courage

“A Broken Heart”

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“A broken heart is proof that it still works.” ~Anne Dennish~

Ah, the broken heart…we’ve all had one at one time or another in our life, and it’s never easy to get through.

But you can get through…if you choose to.

Life is what happens when we’re not paying attention, and what that means is that we’ve recite-1rs96tblost sight of the blessings in our life, and in some way, taken them for granted, always believing that if they’re there in the first place, they’ll never be taken away. And that’s how a broken heart happens: we weren’t paying attention.

Broken hearts are our greatest teachers, yet there’s a few things you have to understand to realize that.

Let’s be honest, broken hearts happen because of “love.” They happen when something suddenly rocks our world, and what we believed to be true suddenly looks very different….but maybe it isn’t different. Maybe it’s the same as it always was; we just didn’t take the time to see it.

We’re all human and we all make mistakes, but if you want to start to heal a broken heart you must throw away the “list of wrongs” and write the “list of rights.” Sure, when you’re heart is broken you feel betrayed, angry, hurt, even confrontational; all valid feelings yet negative emotions only bring negative reactions. So, when the the dust settles from these emotions, and you can put them aside, the real healing begins.

“Forgiving” is the hardest thing in the world to do; “loving” is the easiest. Yet, by forgiving, we release our anger and negativity; it doesn’t excuse someone’s behavior, but it allows us to move forward with clear eyes and an open heart.

My worst broken heart was my greatest teacher; I could sit here and go on and on that he treated me badly, hurt my feelings, disrespected me, and so on and so forth. And I used to wonder why someone could treat me badly, or break my heart; I didn’t feel like I deserved it. But here’s the truth:

I didn’t deserve it; I allowed it.

Hearts are broken from miscommunication, biting our tongue and not standing in our truth. I learned that the hard way; I should have used my voice, stood in my truth, and set clear boundaries of what I would allow and what I wouldn’t.

I know to do that now.

Time-to-change-myBroken hearts happen for many reasons, yet when you can put the hurt and blame aside, that’s when the reality comes in and the healing can start. When you take your own accountability in the brokenness, you heal, you become stronger, and you learn something about yourself…and with that, you’re given the gift of changing yourself.

I can promise you that your broken heart will mend; and it will mend stronger…but you have to do the work and LET IT!

“Broken hearts are the reality of what we lost sight of.” ~Anne Dennish~

Life as we know it can change with a broken heart, but why not let it change for the better? Look at the positive in a hurtful situation; something wasn’t working, the Universe whacked you with a 2×4 to wake you up, and now you’ve been given a chance to learn and change.

I believe that there’s always something good to be found in the storm; it will take time to see, but it’s there. The choice to see it is up to you. And sometimes, just sometimes, maybe it’s the “storm before the calm.”

Life’s an adventure with ups and downs; how you handle it and move forward is your gift of choice…choose wisely!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“What’s Your Agenda?”

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Good morning! What a weekend it was! My mind is still trying to process a dream coming true at Barnes and Noble this past Saturday… yet, there’s no rest for the weary and it’s time to keep moving forward. With that said… I have a question for all of you:

Do you have an agenda in life?

I’ve had this discussion with several people this week, so I’m assuming that the Universe is asking me to write about it! So, here goes:

Throughout the years I’ve heard men say that women all have an “agenda,” and I believe women feel the same about men. In fact, someone made that statement to me years ago, and as he lumped me in with all women in the world, I thought about it. Within seconds I answered him: “Yes, you’re right. All women do have an agenda, and mine is to be happy.” That stopped him right in his tracks, yet it didn’t stop me.

I’m curious about people and their stories, and about their “agenda” in life. I’ve come to realize that a positive agenda which is based solely on your purpose in life and your Highest Good is the agenda to have; this agenda involves you and you alone. Other’s will help it along, but the agenda you have is up to you.

Then there is the other type of agenda: the one that is self-serving and involves a manipulative or controlling behavior that involves someone else. I find that the people with this type of agenda are not living the life they want; they’re not as happy as they’d like to be, and they tend to want what others have. They tend to be martyrs; people that know they have a choice to change their life and their thinking, yet are too fearful to do so. They tend to control other’s lives because they can’t control their own.

And they’re not all bad people; they’re sad people who sometimes get so lost in their own tearsdespair that they have an agenda with those that are NOT lost, those that ARE happy, and those that ARE in control. Most times they don’t even realize what they’re doing, and that’s where we need to pay attention to our Highest Good to know what they’re doing and not allow it. It’s never selfish to do what’s best for you!

We can’t fix another human being; we can only fix ourselves. We can love them and stand by them, yet if they are unable to change, it’s okay to wish them love and light and walk away. Keep them in your thoughts, remember them in your prayers, but if their “agenda” is hurting you, then it’s time to love yourself more… and that is an “agenda” worth having: “to be happy.”

One more time: what is your agenda in life?

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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“Scenes From An Italian Deli”

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“It’s time to make a difference, and we can make a difference together.”

~Anne Dennish~

I had a book signing today at my local Italian deli, Valente’s. It was a cold, rainy day, yet the owner and staff were wonderful to my love and I.

However, it wasn’t the amount of books sold that stuck with me today…it’s what happened as I was leaving, and I want to share this beautiful story with all of you.

There was a table of gentleman sitting across from me, and they were there for quite some time. They kept looking over and were probably wondering what this book was all about, yet they didn’t stop by to see me… until I was leaving.

