“Where’s The Love?”

wheresthelove

If you’ve been following my latest blogs then you’ll understand this story. Last weekend someone made a comment on one of my blogs. It was hurtful and untrue. As I looked at the IP address I realized that it belonged to the same person that did the same thing to me in August, commenting on me personally rather than on my writing.

My heart sank on Saturday morning when I saw a degrading comment about “me.” I traced the IP address to the vicinity of where it came from and realized that it was from the same one back in August, and sadly, it’s someone I know.

I appreciate and welcome any comments about my writing…I appreciate comments to tell me how I can be a better writer. I don’t take offense at construction criticism about my writing, but I do take offense to being publicly slandered about “who” someone says I am. And I’m hurt to know it’s someone I know and that “someone” knows I’m not anything that they said I was. My character was defamed, my reputation slandered. And I was hurt because I couldn’t understand, let alone wrap my head around why this person would do that to me.

Yet something made them do it and it hurt. They hid behind false names and false email addresses, yet an IP address doesn’t lie. I knew who it was.

Some may say I took the comment too personally, yet I felt slightly threatened and definitely slandered. Since the comment was made public on my website, I’ll share it with you:

Patty Kastner commented on “Stay Out Of My Bubble”

Did it ever occur to you that you reflect all that you are, that perhaps you create all these situations because of your own self loathing?
You seem to gave a central theme in all your blogs that portray you as a victim, not as an enlightened, loving spiritual being. Good luck on your “project” …looks like you have a lot of self work to do.

I deleted the other comments the moment I read them in August, but the theme and the tone were the same. It was a direct attack on me as a person, not me as a writer. It was the voice of someone who hated me and the life I’m living with my love, Rob. It was someone that is so angry with me that they wanted to publicly slander me.

And the truth is, I’m not any of those things. I’m not self-loathing and I definitely do not play a victim. I try and take all my experiences I’ve gone through, the good and the bad, and share them with others in the hope that I can help them through when there was no one to help me. I want to inspire and motivate people; I want to spread kindness and hope; I want to make a difference in the world and in another human beings life; I want to try and make the world a better place.

When I saw that comment on Saturday morning it felt as though someone punched me in the stomach. When I realized it was from the same person from months ago, my heart sank…because it was then I realized who it was.

I spoke to the police and knew what I could do, but then I thought about the rest of that family. They shouldn’t pay for that person’s feelings towards me. I was angry and I was hurt. Even as I write this I would love to sit down with this person and ask them why they did that to me. Why did they hate me so much?

And then I realized the answer: some people are so unhappy in their own lives that they take it out on others; they want what someone else has and if they can’t have it, they’ll try and ruin it; they’re jealous, they’re insecure and they’re lost souls with no direction. They don’t understand that they can have all those things on their own but they can’t or won’t because they don’t love themselves, don’t respect themselves, and would rather play the martyr than to do the work on themselves to have the best life they can have.

I’m not angry anymore because I forgave them. I had to. Holding onto the anger keeps it alive and gives that person and what they did control and power over me, and I won’t have it. So I decided to forgive them, and let go of the anger. I didn’t call them or let them know I forgive them, I forgave them for ME! And once I did that I realized that there was no more anger, and by forgiving them I took back my power and my control.

Today I forgave them but I’ll never forget the three comments they wrote about me. I’ll forgive them but I’ll never forget what they said. Never.

And now you know why I am on a mission of spreading the word to all of you to be kind to one another.

The world will never get better with hate and jealousy, but there’s a good chance it will change with kindness.

One step at a time…

One random act of kindness at a time…

One person being kind to another…

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

 

“Kindness Is Free”

kindness6

I’m on a roll this week about kindness. Last week I was the target of people being incredibly “unkind” to me. It saddens me to know that people can be that way, yet we’re all wired differently.

Kindness is free. It doesn’t cost any money and it doesn’t cost a lot of time. In fact, being kind to someone else actually gives a gift back to you: it makes you feel good that you made someone else feel good by being kind to them.

Yet there are those that choose not to be kind; they choose to be mean and hurtful. Theykindness4 choose to judge you without knowing who you. And some choose to be mean because they do know you and want what you have: in other words, they’re jealous. Or they’re insecure. Or they just want to be mean because they hate you.

I try to spread kindness wherever and to whomever I can. I love to make someone smile, or feel better, or laugh out loud! I love to be there with a listening ear and shoulder to cry on if someone needs me. I love to sit with someone who doesn’t want to be alone.

But someone was mean to me last week. They wrote things about me that weren’t true. They hid behind a false name and email address. They couldn’t say those things to me in person because they didn’t have the courage to do so; they are a coward.

