it one way, and women see it another.

That’s not to say it happens all the time, because I truly believe that when you’re in balance and in the right relationship, it happens very little. Yet I do believe that when it happens it does so to teach us something about ourselves and each other.

It also teaches us about our relationship.

I tossed and turned all night, thinking about what had transpired. It was such a small and inconsequential thing, yet couple that with being tired, working long hours and too much on your mind, well, you’ve got a recipe for disaster… or at least a minor miscommunication.

Women and men think differently, process things differently and react differently. Yet what I’ve learned over the years is this: If women can learn to accept the differences of a man, and a man can learn compassion for a woman’s differences, then all is right with the relationship. Truth be told, we should all have respect for each others’ differences, whether you’re a man or a woman.

How many times have you said: “It’s a guy thing, or it’s a girl thing?” I’m sure you’ve found yourself thinking it or saying it on several occasions. And you would be right because men and women are different, and that’s a fact.

So what do you do with these differences? You embrace them with love, try and understand them if you can, and be grateful for the lessons you learn from them. It’s these very lessons that teach you more about yourself, and about your relationship.

My love and I don’t always agree on everything, yet the love we share and the life we’re building together are much stronger than the little things that come up every so often. Our similarities far outweigh our differences and once we talk about our differences, there’s always laughter to follow… and our love for one another grows stronger.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“The Voice of the Ocean”

/ Anne Dennish / 2 Comments
In my book, “Waking Up,” I wrote a story called “The Voice of the Ocean.” And I can remember how it came to fruition…
 
I was sitting in a dear friends house in Malibu, right on the beach. It was the most beautiful, peaceful, serene space I could have possibly in. She let me stay at her house so that I could finish the book, yet that week there proved to be so much more to me. It was actually another “waking up” moment, because, while I did finish the book, it turned into a major soul searching time there.
 
It’s funny how much time you have to think when you’re alone, and even though I was writing throughout the days and nights, I was alone with my thoughts… and the sounds of the ocean. And the sounds of the ocean turned into the “voice of the ocean,” filled with messages and waking up moments.
 
The greatest thing I learned out there was this:
 
“That I loved more than I allowed myself to be loved; that because I’ve not given someone else a chance to prove that they can love me as well as I can love them, I couldn’t feel it. I feel it now.”
 
Wow, what a moment that was… to realize that I was still carrying a fear of having my heart broken and my soul hurt. I realized in that one moment that while I can love well, I never allowed someone else the chance to love me the same. Everything changed in that awakening moment. All the walls around my heart that I thought were gone, suddenly crumbled. And life has been amazing ever since.
I’ll be forever grateful for that time in Malibu, because it changed my life, and I love when my life changes for the better. We are all works in progress and constantly learning more about ourselves every day… that is, if we allow it.
 
Listen to your intuition, follow your heart, and get that “fear” out of your world. I’m telling you this: life and love is a leap of faith, in yourself and others. Take the leap and land in love!
Wishing you love and light,
~Anne Dennish~
my malibu

Another “waking up” moment for me in Malibu!

“The Bully Free Zone?”

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“Bullies:” they’re not just for kids anymore!

Every time I walk into my sons’ school, I see the large banner hanging across the hallway that says: “Bully Free Zone.” And I have to wonder…is anyplace really a bully free zone?

I know there’s bullies everywhere, and it doesn’t pertain simply to children. Adults can be the most ruthless bullies in the world, except we choose to call them by other names (and I’ll leave those words up to you!) Yet the bottom line is this: adult bullies are mean, they’re spiteful, and they do as much damage emotionally to another adult as a child bully does to another child.

Yet I’ve learned one thing about these types of people: they act that way because of their own insecurities and fears; they can’t find their own power and control, so they subject others to it. No, it’s not fair, it’s hurtful, and yes, sometimes even painful. But I’ve noticed throughout the years of one thing that will stop them in their tracks: your strength.

“My strength is their weakness; my weakness their strength.”

That’s right, the moment you become weak and allow them the control to treat you badly is the very moment they become strong. Watch the difference in their behavior towards you when you stand up for yourself and are strong.

Experience has taught me that this is true; walk away from the “bullies” in the world; send them love and light, keep them in your prayers, and walk away. They have their own lessons to learn about themselves, and until they’re willing to do that, their life will never be anything that they want it to be. They’re losing out on love and happiness, and all good things.

Listen, you don’t have to allow someone to treat you badly; you choose who you are surrounded by. Keep a healthy, positive, and loving “vibe in your tribe.”

Here’s a little food for thought: maybe your “strength may be their weakness,” yet it may also be the message for them that no one else has ever said to them. In fact, you showing them what love and respect for oneself and for others’ looks like may be a perfect way to make a difference in their life.

It’s time to make a difference, and we can make a difference together.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“Waking Up Moments”

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I had a conversation with my love yesterday about what a “waking up” moment is… and I realized that some might not know what it truly means. So, let me explain…

A “waking up” moment is that moment of clarity that can bring you to your knees when you realize you’re not living the life you deserve or want. Yes, it does take but one moment to find yourself “waking up,” yet we are meant to have many of those moments throughout our lifetime. It depends on your age at the time, your relationships, even your job.

It’s that moment you suddenly ask yourself: “What the hell am I doing? Why am I doing this to myself? How do I change this?” There you go, you’ve “woken up” to the reality of your life and your truth. And in that moment you were just gifted the choice to change it all!

I’ve had many “waking up” moments, yet breast cancer was the most powerful. It changed my life in ways I hadn’t thought possible, yet all for the best. I’m living proof of what a “waking up” moment can do for you… it can bring a miracle!

A “waking up” moment stops you in your tracks, makes you think, and hands you the lessons you need to find your truth and the joy you so deserve.

What was a “waking up” moment for you? I’d love to hear what helped you along the way, and I’m sure other’s would love to know as well. Share your story with me today, because “it’s time to make a difference, and we can make a difference together!”

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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