“My Restless Soul”

I feel restless. It used to be that I only felt that way once or twice a year, yet lately this feeling is happening more and more frequently. I’m feeling restless, feeling bored, feeling like I need a new adventure; I need something new, something exciting, something different. I need to feed my soul because it’s my soul that’s feeling restless. I guess you could say I have “restless soul syndrome!”

Don’t get me wrong, I love my life, yet there are moments even I wonder if this is as good as it gets or this is all there is…and I’m at that point now, and I’m sure I’m not the only one who feels that way now and again. Maybe some of you feel that way as well.

Life seems to morph into a ritual of the same people, the same parties, the same old same old…and while I love those people and those parties I need new experiences as well. I’m not one who can stay in a box and that same comfort zone for too long. I need to experience new things, new people, and new adventures.

And that’s where I am today…feeling restless. I’m wondering what direction I need to move in my life next, what I should be doing differently, what I’m missing out on. I love my writing and I couldn’t imagine a day without writing something, yet in the midst of that I find myself in the middle of laundry, housework and mundane routines…

And I’ve lived that life before…

I’ve been a full time housewife and mother, and as the kids have grown older, there’s not much need for it now. I have two of my five children living home now and both boys tell me that they want me to do more as a writer, that they love the fact that I AM a writer, and they support me through it all. They want to see me out there in the world catching my dreams, always believing that something wonderful is about to happen, and living my life pursuing my passion of writing. They know I’m always there as their mom but they want so much more for me. They’re two very impressive boys and I’m grateful for them every day. They sometimes see in me the potential and ability that I sometimes lose sight of in myself.

They believe in me.

They love me.

And they want me to do the same for myself.

They both lived through my breast cancer with me…they were there for the diagnosis, the treatment and the recovery, and ever since then they want me to do what makes me happy. They want me to write, to publish more books, and to try and make a difference in the world. They want me to live my life in a way that I never had before. They want me to live my life making the world a better place.

And believe me, they’ve done that for me.

So here I am, knowing all that I know, feeling restless…wanting more, desiring more, and ready for another adventure. I want to push the envelope and shoot for the moon. I want to dream bigger and better; I want to write more and share more with the world; I want to step out of this box I find myself in and push the limits to one of endless possibilities.

And I’m the only one that can do that. I own the fact that I’m feeling restless and I know that it’s up to me to change it.

I want to fuel that fire that ignites my soul.

Feeling restless doesn’t mean I’ll change who I am; feeling restless means that the Universe is trying to tell me something. It’s taking who I am and trying to make me a better person. It’s trying to teach me a lesson and tell me that there’s more that awaits me in this world. It’s telling me to get out from under the laundry and move up to what it has to offer me next. It’s telling me that there’s another experience waiting for me if I’ll just open my eyes and see it.

So, while I’m feeling restless today I know that tomorrow is another day with endless possibilities and new experiences just waiting for me to grab onto them, move forward with them, and let them guide me to the next chapter in my life.

I know these moments of feeling “restless” are for a reason and I can’t wait to see what they are!

I’m ready to take a leap of faith and open up the door to something new…

Are you?

It’s a good thing.

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~

restless soul

 

“Go With The Flow”

My apologies to all of you for my page having been so quiet, but life has a way of sneaking up on us and slowing us down…and that’s what happened to me in the last few weeks.

I had a few trips to the ER for a swollen Achilles tendon which put me on crutches and strict instructions to stay off my feet for a week or two. That was tough, I’ll admit, to have to sit with my foot elevated, watching mindless television day in and day out. I didn’t last a week or two, but a few days in my foot was feeling better.

Next was a beautiful family wedding on the beach which lasted for the weekend. My foot was feeling good enough to throw on low heels and dance with my love all night. The next morning I would find myself with a few numb toes and it was off to the ER yet again. This time it was torn ligaments and again, instructions to stay off my foot as much as possible.

In the midst of all of this I was getting my youngest back to junior year of high school and my other son off to college. They didn’t need much help but as a mom, I wanted to be there when they left for the day and here when they got home.

I was frustrated, to say the least, at having to say “no” to certain situations which I knew would take a toll on my healing foot. I was mad at myself for not heeding the strict instructions from the doctor. And I was suffering from a long “writers block.”

And then I began to realize that this was a test of patience, of will, and of strength. It was the Universe telling me to slow down, and it was “life” teaching me that I need to remember to “go with the flow.”

All too often we want to control our life and all that happens within it, and while that is certainly true at times, that we DO have control over our life, sometimes our life takes control of US when we’re not paying enough attention to what’s best for us; what’s best for our Highest Good.

And that’s what happened to me.

My foot is feeling better, my writers block is unblocking, and the house seems to be back in balance again. It was a rough road, but once I realized why it was all happening, I began to relax and accept what was and what will be once I do.

Sometimes  life has to remind us to just “go with the flow.”

Wishing you love and light,

~Anne Dennish~