They are mean. They are unkind. They are hurtful.

And they must be one sad soul to want to hurt someone else.

I forgive them for what they did, and I can only do that so I don’t stay angry. But I will never forget what they said and did.

I believe in my heart that if everyone in the world was kind we’d be living in a much different world.

Be kind, share random acts of kindness to others, and be kind in the things you say.

Kindness can change the world.

As I always say: “It’s time to make a difference and we can make a difference together.”

Let’s start that difference today…

And let’s keep it going every day.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

kindness5

“When The Excitement Slows Down”

changing-your-life-post-1

Life is meant to be exciting, that is, if you want it to be. There will always be challenges that crop up now and again, yet it’s our choice to continue to find the excitement in even the worst of times and the most mundane of days. It’s our choice to embrace the day, no matter the sadness or stress, knowing that it won’t always be that way…just for the day. It’s your choice to weather the storm with grace and dignity, or allow it to overcome you with hopelessness and despair.

My life hasn’t always been the happiest. There have been many moments of fear, sadness, anger and hopelessness. I’ve learned lessons from all that life had to hand me, and because of that, I’m able to sit back in the worst of moments and try to find some excitement, or at best, find some joy and happiness. There’s always something in every day, big or small, to be grateful for. It may be as small that first cup of coffee in the morning that starts your day, to something big like an awe-inspiring sunset or that feeling of knowing you are loved.

So often life gets the best of us. It gets busy and throws a wrench in a life that was going along smoothly. It hands us a challenge we’re too tired to handle or ill-prepared to overcome; it hands us a life changing moment that we weren’t prepared for; it hands us an end to something that we thought was a beginning.

It’s at those times of uncertainty that we tend to lose our excitement.

And it’s at those times that we have to pay attention to what matters most…love and all the excitement it’s meant to bring, if we would just allow it.

I don’t like when life gets boring, but I love when it’s peaceful. I don’t like when life hands me a challenge, but I love learning the lesson and overcoming it. I don’t like when relationships get stagnant, but I love finding something new in something old. I don’t like feeling invisible, but I love finding my light.

Excitement can be exhausting when you’re already exhausted, yet it’s one of the most exhilarating feelings in the world. Excitement for love and your life can bring you happiness and joy, peace and contentment, and most importantly, a new perspective on it all. Excitement for even the smallest and biggest of things can alleviate the exhaustion and enhance the gratitude of the blessings in them all.

I don’t like when the excitement slows down and all the challenges speed up. It’s at that moment that I need to find my balance, and I’m one to always try and tip the scales to the excitement side, that side that holds the love, the joy, the happiness for life. The challenges will come and go, and if you’re not paying attention, so will the people you love. You have to make the choice of what’s more important, and for me, love wins out every time.

Love is what helps me to overcome the challenges; love is what gets me through the bad times; love is what gives me strength to do it all. Love is my excitement for the people I love and for the life that I live each day with them.

Don’t lose sight of what and who you love; don’t lose sight of the excitement they bring to you; and don’t ever take any of it for granted, because one day you could wake up and find it gone.

And when the excitement  seems to be slowing down, and the boring seems to be speeding up, then you know it’s time for a change. Switch it up and see what happens, and if you find that nothing you do works, perhaps your “excitement” is meant to be found elsewhere.

Life is always changing, and if you want something in your life to change, you need to remember that the change begins with you.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

 

“Just be kind…”

I see so many references to “random acts of kindness” that I have to wonder just how many of us live by that. There needn’t be a certain day to do it, or a contest to see how many “acts” you can perform. Shouldn’t we all live each day by sharing an act of kindness to someone? Has the world gotten so busy that we’ve forgotten to take a minute or more to do something for someone else?

I love to make someone happy, to make them smile or laugh; I’m grateful if I can help someone through a bad day or simply let someone know how much I love them. I believe these to be “random acts of kindness” as well.

The world is focused on so many “other” things at the moment, and let’s face it, there are days that we, ourselves, get caught up in the drama and the rat race of life. Yet, “kindness” is stress-free, drama-free, and one of the easiest acts to commit! “Kindness” to others is a two way street; everyone benefits from it.

Don’t you feel good when you’ve done something for someone else? Can you imagine a world filled with people that act from the heart and with kindness? It’s not a fantasy to imagine that, because it all begins with “you.” And as I always say: “It’s time to make a difference, and we can make a difference together!”

Make every day an “act of kindness” day and watch the world change!

Wishing you love, light, and kindness,

~Anne Dennish~

Be-kind-to-one-another