This sweet gentleman came up to me and asked what the book was about. I told him it was about the lessons I’ve learned through my life and breast cancer. He smiled and told me he has a rare cancer, but was fortunate to be in an experimental trial which is keeping him alive. Others with this same cancer had passed long before him. Soon, his friend joined in the conversation, and we exchanged our stories of chemo, treatments, hospitals, side effects and survival!

I reached my hand out to formally introduce myself to him, and with that, he outstretched his arms and consumed me in a beautiful bear hug. He told me to keep writing, stay healthy, and survive. I told him the same. I couldn’t help but feel such a connection with another person battling cancer. He smiled as he said goodbye, and wished me well.

That stands out more in my mind than the books I signed today. My story made a difference, and his story made a difference to me.

Please remember to be kind, to take a moment to listen to someone who needs to talk, and share your “waking up” moments with others.

After all: “It’s time to make a difference, and we can make a difference together.”

And today, at an Italian deli, a difference was made.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

Author of “Waking Up: Lessons Learned Through My Adventures With Life and Breast Cancer”

Available at Barnes and Noble.com and Amazon.com

your move

“When Cancer Wakes You Up”

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My new book, “Waking Up: Lessons Learned From My Adventures With Life and Breast Cancer” was born over two years ago while lying on a radiation table for breast cancer.

I’m the type of person that loves meeting people, because every single one of us has a story…we ARE a story! Some may not believe that, yet as a writer, I know it’s true. I was out to dinner with my love last night, along with his cousin and his love, and a table full of people I had never met. Yet by the end of the night, I knew them well.

You see, that’s the beauty of paying attention to people and speaking to them, yet more importantly, LISTENING to them. They were laughing at me last night when I said that the whole night of conversations was indeed a story!

So it’s no surprise that “Waking Up” was born; the idea may have begun on a radiation table, yet the stories were already taking shape in my mind, and for the last two years of writing it, more stories were born. Every story is true; most of them are of my personal experience, and there’s a few born out of situations with someone else that  I was involved with, who graciously allowed me to write about it.

Yet, here’s what that one moment that woke me up was: “breast cancer!”

Yes, I had been on a spiritual journey for years, but finding out I had cancer was a big kick in the ass! I realized that as much as I had learned over the years, the lessons were far from over. Breast cancer changed my life and how I live it. That tumor was all the things I never said out loud, all the pain of allowing people to treat me badly. It was everything I never said that I should have, so I made a deal with the cancer: I’ll open my mouth and use my voice, I’ll make better choices of who I surround myself with, I’ll rid myself of people and situations that me feel less than good, and I’ll take all of this and write about it to help someone else as long as you leave my body when the time is right.

I guess the cancer agreed with the deal, because it held up its’ end of the bargain…I did all those things and it left me the day they cut all that stuff out of my body. They did more than a lumpectomy on February 21st…as cancer and I were about to say good-bye that day, I could hear it speaking to me. Sounds crazy, but it wasn’t really. It said: “You’ve done the work and I know it wasn’t easy. I’m sorry to have had to come and visit you, but this journey is over. Remember the lessons, remember to love yourself, and finish up our deal: tell your lessons to everyone you can reach. I’m counting on you.”

Well, in a strange way, chemo may have healed my cancer, but my cancer healed me. It taught me more than I could imagined, and since then, I spread the word, I keep out as much drama and stress as I can, and I walk away from anyone or anything that tries to control and manipulate me. Cancer didn’t abuse me as much as some people have tried to, and I’m smarter because of all of it.

“Waking Up” is so much more than a book; it’s my heart and soul that simply wants to make a difference in someone’s life. Life get’s shorter as we get older, and my goal is to live everyday to the fullest, to show love and kindness to someone who needs it, and most importantly, to make someone laugh and smile.

Struggles will always happen in our lives, yet it’s your attitude and perspective that will handle it and teach you more than you could have ever imagined. Love your lessons, whether you like them or not, because in the end, miracles happen!

“Just believe, just have faith, and all good things will fall into place.”

Enjoy the journey and allow yourself to “wake up,”

~Anne Dennish~

choice and chance

Author of “Waking Up: Lessons Learned Through My Adventures With Life and Breast Cancer”

copyright 2016

Available at Amazon.com, Barnes and Noble.com, and Xlibris.com

 

 

“The Dreamers vs. The Realists”

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“My opinion is that the “realists” are fearful of the “dreamers,” because we dare to believe that there’s more to life than living in reality; that in fact, sometimes our dreams are the very thing we need in order to live in our reality.”

It took many years for me to accept and be comfortable with being called a “dreamer.” People had me believing that dreamers had no sense of reality, and that being one was not a good thing. I’ve learned throughout my adventures in my life that being a dreamer is a wonderful gift…and while I am a dreamer, I’m a realist as well.

“A dreamer is a realist with faith.”

Those that look down upon a dreamer are simply fearful of who we are; they see in us what they can’t see in themselves. They look at us and wonder what our “secret” is to dreaming as we do. The secret is simple: have faith in yourself!

If you want to make a difference in the world, you have to begin with a dream, then turn that dream into a reality. And all that happens with “faith!”

Here’s to the dreamers of the world! It’s time to make a difference…and we can make a difference together!

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

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from “Waking Up”  copyright 2016